


The Golden Boy

by JolinarJackson



Series: Mosaic 'verse [4]
Category: Torchwood
Genre: Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Implied Mpreg, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-23
Updated: 2015-06-14
Packaged: 2018-03-19 07:10:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 44,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3600909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JolinarJackson/pseuds/JolinarJackson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack is determined to find his lover Matthew, who went missing in the 30s. He invents a dangerous plan to reach his goal: a trip to the past. Meanwhile, the events of the past few months catch up with Ianto, while Gwen finds herself struggling with her feelings for Owen after their one night stand.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Spoiler: Everything Changes, Cyber Woman, Countrycide, Random Shoes, To The Last Man, Fragments / Doctor Who: Boomtown, Doomsday  
> Setting: after Countrycide  
> Warnings: Thoughts and talk about cannibalism, hints of suicide, Mpreg of an OC (in the past), sex, language  
> Beta: Frankly, I would have really been lost without my betas this time around. I was way too focussed on something that just wouldn't work out and they told me to drop it. danian and alt_universe_me did the English version and Vistin did the German one. Thanks to all of your for hunting down typos and awkward phrases. Most of all thanks for your comments on the plot. It helped me to really improve the story.

**Prologue**

 

Everything in the Torchwood Hub was as it should be: Tosh's computers beeping away, Owen and Gwen's computers displaying screensavers, all the whirring and clacking and humming sounds that were so typical for the underground base echoing through the cavernous main Hub, bouncing off tiled and concrete walls. The sounds of the Hub were the loudest at night, when no laughter or chit-chat was penetrating the air, when no steps were heard on the metallic spiral stairs leading up to the second level of the base. The conference room's lights up there were dimmed, the greenhouse's harsh neon lamps on the other side of the gantry seeming so much brighter in comparison. 

Jack Harkness, sitting on the metal steps leading towards the entrance door, didn't pay any attention to any of these things. He was staring at the door where the Fairies had painted their message to him a few nights ago. The paint was long gone, its red streaks forming letters on the steel of the door had vanished after an hour of scrubbing. Jack could still see them.

_He's alive. Look closer._

He'd been furious at the Fairies at first, for coming into his base, for invading his memories and for meddling in his affairs, but after a night from hell in the Brecon Beacons, after three days of watching his traumatized team, the small hope that the Fairies were trying to help him had grown and now, he was determined to do something about that message. The Fairies knew a lot about the world, so who was he to say that they were lying this time? Maybe they'd really seen something over seventy years ago, when Jack's lover Matthew had vanished without a trace. Maybe Matthew was alive, somewhere in this base, waiting for someone to find him. 

Jack had spent the last three days searching the base for some sign that Matthew was still there – hidden in a walled-off room or somewhere else. He'd studied plans of the base, spent hours walking the underground complex, without success. A new idea was needed. 

Jack let his gaze travel through the huge main Hub, up to Myfanwy's nest just under the ceiling, down over the water tower in the center of the room to the Rift manipulator hidden within. And all of a sudden, he found inspiration.

***

Waking up felt like he was struck by lightning. He wanted to scream but his voice failed him. When he opened his eyes, he saw strange things. At first, there was a wall in a light blue colour directly above and next to him. When he made an effort, he could see the blurred outlines of a room bathed in a weak light. He was only ever awake for a short time and he could never tell just how much time went by between his moments of lucidness or how often he ripped from sleep. 

He was tied up. He could feel broad restraints holding down his hips, his knees, his feet, his elbows and his wrists. 

There was always a soft hum after he woke up, followed by a deep click, then silence. Not long after that, the hum sounded again, something touched his shoulder and he fell asleep again until the next time. 

At the beginning, he hoped that they would rescue him. That hope slid away fast, like melting ice. Then he tried to save himself but he was too weak to get free of the restraints. After he'd given that plan up, he cried a lot of times, at first because he couldn't remember who and where he was, then because he did and the memories made everything so much worse. 

Then he gave up, just lying there when he was woken, staring at the blue wall and his weak reflection, trying to hold on to the most important memories of his life. 

_'My name's Matthew York. I'm twenty-six years old. I have a son named Michael and a lover named Jack Harkness.'_

He felt the touch at his shoulder again and got tired. His last thought before darkness claimed him was always the same.

_'Why won't you just let me die?'_


	2. Chapter 2

**1.**

 

After three days of vacation, Ianto Jones felt more exhausted than before he'd been told to stay home and take it easy. Contrary to Owen's advice, he'd hardly slept. Not deliberately. It was just that he went to bed when he got tired, but only a couple of hours later, he awoke, exhausted but wide awake. Being confined to his flat made things even worse. He would have liked to get back to work after the Brecon Beacons but Owen had been against it. Broken ribs, bruises, contusions, scratches and a concussion had sufficed to banish Ianto from the base until he would be able to stand upright for longer than a few minutes.

Jack had dropped by and so had Tosh, Owen and Gwen. However, in-between those visits - for which Ianto hadn't even been in the mood - the hours had crept by slowly. Ianto had never been able to handle idleness. He felt useless and compensated with cleaning until even he'd had to admit that his flat was spotless. Alone in his flat, vulnerable to the silence around him, Ianto realized that he no longer had any casual friends, that he didn't even have the courage to contact his sister, who probably thought he was dead, and that he'd made some serious mistakes in the Brecon Beacons. 

The search for the cause of the missing person reports in the Brecon Beacons had started out as a camping trip and ended as a horror night. If he'd paid better attention, if he hadn't let himself get caught, everything would have ended quite differently. Then Tosh wouldn't have those strangulation marks on her neck. He would have been able to warn Jack early on, and they would have been able to fight off the cannibals. Instead, he'd become a liability, someone who couldn't defend himself, and that was sad for someone trying to become a Torchwood agent. 

Now, he was no longer sure whether his place was in the field. He should just stay at the Hub, sort files, keep everything in order and take Jack's phone calls instead of facing the dangers of the Rift with a gun in his hand. The last case had proven to Ianto that he wasn't a good field agent, and he should take the hint. 

The autumn sun was filtered through the blinds in Ianto's bedroom, making everything a bit calmer and more peaceful. Even the sharp features of Owen's face seemed to be softer. He flinched when Owen prodded his chest, trying immediately to hide his reaction. 

Owen stopped examining Ianto's chest and Ianto buttoned up his white shirt. 

Getting up from the crouching position in front of Ianto's bed, Owen put his hands on his hips. “Alright,“ he said. 

Ianto raised his head to look at him while he straightened his tie. Owen pulled a small bottle with pills from his bag and shook it. “These are pain killers. Not as strong as the stuff I gave you the last few days, but still quite effective. I want you to take them when the pain gets really bad. Also, you will inform someone as soon as you feel ill, and by 'ill' I mean headaches, nausea, lack of appetite and everything else that's not normal.“

“So I can get back to work, then?“

“You won't chase Weevils. You won't carry Weevils down to the cells. You'll have the comms on you at all times, so that you can reach us if something's wrong. You'll eat regularly. I can see that you lost weight again. No ladders, no heavy objects and you won't burn the midnight oil.“ Owen rolled his eyes when Ianto just looked at him impatiently and sighed, “Yeah, you can get back to work.“

“Thank you,“ Ianto said.

Owen handed him the pills. “Take one every four hours, but only if you really need it.“ 

Ianto nodded and got up. 

Owen wasn't done yet and put a hand on his shoulder to hold him back. “You had a concussion,“ he said. “It's possible that you'll experience severe headaches and exhaustion over the next few months.“

“Could be worse,” Ianto said. 

“Yeah. You're right. I just don't want you to underestimate the effects of a blow to your head.” He took his bag and left the bedroom. Ianto put the pills into the pocket of his suit and followed him. 

In the living room, Jack was lounging on the couch and leafing through a coffee table book about Wales. When he noticed them, he got up and put his hands on his hips. “What's the verdict?”

Owen nodded sharply. “He can get back to work, but I want him to take it easy.” He put on his leather jacket. “Ianto, I'd like you not to drive for the next few days.“

Jack smiled at Ianto but spoke to Owen, “I'll give him a lift.“

“Then do me a favour and, for once, drive carefully. Ianto's not invincible.” Owen's voice was sharp and cool and Jack seemed to be taken aback by that. His broad grin dimmed a bit and his eyebrows pulled together. Ianto had noticed over the last few days that there was something brewing between Owen and Jack. Maybe it was because of the Brecon Beacons. They were all a bit wired up.

Owen nodded at Ianto, gifted Jack with a glare and left. The door slammed shut behind him. 

Jack seemed to shake off Owen's behaviour and focused on Ianto. “So, ready for work?“

“Certainly, sir.“

“Great,” Jack said, his grin back full force. Strangely enough, it didn't have the same uplifting effect on Ianto as before. 

Jack fetched Ianto's coat from the back of the couch – apparently Ianto hadn't been the only one looking forward to his return to work – and held it open for him. Ianto hesitated for a moment at the unexpected role reversal, then he let Jack help him into the coat. Jack smiled when he came around Ianto and fixed his collar just so, so that everything was just how Ianto liked it. He kissed Ianto's lips and grinned. 

Ianto frowned mistrustfully. “You're in a good mood.“ 

The last few days seemed to have been hard on Jack. He'd been withdrawn and quiet. He'd come in the evening to eat dinner with Ianto and spent some time with him. Then, when Ianto went to bed, Jack left and came back in the early hours of the morning, always a bit down. At first, Ianto had thought that he was dealing with something the Rift had spat out, but then Tosh had mentioned during one of her visits that the Rift was quiet and that Jack was spending a lot of time in the archives, the corridors and the abandoned rooms of the Hub, as if he was looking for something.

Jack wrapped an arm around Ianto's shoulders. “Yes, I am.” He led him towards the door, stopped and stared at him earnestly. “Trust me?“

“Of course.“

“I'm planning something and it'll sound stupid and dangerous, but … it'll work. I need your help to get the others to see that, too. I need all of you – especially Tosh.“

“Okay,” Ianto said, still mistrustful. “What are you planning?”

“A trip.“

Ianto felt his heart skip a beat and pushed back the memories of the wildness of the Brecon Beacons, grinning cannibals, walls splattered with blood and body parts in fridges. 

Jack's hand squeezed his shoulder reassuringly. “Not that kind of trip. If everything goes as I want it to, we won't even leave the Hub.” That calmed Ianto down a bit. “Ianto,” Jack said, suddenly a bit nervous, “I'm planning a trip to the past.“


	3. Chapter 3

**2.**

 

That morning Owen entered the main Hub without a to-go coffee from Starbucks. He knew that Ianto and Jack would arrive shortly and even though there were many things he didn't like about Ianto and even though he loved teasing him – his coffee was heavenly and definitely worth the wait. 

Myfanwy was circling the water tower in the center of the room, suddenly diving down to catch a fish from the basin at the foot of the sculpture. Tosh and Gwen were already there. They were sitting at their desks, their chairs turned towards each other.

“So,“ Gwen said, “Jack, Owen and I got out of the car to have a look, right? Police everywhere because, well, apparently someone was bound to notice an alien ship crash-landing in Highstreet. And while Jack was starting to tell them about a meteor, there's suddenly that guy standing in my way, trying to show me pictures of UFOs.“ 

Owen passed Tosh's desk and dropped into his chair. “Are you talking about the new love of your life?“ he asked with a grin. 

Gwen's amused smile froze and she avoided his eyes. Alright, she was still feeling guilty. Owen started to wonder why she even slept with him at all if she couldn't even look him in the eye afterward. 

“He's not the love of my life.“

“Please! Even I can see that he's madly in love with you.“ Owen raised his voice a few octaves and adapted a breathy, nervous tone, “Oh, sorry, I'm Eugene. Eugene Jones. Please listen to me for a second. I have to show you something.“ He went on with his normal voice. “Right, he wants to show you something you only get to see in his wet dreams.“

Gwen crossed her arms and glared at him. “You're a jerk.“ She looked at Tosh who was listening attentively. “He's kinda adorable. Of course, really not my type, one of those _Star Trek_ geeks, I bet, but those guys are really nice most of the time.“

Owen snorted. “He's a loser. A total social failure.“

“He's not the only one here,“ Gwen said, looking at him pointedly. 

Owen raised his eyebrows. “What's that supposed to mean? Don't you like me anymore?“

She tucked her hair behind her ears nervously and turned away. Maybe she didn't want Tosh to see her blushing. “As if I ever did.“ 

Owen turned to his computer with a grin. “I know better.“ He could feel Gwen's glare dig into his back. 

Tosh asked, “How come?“

Owen saw that she was smiling carefully as if she couldn't believe she'd asked. And maybe that was even true. He knew that she had a crush on him. He wasn't interested in the least and even went as far as telling her about his shags, but he decided to draw a line here. “Doesn't matter,“ he answered. It would hurt Tosh deeply if she knew that he'd slept with Gwen. He still remembered her reaction to his affair with Suzie. One night stands seemed to be one thing, but affairs with their colleagues were more hurtful. Owen was a lot of things, but there was no reason for him to be cruel to Tosh. “Never mind. It's nothing.“

Jack and Ianto's arrival saved him from more questions.

“Good morning, kids,“ Jack said with a grin. “Look who I brought with me.“ He made a big gesture in Ianto's direction as if he was a wizard presenting his assistant and Owen watched Ianto avoiding all their eyes, uncomfortable with the attention. “Be nice,“ Jack said with a smile. “He's still not quite healed.“

Gwen smiled at Ianto and he gave her a nod before Tosh pulled him into a careful hug. 

Jack put his hands on his hips. “Okay, large to do-list. Tosh, check the scanners and find out if the Rift's going to act up today and tomorrow. I have plans but we'll need a bit of free time on our hands. Everyone, we're having a meeting in the boardroom in half an hour. Gwen, how are things going with the police reports?“

“I'm not through yet but I don't think that there's anything of interest in it. Give me another fifteen minutes.“ 

“Okay. Ianto, I need two things from the archives. Make some coffee and come into my office. I'll give our the file numbers. Owen, please feed the Weevils and Myfanwy.“ 

Owen rolled his eyes. “Why me?“

Ianto shook his head. “I can-“

Jack interrupted him, “You want to climb up to Myfanwy's nest with your ribs? And I won't even let you get close to a Weevil until your reaction time isn't dampened by pain killers anymore.“ He looked at Owen. “No discussion. I'll do the evening rounds tonight so you can do it now.“ 

Owen snorted. “As you wish, captain.“ He knew how hostile he might sound, but he didn't really care. He knew Jack's secret. Nobody knew that he'd found out about it, not even Gwen who'd told him in the first place that Jack couldn't die in St. Davids Hospital, pumped full of morphine while her gunshot wound had been properly treated. She didn't seem to remember her slip of the tongue and Owen was glad that the nurse who had been with him had blamed the story on Gwen's overactive, drugged imagination. But Owen knew that it was true. Maybe he'd always known. Jack, who couldn't die, sent them, mortal, into dangerous situations. Why not? It wasn't as if he had anything to lose. 

Jack headed for his office and Ianto for the coffee machine. When the aroma of freshly brewed coffee penetrated the air of the main Hub, Owen relaxed a bit. At least some kind of normalcy could return now. The last few days had been hard. They had all been scared to death and Ianto's absence hadn't made work any easier on them. Of course, they still had had some practice from when Ianto had been suspended. Nevertheless, it would be great to have everything back to normal. Routine.

Ianto stopped next to Owen with a tray and put a mug on the desk. Owen nodded at him and took a healthy swallow. Routine tasted heavenly.

***

The condition of Jack's office was always a hint to how he was feeling. It had nothing to do with order, Jack wasn't a very orderly person and it was difficult to keep any sort of order on his desk that was hidden beneath paperwork, coral and other important and unimportant knick-knacks. It was the lighting: when he let the blinds down, he wanted to be alone. When the lights were dimmed, he was either angry or sad. When he drank scotch, too, he was desperate, but that almost never happened. 

Now the blinds were up and the door was open, all the lights were on and Jack was sitting with his chin propped on one hand at his computer. Everything was just fine, apparently. 

Tosh knocked on the door. 

Jack looked up from his computer and smiled. “Tosh.“

She was relieved to see that he was in a good mood. The last few days had been difficult for him. He'd been withdrawn and spent a lot of time in the endless corridors of the Hub. 

She stepped up to his desk. “I don't think that the Rift will act up over the next 48 hours. A few minor spikes but they shouldn't be big enough to let anything come through.“ 

He frowned. “The Rift has been suspiciously inactive the last few weeks.“

“Yes. Could be that it's the calm before the storm.“

“But not over the next couple of days?”

She shook her head. “We're free for 48 hours.“

He grinned broadly. “Perfect. Thank you, Toshiko.“ Then he got up and came around his desk, his hands shoved deeply in the pockets of his trousers. “How are you doing?” he asked softly.

“I'm fine,” she said. 

“You sure?” he asked. 

“Yes.” She didn't need to mention that she had been unable to sleep the last few nights, that nightmares were keeping her awake. She was sure that Jack already knew that.

“You can call me anytime, you know that,” he said. 

“Yes. Thanks.” After her imprisonment by UNIT, it had helped that Jack had been there for her at night, via phone or actually in her flat, but she was determined to face this trauma alone. At work, she was fine. It became difficult when she was at home where the memories came out to haunt her, but she knew that she would get over it eventually. One night with cannibals versus a few months of UNIT imprisonment … the cannibals were easier to get over.

He smiled – proudly, as if he'd read her thoughts – and headed for the boardroom. Tosh sighed deeply and turned to follow, noticing Ianto returning from the archives, carrying a box and a file.


	4. Chapter 4

**3.**

 

Tosh thought that the boardroom, not the main Hub, was the heart of the base. The main Hub was more of an entrance hall beneath the boardroom where the team could work and the things they needed daily were stashed. Tosh didn't like it because it wasn't easy to keep an eye upon. The desks, the water tower and the niches and dark corners, the many corridors that ended in the main Hub – everything was a potential security risk. In addition, every sound echoed through the cavernous room and there was always water running down the tower, coming from the top of it high above Roald Dahl Plass, and when she was having a bad day, the splash-splashing was more annoying than calming. That's why she worked up here in the boardroom whenever she got the chance. From here, she had a perfect view of the main Hub but it was quiet. Tosh had wondered more than once why Jack didn't have his office up here, but that could be because he already felt a bit isolated in his office.

Tosh entered the boardroom with her laptop under her arm. She was the last one to arrive and hurried to her seat, nodding at Ianto when he served her coffee.

“Alright,” Jack broke the silence. “I've got news.” He opened the file, got out a picture and held it up for all to see. It was old and a bit faded, but Tosh could still see the young man pictured on it. An unruly mop of dark, curly hair and a friendly, boyish face. “This is Matthew York. He worked for Torchwood from 1931 to 1933 and vanished – nobody knows where to or why.”

Owen wobbled on his chair, his hands folded in his lap. “Death by Torchwood,” he said.

“He's not dead,” Jack snapped, unusually sharp. Tosh frowned. It wasn’t like Jack to be so unreasonably aggressive, most of all not against Owen, who was allowed to go further than anyone else in annoying Jack. Tosh thought that they both secretly loved their arguments. If they were in danger, they could be sure of the others' help, no matter what, but Owen hated to be ordered around and Jack seemed to love any good challenge. 

Jack looked at the picture himself. “He wasn't even on the field team. He was Constantine Jane's secretary – that guy was Torchwood Three's leader at the time. Matthew … got pregnant when he stashed a technology called a fertilizer in the archives. It's a device developed in the 30th century and it allows male, humanoid lifeforms to get pregnant with a baby made from the father's genes. It wasn't that popular anymore after there were new possibilities where a pregnancy was made possible for every couple – no matter the gender. Men got some kind of in vitro fertilization – it was a more secure way.“

Tosh had learned early on – in her first few months at Torchwood, that men could get pregnant and that it already had happened – at Torchwood and even with some members of UNIT. Situations like these weren't easy to avoid if one handled futuristic devices. Toshiko knew that there was a crux with those pregnancies. The babies died often enough after complications. Must be that humans' genetic framework would change over time and that was what made a male pregnancy possible in the future. 

That was why Tosh was shocked when Jack said, “Michael was born a healthy boy.”

Owen leaned forwards. “What? Both of them survived?“

”Yeah.”

Owen's eyes narrowed. “Why didn't you tell me? Jack, you knew that I was researching male pregnancy for half a year and I always ended up clueless. Those records could have helped me.“

“The files don't exist anymore.“

Owen shook his head, aghast. “What?” 

“There were worries about UNIT coming in to get Michael and Matthew and experiment on them. So the files were burned. Constantine wasn't amused, but he had to give in.“

Tosh tilted her head to the side. “You're talking as if you knew him.”

And even though it already was not a secret anymore, Jack's answer, the confirmation, made her look at him in amazement. “I knew him. I knew Matthew – and Michael.”

Owen said, “Because you can’t die.“

“I can die, but I don’t stay dead.“

Tosh frowned. “How's that possible?” she asked.

Jack looked at her and smiled helplessly. “No idea. It hasn't been that way forever. I can't say what caused it, but I died and then I woke up again.” He looked at all of them as if he was unsure if he should speak his next words, but then he said, “I was a companion of the Doctor for a while.“

Gwen frowned. “You mentioned him before. Who's that?“

Ianto answered, “Time Lord. He can travel space and time and is one of the threats Torchwood is supposed to protect Earth from, but the director of Torchwood One didn't think so and treated him as a guest when he visited us. It wasn't his fault that Torchwood One got destroyed a few hours later. I read a lot about him in the archives and I doubt that he's dangerous.“

Jack nodded. “He's only trying to help. I don't see him as a threat but as a friend. He protects Earth from threats.” For a moment, his eyes clouded over with memories and he smiled, before he cleared his throat and said, “Nevertheless, my condition has something to do with him. It happened while I was traveling with him. I hope that he can explain it to me when I see him the next time.” He glanced at Matthew one last time and put the picture back where it belonged. He closed the file and smoothed over the folder with a hand, then he explained, “I've been part of Torchwood since the 19th century. And I knew Matthew. He survived the pregnancy because of our extraordinary doctor and a just as extraordinary scientist on our team – Eveline Mason and James Lees. My knowledge about alien technology, James' talent to always find a way and Eveline's medical knowledge allowed us to help Matthew carry the child to term. It was difficult a lot of the time, but we made it.” He leaned back in his chair and steepled his fingers under his chin. “But he vanished without a trace two months after Michael's birth. We never found him. Before we made for the Brecon Beacons the Fairies told me that he's still alive and in this base.“

Now Tosh understood why Jack had been spending so much time down in the Hub's basement in the last few days. He'd looked for Matthew but he hadn't found him.

Owen was looking thoughtful. “He vanished over seventy years ago,” he said. “From that picture, I'd say he's in his twenties – he's dead, Jack.”

“There are technologies that could keep him alive. I know that the Fairies aren't trustworthy, but I believe them.“

“Because you want it to be true”, Owen said, skeptical. “It could be a trick.“

“If there's the tiniest chance of them being right, then I'll find him, Owen.” Jack looked at him determinedly.

“How?” Owen asked. “He hasn't been found for seventy years.“

“That's where it gets complicated”, Jack admitted. “We didn't find any unusual energy readings in the Hub.”

Tosh nodded an affirmative, when Jack looked at her questioningly. She'd looked for something like that a few days ago, because he'd asked her to.

“So if he's here, trapped and kept alive by technology, then we can't see the energy signature.“

Tosh took a guess, “Isolation? Maybe lead. And I couldn't find any unusual readings on the electrical consumption, so maybe an independent small generator. An alien one, otherwise it'd need fuel frequently.”

“Right,” Jack said. “So I tried comparing blue prints. Ones that were drawn before Matthew vanished and ones that were drawn shortly after. I wanted to find evidence of walled-off rooms and such. There is a new blue print of the base that was drawn in 1933, shortly after he went missing. It's in my office.“

Gwen chewed her bottom lip. “I find that an odd coincidence. Did you compare it to an older plan?”

“There are no older plans,” Jack said. “I searched the archives. Every blue print that was drawn before 1933 is gone.“

Gwen leaned forwards. Her curiosity was getting the better of her now, the PC taking charge. “Strange.“

Tosh nodded and looked at Jack. “What are you going to do now?” she asked. 

He smiled at her. “You'll love it.” He opened the box and pushed it towards her. There, embedded in foamed plastic, was a flat plate a bit smaller than the palm of her hand.

It was gray and when Tosh touched it carefully, she noticed that the surface was smooth. She took it out of the box. “What is this?”

“An energy cell. We found it in the ruins of Torchwood One. It fits ...” Jack pulled off his wristband. “... in here.” He handed her the wristband and Tosh accepted it hesitantly. He'd never before allowed her to examine it. 

Owen leaned towards her to get a look at it and the box. “Okay,” he said, “and what's that?“

“It's called a vortex manipulator. It allows me to travel through time.”

“That's yours?” Owen asked. Jack nodded and Owen frowned. “You joined Torchwood in the 19th century, but that thing isn't from that time, so it means that you aren't either.“

“As I said, I traveled with the Doctor. I'm from a different time.“

Owen shook his head, not satisfied with that answer. “What time?”

“The future.” He didn't seem to want to get more specific.

“And it never occurred to you that we might like to know that?”

“Of course,” Jack answered. “There was no need for you to know.”

Owen snorted and leaned back in his chair. 

Jack turned to Tosh. “You can help me to to repair the manipulator.”

Tosh smiled happily.

Jack grinned. “I knew you would like that.”

A while ago, Tosh had tried to get Jack to let her take a look at his wristband. She was interested in its diverse functions. Jack used it to activate the invisible lift and that meant that it was linked to the Hub's computers. He also could detect energy and life signatures with it. Tosh was pretty sure that those functions were only the beginning. He'd always refused her.

Gwen propped her head up on one hand and looked at Jack curiously. “And what'll happen then?” she asked. 

“Then I'll travel into the past, find older plans to copy or photograph and return. Then we'll compare them with newer blue prints, find Matthew and discover what happened to him.“ 

Sneering, Owen added, “And then we clock off at five pm.” He raised his head to look at Jack. “What's up with you and that kid? Did you shag him?“

Jack's face hardened. “I'd do the same for every other Torchwood member, Owen.“

“That's a yes.”

Gwen sighed deeply. “Owen, I agree with Jack.”

Owen snorted. “Of course you do.”

“No, really,” she said. “If he's still alive, however that might be possible, then he's been trapped for seventy years. We have to help him.”

“I'm not heartless,” Owen said impatiently. “I know that we have to do that. I just don't like all those secrets coming to light here.”

“I think we all know that now,” Gwen said with a firm voice and stared at Owen in warning.

He raised both his hands and then crossed his arms. “Alright. Calm down.”

The others had watched the argument silently. Now, Jack said, “The Rift will be quiet for the next 48 hours. Nevertheless, it could still send something through and you'll have to manage it alone.”

Ianto clasped his hands around his mug. “How long will you be gone?”

Gwen added, “And shouldn't someone come with you?”

Jack shook his head. “Time travel is highly unpredictable. Even the Doctor has difficulties in landing at a particular point of time sometimes. It could be that I'll be gone a few hours, even though I programmed the manipulator to send me back a few minutes after my departure. And no, I don't want you to come with me. The manipulator might not work right, even with the spare part. I don't want you trapped somewhere with me.” Tosh noticed how Ianto's hands tightened around the mug of coffee and a curious glance at him revealed his determined face. She assumed that that wouldn't matter to him as long as Jack just needed his help. 

Jack seemed to realize that, too, because he gifted Ianto with a calming smile. “But that's almost impossible.” He looked at all of them again. “I'll program the manipulator to drop me off approximately two days after Matthew went missing. I was in Scotland at that time, so I won't have to worry about me running into myself. I know that the others are out of the Hub looking for Matthew. I don't think I'll need longer than half an hour to find those plans. I'll try to come back a few minutes after my departure but as I said … it's difficult to predict, the energy cell is a bit older than I'd like it to be and I could arrive back here hours later than I intended.” He looked at them one at a time before saying, “I need your support for this. I need you to help me out. Anything can go wrong and it's possible that I'll be gone for days.“

Ianto and Tosh nodded without the slightest hesitation. Owen shrugged. He still seemed annoyed, but Tosh knew that he wasn't indifferent to Matthew's fate. She felt trapped just by thinking about being imprisoned for such a long time, unable to call for help. 

Gwen sighed and said, “Okay. Let's get started.”


	5. Chapter 5

**4.**

 

Owen made an excuse about needing fresh air and left the Hub. He was angry at Jack for not talking with them about his immortality sooner. And he was angry that the others didn't seem to be bothered by that. 

It was cold and the storm was pulling at Owen's clothes. When he turned towards the sea, holding onto the rail, the wind was powerful enough to take his breath away. The sea was troubled, hurrying towards the bay in big waves. He closed his eyes and ducked his head. The door to the tourist office beside him opened and closed, then heavy steps approached, stopping just behind him. Owen ignored them. He just raised his head and looked out towards the sea, watching ships pass by far away and the yachts and fisher boats, tied to the pier, bobbing up and down. The seagulls were huddling on the rails and masts, chattering loudly, but seemingly not in the mood to dare the storm. 

Jack asked, “Are we going to have problems?“

Owen laughed helplessly, then he turned around to face Jack. “No.“

“You could've fooled me,“ Jack said. His hands were shoved into his coat pockets. The wind was tousling his hair, billowing his coat. 

Owen shook his head. “No, I think I was just ...“ He avoided Jack's eyes. “I don't want you to think that I don't trust you.

Jack leaned next to him on the rail, his eyes worried. Owen hated it when he got that way – all fatherly and understanding. “I thought you would have gotten over the Brecon Beacons.“ 

Owen shook his head before looking at Jack. “Me too.“ He crossed his arms and looked down. “It's not so much about me, you know? It's because of Tosh and Gwen and Ianto. They really got the worst of it. I should have done more to protect them.“

“You did all you could.“ Jack's hand on the nape of his neck was warm and reassuring. “I wasn't there to protect you and you did what a good second in command has to do and took over, Owen. You let them catch you, Gwen and Tosh, but only because you had no other choice and the team trusts you.“ Jack's hand slid to his shoulder and he pulled him closer, until his shoulder was touching the other man's chest. “I'm proud of you,“ Jack said softly. Owen looked up at him. Jack smiled. “I told you before that I'd do anything for each of you. Does it make that much of a difference that I'll come out of it unscathed as long as you're safe?“

“I don't think so.“

Jack nodded and patted his shoulder. 

Owen pushed him away, playfully, but he also wanted to get back some distance. “So, immortal,“ he said. “Does that mean I get to shoot you if you're an arse?“

Jack laughed.

***

From his office, Jack could watch Tosh working on the manipulator. She was efficient and focused and Owen assisted her whenever she needed a third hand. Jack looked towards his door when Gwen knocked. 

“Hey!“ She smiled. He signed to her to come in and she closed the door. “I was wondering,“ she said, stepping closer.

He nodded encouragingly. He'd already assumed that Gwen would come to talk to him. He knew what it would be about. Until now, only Gwen and Ianto had known about Matthew and even though Ianto was just as curious as Gwen, he didn't show it. 

She shoved her hands into the back pockets of her jeans. “If you're able to travel into the past,“ Gwen said, “if you can really do that … why don't you try and save Matthew? Avoid the pain you both went through.“

Jack shook his head. “God, that would be … perfect.“ He smiled longingly, then he became serious. “It would be too much of an interference in time. Michael wouldn't grow up with foster parents … who knows what would change because of that. And if I had stayed with Matthew … it would change too much.“ He shook his head. “No way. It's supposed to be a short trip.“ 

“And if something goes wrong?“ Gwen asked.

“Nothing will. It can't.“ Jack looked at Gwen seriously. “If I miss the chance to help Matthew – again –, I'd never forgive myself.“

***

Ianto nudged aside a pile of catalogues in the tourist office and cleaned the shelf. He didn't know what to think about Jack's plan. He would support him, no question about that, but he couldn't make up his mind about what to think of it. On one hand, there was Matthew who didn't deserve an imprisonment that had already lasted decades. He wanted to help him just as much as the others did. On the other hand, a small part of him wondered what kind of change Matthew's return would bring. Not really for the team, but for Jack and Ianto. He was just getting used to the thought of starting something with Jack. Then again, Jack and Matthew were the real thing – love, a family, a future. Ianto couldn't claim to have anything like the same kind of bond with Jack. Jack himself had told him that it wouldn't be anything serious. Another part of Ianto argued that that was exactly what he should want, because he didn't want anyone in his life, relationships were so hard on him. 

He sighed deeply, cleaned the counter and then stood behind it to check his e-mails. There were only a few administrative messages that he forwarded to Jack. He stared at his now empty in-box and wondered when he'd lost any form of life outside work. 

Canary Wharf. 

The people who used to write him e-mails were all dead. 

Hastily, Ianto closed his browser and turned away to leaf through a happily colored flyer from _Jubilee Pizza_. _'Don't think about it,'_ he told himself. He really didn't need more dark memories at the moment. 

Ianto raised his head in relief when the door to the tourist office opened. He smiled at the young man who looked around curiously. A leather messenger bag was slung over his shoulder and he wore a brown leather jacket. The short blond hair was combed back, the light-blue jeans stonewashed and tight, as was the red sweater.

He glanced at some of the catalogues and flyers before his grey eyes met Ianto's. 

Ianto smiled politely. “Can I be of assistance?“

The man approached the counter. “I guess,“ he said with a charming smile. “I'm looking for … Torchwood.“ He took care to enunciate the last word, watching Ianto's reaction. 

He didn't react. “Torchwood. Is that … a pub?“

The man smiled. “I think you know exactly what I'm talking about, Mr. Jones.“

Ianto let his surprise show. “How do you know my name?“

“Not important,“ the man answered. He pulled a battered notebook from his bag and opened it. “I'd like to talk to your boss, a Major … Captain Jack Harkness?“

“I don’t know anybody by that name,“ Ianto said.

“Hm,“, the man said thoughtfully, looking at his notebook. “Maybe Gwen Cooper or Owen Harper. Is Miss Toshiko Sato present?“

“Who are you?“ Ianto asked, alarmed. It sometimes happened that curious people came into the tourist office, but only every few months. It wasn't surprising. If you asked around Cardiff for Torchwood for long enough, somebody was sure to direct you towards the bay and the tourist office was a sure target for the searchers. Until now, Ianto had always been able to get rid of conspiracy theorists and journalists. On the other hand, none of them had known Jack's name. 

His visitor was again displaying his charming smile. “Ben Bryan. Call me Ben. I suppose we'll see a lot of each other over the next few days.“

“I doubt it. I have no idea what you want from me. I'm managing this tourist office for the city council. That's it.“

“Okay, listen,“ Ben said with a grin that he must think was disarming. “I know everything.“ 

Ianto swallowed. He tried to keep his face neutral. 

Ben seemed to interpret his silence as a confirmation that he could talk, “There are rumours in the city, reports about strange happenings. Monsters coming out of the sewers, Roundstone Wood, strange deaths … the cannibals in the Brecon Beacons are also part of a chain of events linked together by only one word: Torchwood.“ 

“Who are you?“ Ianto asked again. 

Ben took a business card form his jacket pocket. “Tell Captain Harkness that I'd like to talk to him.“ He put the card on the counter. “Or I will go public with speculations, not facts, and the people will get suspicious. If I don't make you the good guys in the evening news, Mr. Jones, you will be the bad guys.“ Ben winked at him and left. 

Ianto looked at the business card. “Freelance journalist,“ he muttered. “Just what we needed.“

***

Jack stared at the business card, biting his lip thoughtfully. Then he raised his head to look at Ianto who was leaning against his desk in the back room of the tourist office, arms crossed. The computer screen displayed CCTV feed from Roald Dahl Plass. Ianto had wanted to show Ben Bryan to Jack, but he was gone. 

Jack sighed. “He's not the first to investigate and he won't be the last.“

“But he knows too much,“ Ianto answered. “He knows all your names. He knows that the Hub is here.“ 

Jack put the business card in his breast pocket. “Okay, we ignore him.“

“That won't solve the problem. What if he finds out more? Maybe he'll follow the SUV or-“ 

“Ianto,“ Jack interrupted him, shaking his head. “He's fishing. The police might have given him the names. He's got nothing solid on us or he would've confronted us in the field.“ He crossed his arms. “Keep an eye on it. We'll deal with it if we have to. At the moment, Matthew's more important.“

Ianto nodded in understanding. “How's it going with the manipulator?“

“Tosh's not sure if she can fix it. The energy cell is a different model than the one already in the wristband. But I think she'll figure it out,“ Jack answered. Nevertheless, he was worried. At the moment, that little trip to the past was the only way to find Matthew. It had to work.

“She will, sir.“ Ianto turned away to collect a few files from his desk. “If you don't need me, I'm going to go down to the archives. It's almost noon.“ Ianto turned back around to Jack, the files pressed to his chest. His shoulders were pulled up and his facial expression anything but relaxed.

Jack frowned, worried. “Ianto, are you okay?“

“Just tired, sir.“

“Are you sure?“ He touched Ianto's cheek. Ianto nodded. Jack's hand slid to the nape of his neck. “You should get some rest. You know that I have a bed in my quarters.“

Ianto displayed a thin smile and looked up at Jack. “Is that an offer for sleep, sir, or something else?“

Jack was relieved about the joke and laughed. “Sleep. You'd be all on your own down there. Except if you didn't want to be.“ He winked.

Ianto laughed softly, but it seemed a bit strained. “I've got work to do. I'll just take some pain killers and have some coffee.“ He kissed Jack, lips closed, but not exactly chastely. “Thank you, though, sir, for the offer.“

“The one where you catch some sleep or the other one?“

Ianto hesitated for a second, then he said, “Both.“ 

Jack's arm wrapped around Ianto's hips and he said softly, “You can always remind me to make you another offer.“

Ianto shook his head. “Let's talk about that as soon as Matthew's back.“ 

Jack felt as if Ianto had slapped him. 

Ianto seemed to notice because he said, “It's possible that the circumstances will have changed tomorrow.“ 

“Ianto-“ 

“No, that's good,“ Ianto said hastily and shook his head. “You deserve it.“ He backed out of Jack's hug. “And now I'll have to leave, sir.“ So he did.

Jack stared after him, still reeling. Actually, he hadn't thought about that until this moment: he would most likely get Matthew back and that would have consequences for his life. Until now, he'd only thought about helping Matthew but never about what success would mean for him. Ianto was right. If they should find Matthew – if they really did – then Jack couldn't let that chance just pass him by. His relationship to Matthew had been a different kind of bond than that he shared with Ianto or anyone else for almost twenty years now. Seventy years ago, he hadn't thought it harmful to settle down for a bit. The new century – the Doctor's arrival – had still been so many years away. Now, it could happen any day. Jack pushed his hands into his pockets. Matthew had mentioned that he would like to meet the Doctor, now he would most likely be able to.


	6. Chapter 6

**5.**

 

Owen dried his hands, brushed them through his hair and glanced into the mirror before he left the bathroom. Gwen was already waiting for him in the corridor, leaning against the wall. Owen stopped and looked at her, a bit on the mistrustful side. He thought he knew what she was going to talk about, but he waited for her to start. “Can I help you?“

“We have to talk,“ she said. 

Owen nodded. “I was already wondering when you'd make your move.“

She stepped closer and lowered her voice as if she was about to reveal a big secret, “It doesn't mean anything and it won't happen again.“

“Okay,“ he said.

“It's because of Rhys. We … we are happy. Us … that was an accident.“

“You almost sound apologetic. Talk to your boyfriend about it, not me. I couldn't care less.“

He turned away to return to work, but Gwen grabbed his arm.

“What?“ Her voice sounded as if she was trying to suppress her anger.

“I couldn't care less,“ Owen repeated.

“You couldn't care less? We had sex, Owen.“

“Yes,“ he said, “we had sex. It was great – just as I told you before, by the way – but it was only one night and as you already said, no repeat performances.“

“How can't you care?“ she asked. 

Owen rubbed his forehead and let out a sigh. “I don't get it. You just told me it didn't mean anything.“

“Yeah, but you make it sound like some kind of duty you had to accomplish.“

“So it meant something to you?“ Owen asked.

Gwen crossed her arms. “No.“

Owen rolled his eyes and pushed past her. “Jesus Christ, damn women!“

***

When Jack left his office to do his irregular check-ups on what his team was doing, the main Hub was mostly quiet. High above the ground, Myfanwy was chattering on in her nest and the water sliding down the tower created a calming background noise. Owen wasn't at his desk. Neither was Gwen. Ianto was still in the archives. 

Jack stopped next to Tosh, watching her work. Her desk was littered with tools and paper with hastily scrawled equations and there were blue prints and mathematic formulas displayed on the computer screens. Tosh loved working with everything she needed spread out around her. She didn't seem to have any problem locating whatever she needed and her skills even seemed better the more mess there was on her desk. Jack located his vortex manipulator next to the energy cell. They were linked to the computer and some other devices via cables.

Tosh was busy connecting some of the cables to a black box. “I can't tell you if it'll work, yet,“ she said.

Jack smiled. “You read my thoughts.“

Tosh turned around to him, pushed her glasses up and gifted him with a small grin. “What else could you want from me?“

“Toshiko,“ he pretended to be shocked, “sometimes I'm just swept away by the wish to watch a beautiful and smart woman at work.“

He watched Tosh blush and tuck a strand of her hair behind her ears. It was good for her to be admired for more than her genius from time to time, so Jack made sure that he did, not any great hardship.

He got serious and leaned on Tosh's desk with crossed arms. “What's the problem?“

“Compatibility.“

“I was afraid so,“ he said with a thoughtful nod. He'd already tried to fix the manipulator himself, shortly after they'd found the energy cell in the ruins of Torchwood One. He was good with technology, even though he liked to leave these things to Tosh who was better than him. It was all about instinct. Tosh's technical instinct was impeccable while Jack's instinct was limited to danger and the chances of success when he flirted.

“The energy cell's too big,“ Tosh explained. “It won't fit into the vortex manipulator.“

He propped his head up on one hand and looked up at her. “There's an 'nevertheless' lingering in your pretty eyes.“

She laughed and pushed him away playfully. “Stop it. I'll try to fix this no matter if you flirt with me or not.“

“I know,“ he answered and stretched for a second, then he shoved his hands into his trouser pockets. 

Owen hurried past them to the med bay. “Damn women!“ he snapped in Jack's direction before vanishing down the stairs.

Gwen followed him, stopped half-way there when she noticed Jack and Tosh, and changed direction towards her desk where she started to hammer on her keyboard, face dark. Jack sighed deeply. It wasn't unusual for Gwen and Owen to fight. They even seemed to enjoy riling each other up and most of the time, it was fun to watch them. But in moments like this, their bickering left the comfort zone and then it got ugly. Jack had resolved early on only to say something when they got out of control. 

That's why he turned back to Tosh. “Ignore the teenagers please.“

“I'm looking for a possible way to transfer the energy in this cell to the old one.“ 

Now, the technical devices on her desk started to make sense to him.

“You need an adapter,“ Jack assumed.

“Yeah. I'm trying to engineer one.“ She pointed at the cables.

“How long 'til you can tell?“

“Two or three hours,“ Tosh answered.

“That's fine,“ Jack answered, patted her shoulder and headed for his office. He passed the entrance to the med bay, where Owen was sulking at his paperwork, apparently not wanting to go to his desk in the main Hub where Gwen could see him.

Jack dropped into his chair and checked his watch. 12.30. He looked at the door and with a precision that amazed Jack anew every day, Ianto entered. 

Before he could ask, Jack said, “Chinese.“ Ianto folded his hands behind his back and nodded. Jack added, “The usual.“

Ianto nodded again and left to take the orders of the others. Jack cursed himself for missing the chance to tell Ianto “Thank you”. After Lisa, he'd resolved to get better at it and he'd managed it well until now, he'd even been able to keep an eye on Ianto's health, but the upcoming time travel – Tosh would manage to fix the manipulator, Jack was sure of it – and the consequences of what he would find were overwhelming him. 

He watched Ianto talking with Tosh about her order. It was good to have him back in the Hub. Jack had never before realized just how much his daily routines had come to depend on Ianto's – at least when they weren't in the field. Ianto had managed to establish a daily schedule and everyone was following his lead. There was a second breakfast for all of them at 9.30, lunch at 14.00 and the last coffee at 17.00. Exceptions were night shifts and cases that refused to get closed. Ianto always arrived first and left last. He had a to-do list he worked through every day that left enough space for unexpected research and other errands. He was fantastic at his job, efficient and neat, and sometimes Jack wondered if he appreciated him enough.

“Sir,“ Ianto said and Jack was startled out of his thoughts. Ianto was holding up a file. “My report.“

“Report?“ Jack asked, confused.

“On the Brecon Beacons.“ He handed Jack the file and headed for the door.

Jack leafed through the pages until he reached the last. “Ianto,“ he said.

Ianto turned back around to face him. “Yes, sir?“

“What's this?“ Jack asked.

Ianto seemed to know what he was talking about and answered, “It's an application, sir.“

“To turn you back into a General Support officer,“ Jack said. He looked up at Ianto. “I just granted your promotion to backup field agent.“

“And now I'm taking back my old job.“

“Why?“

Ianto ducked his head and folded his hands on his back. “My place is here, in the Hub. Not out there.“

“Who says that?“

Ianto seemed tortured, as if he didn't want to answer, but respect forced him to. “Me.“

“Why?“

“Jack.“ Ianto sighed deeply. “I was useless.“

Jack leaned back in his chair. “You were the first one to track the SUV, you saved Tosh's life, you almost died and you didn't lose your nerve. Okay, you weren't perfect. But no Torchwood agent is and it was your first assignment.“

“My performance didn't match the requirements of an agent.“

“Who says that?“

“The rules.“

“Forget the rules, this was as far away from the rules as it gets.“ Jack sighed deeply. “I'm proud of you. All of you. You're amazing with firearms and I don't want to lose you to maintenance.“

Ianto ducked his head. 

Jack said, “Think about it. I won't sign this until you're sure.“

Ianto hesitated for a moment, then he seemed to realize that he didn't have a choice and nodded.

***

While Ianto crossed Roald Dahl Plass with two bags from the Chinese restaurant in his hand, he enjoyed the warmth of the autumn sun on his face. There were disadvantages to working in an underground base. You could lose your sense of time and a clock wasn't really able to replace the sun. Ianto had loved the airy open plan office where the archivists and junior researchers in Torchwood One had worked. The archives had been located in the basement, but every file had been digitalized and Ianto and his colleagues had been able to look at them on their computers in the third level of the building. It had its advantages and since Ianto had started working for Torchwood Three he'd started digitalizing the archives there. Too much work for one person alone, but he didn't mind. That way, nobody would mess up his system.

“Okay, I have no clue. What's your job?“ the voice of a man asked and Ianto stopped. Ben Bryan was lounging on the steps leading into the Plass' basin, grinning at him. “You're manning the tourist office and you're doing the lunch run. I have contacts at the police and they tell me that you were the one they talked to on the phone until Cooper came along. You're never at crime scenes. So, what's your job … secretary?“

“I already told you-“

“Yes,“ Ben interrupted him. “You have no idea what I'm talking about.“ He got up and stepped closer to Ianto. “Honestly, just between the two of us ...“

Ianto hesitated. “Nobody will know you got this from me?“ he asked.

“Of course.“

Ianto signed Ben to come closer and said softly, “Don't tell anyone but the tourist office is just a cover.“

“I knew it,“ Ben said with a grin. 

“The truth is that the prime minister is hell-bent on taking over the world and here – in Cardiff – it will all start.“

Ben rolled his eyes. “Right.“ His mobile rang and he turned away to answer it. Ianto used the distraction to step on the invisible lift.

“Hello?“ Ben asked. “Who's there?“ He turned back around and froze when he couldn't see Ianto. The lift moved downwards. The last Ianto saw of Ben was his confused face.

“We took the liberty of calling him,“ Jack sad loudly when Ianto was half-way down to the main floor of the Hub. He was standing with his hands on his hips near the lift, his head tipped back to look at Ianto. “He's eager.“

“He is,“ Ianto answered. He left the platform when the lift ground to a halt and checked if the false paving stone was in place to conceal the hole the lift had left.

Jack took the bags of food from him. “I asked Gwen to do a background check on him.“

“Thanks for the help.“

Jack laughed. “No worries. I just didn't want our food to get cold because he was asking too many questions.“


	7. Chapter 7

**6.**

 

“Ben Bryan,“ Gwen said a few hours later from her perch on the couch in the main Hub to the team. She had spent a while researching the journalist and – again – was dumbfounded by the volume of databases Torchwood had access to. The police would murder for such equipment, Gwen was sure of it. She read her handwritten notes loudly. “Freelance journalist for several renowned papers in Wales, his girlfriend is Kiera Whittacker – they share a flat. He won prizes for his investigative articles and he's known to be dedicated and bothersome. A lot of money in his account, a couple of savings plans, shares … graduated in Oxford. He's highly intelligent, he's got a PhD. He has several offers from newspapers all around the world but he hasn't accepted any. It seems he doesn't want to settle down.“

Jack leaned in his office door, drinking coffee. “I think he sounds fascinating.“

“Seriously?“ Owen asked, his feet on his desk and his hands clasped behind his head. “You flirt with him when he's not even here?“

Jack grinned, raising his eyebrows, and Owen rolled his eyes.

Tosh raised her eyes from the vortex manipulator. “What are we going to do about him?“ she asked.

Jack looked at Ianto who was standing near the spiral stairs. “If he should come back to the tourist office, he'll get the grand tour.“

Gwen was surprised. “You'll show him Torchwood? He'll write about it.“

Four pairs of eyes stared at her, aghast.

Jack asked, “Do you remember the tour I gave after you found us?“

She shrugged. “Yes.“

“And what happened after that?“ Jack asked.

Gwen frowned. “After that … Retcon?“ She shook her head in disbelief. “That's your answer? Why are we even bringing him down here then?“

“To win his trust,“ Jack answered.

Tosh shrugged. “It's easier to retcon them when they think that they won.“

Owen nodded his consent. “Who would suspect that we'd give them an amnesia pill?“

Ianto ended the explanation casually, “Then we drive to his flat and remove all evidence of us in his research.“

Gwen snorted. “You know that this country has freedom of press, right?“

Jack raised his eyebrows. “We are above freedom of press.“ He turned away, heading for his office.

Gwen stared after him, stunned. “That's your answer?“ she asked loudly. 

Tosh turned her chair in Gwen's direction. “Let it go, Gwen. We can't allow anyone to know about Torchwood.“

“So we just … neutralize him?“ Gwen asked. “That's your answer?“

Owen fished for his keyboard and settled it on his thighs so that he could type without taking his feet from the table. “Yes,“ he said.

***

“Jack,“ Tosh said, entering his office slowly, almost hesitantly. She was holding the vortex manipulator in her hands. Jack assumed that she wasn't sure about her work and that was never a good sign.

He waved her closer and she closed the door – another bad sign. He sat up, straightening his shoulders, and asked, “So?“

Tosh sat down and put the manipulator on the table. “I did what I could. Start up the program and tell me what you think.“

Jack took the wristband and switched it on. He was more nervous than he wanted to admit. He knew that Tosh was really good but this was technology from a time she had no idea of and he hadn't made it easy on her. 

He switched through the menus, glanced at the energy levels – high enough, maybe it would work … an alarm message made his heart skip a beat. 

Tosh must have seen on his face that it wouldn't work, because she put a hand on his arm. “Jack?“ 

He put the manipulator down and rubbed a hand down his face. “No,“ he said. “The energy flow is off. It lacks … time travel eats a lot of energy.“ He shook his head. “A lot.“

“I'm sorry,“ Tosh whispered. She wanted to take the wristband. “But there is enough energy in it, right? It's just the energy flow that's off. Maybe I could-“

“No.“ He took the manipulator and strapped it on. “It's over.“

“Jack, I could-“

“Stop it, Toshiko.“ His voice was a little sharper than he wanted it to be, but he didn't have the patience to be considerate.

“Okay,“ she said softly. “I'm sorry.“ She headed for the door.

“Tosh.“ 

She stopped.

“I'm sorry,“ Jack said gently. He always tried not to snap at Tosh. She didn't believe him when he praised her, but she always took criticism to heart and Jack knew how much Tosh wanted him to appreciate her work.

He looked up at her. “You did what you could. I just thought … it would have been too easy, right?“

“Maybe,“ she answered. She showed him a small smile, a sign of her forgiveness.

He forced himself to smile back. “Send everyone home, okay? Tomorrow, everything will go back to normal.“

“Okay.“ She left the office and closed the door behind her.

Jack leaned back in his chair. He tried again to program the vortex manipulator for a trip through time, but again the device refused him. He'd had this problem before, shortly after he'd started out at the time agency. His partner back then had repaired the manipulator, accidentally causing a time bubble in the process – it had been the longest two weeks of Jack's life, but the manipulator had been repaired. Jack had watched his partner working on it, but he couldn't remember which conductors needed replacement and he didn't want to cause another time bubble – or worse. That was why he didn't want Tosh to continue working on it either. 

His eyes found the corner where Matthew's desk had been and he rubbed his forehead. “Damn.“

***

That thing with Owen was over, but Gwen wanted to tell Rhys the truth, either way. It would be better for their relationship, and that had been a bit strained because of Torchwood lately. She heard a bitter laugh in her mind about her assumption that telling Rhys about her cheating on him would be in any way good for them, the opposite would probably be the case. Nevertheless … she had decided to do it and she would.

She stared at Rhys who was sitting opposite her at the bar separating the kitchen form the living room, eating his dinner. He raised his head, noticed her looking at him and smiled. “This is great,“ he said. When he saw that her plate hadn't been touched yet he asked, “Not hungry?“

“Of course,“ she said hastily and forced down two forks full of food. She had cooked, because she felt guilty and because, for once, she'd been home earlier than Rhys. She wasn't very good in the kitchen and Rhys was doing her a favor by paying her compliments and they both knew it. He loved her and didn't want her to feel bad.

God, she felt like such an awful person!

“Rhys,“ she said cautiously.

“Yup?“ He raised his eyes questioningly.

“I … there was ...“ She swallowed, took a deep breath and then, to her own surprise, said, “One of my colleagues slept with another team member.“

Rhys raised his eyebrows. “Why do you think that?“

“She … told me. She slept with him and ...“

“Aren't you just five people?“

Gwen was irritated by the question and froze in the middle of gesturing wildly. “Yes.“

Rhys pulled a face. “That's not good for the team, right? Two out of five sleeping with each other.“

Gwen decided not to go into the whole Jack and Ianto topic – the typical office affair between boss and who was basically his PA in Torchwood. It was in the past either way.

She just nodded. “She feels awful. She has … a fiance.“

“Huh,“ Rhys said. “That's pretty mean.“

“The guy she slept with is single,“ Gwen explained.

“Doesn't matter,“ Rhys said. “If he knows that she's with someone, he's just as guilty as her. You need two people to tango, right?“ He winked at her.

Gwen felt her stomach do a somersault. “Yes.“

“Why did you tell me then?“ Rhys asked.

Gwen sighed. “Because I can't talk to anyone there about it.“

Rhys grinned. “That's kinda ironic.“

“What?“ Gwen asked, surprised.

“I can't hear anything about your super-secret work but office gossip ...“ He raised his eyebrows. “... _that_ you can talk about with me.“

Gwen forced a smile.

“Listen,“ Rhys said, “it's mean. Tell her to stop it or call off the wedding.“

“It's not that easy. She loves her fiance.“

“Why did she do it then?“

“He understands her ...“ Gwen bit her lip. “She can't talk about her job with her fiance and everything got a bit too much recently.“

“When you got shot?“ Rhys asked.

Gwen nodded. “She didn't even want to do it, she was just going over to his flat to talk to him about the case, but … they drank and … were stupid.“

“So, it was just this once?“

“Yes,“ Gwen said.

“Okay. She should stop it then and not tell her fiance.“

“You think?“ she asked, surprised.

“Yeah. Better that way.“

A small, jealous part of her wondered if Rhys had cheated on her – for one night only – and just didn't tell her. A bigger part of her was just plain relieved.

“Yeah,“ she said. “I guess you're right.“


	8. Chapter 8

**7.**

 

Ianto left the archives around nine pm and when he entered the main Hub, the work stations were abandoned and the lights turned down low. He faintly remembered Tosh telling him that Jack had sent all of them home, but he hadn't been tired, and then he'd fallen asleep at his desk. 

He massaged his aching head and stopped when Myfanwy screeched and landed near him, looking at him expectantly. She waddled closer, not as elegant on solid ground as she was in the air, and purred softly. She rubbed her beak against Ianto's leg. 

Ianto frowned. “What's the matter?“

She purred again. Normally, she only acted like this while waiting for her meals, but she should have gotten her evening ration hours ago. Sometimes, she begged for chocolate while Jack and Ianto were working late in Jack's office, but this was different.

Ianto looked at Jack's office and could just make him out in the dim light of his desktop lamp. Ianto touched Myfanwy's beak and headed for the office. He stopped in the doorway. Jack was sitting in his chair, glaring at a glass of scotch in his hand. 

“Sir?“ Ianto asked cautiously.

Jack raised his head. “Ianto,“ he answered. “I sent everybody home.“

“I preferred to work for a bit,“ Ianto said, stepping closer. The decanter was standing on the table – empty. Ianto remembered topping it up just before they'd left for the Brecon Beacons. Normally, it took Jack months to empty it. He didn't drink often and when he did, not more than one glass. Even when they were in a pub, he stuck to one beer and then ordered water.

Jack nodded. “In the archives.“ He looked pointedly at his computer screen and when Ianto stepped a bit around the desk, he saw the image of his working place on the depths of the Hub, framed by shelves and file cabinets. Jack had watched him. In one way, the thought was less than calming, but his worry about Jack was bigger. Something was off. Jack seemed to be taking Tosh's inability to fix the manipulator harder than he'd let on.

Myfanwy poked Ianto's leg to remind him of his original reason for seeing Jack. 

He cleared his throat. “Myfanwy's acting strange. Did you feed her?“

“I guess I forgot,“ Jack answered, uninterested.

Ianto frowned. It wasn't like Jack to forget Myfanwy. Even though it was normally Ianto's task to feed her, Jack loved their pteranodon.

An uncomfortable silence embraced them, until Jack said, “I'm not like you, Ianto. So neat and punctual.“ 

It sounded like an insult. Or maybe Ianto just thought that way because in his darkest hours, he hated that characteristic about himself. Then, he didn't want to be the reliable one, the one who always thought of everything the others forgot. He liked his job, he liked being needed, but sometimes … self-doubt struck – was he doing too much? Was he letting others taking advantage of him? – and then he wanted to cut _it_ out of his body … 

Jack emptied his glass and grabbed the decanter. When he saw that it was empty, he groaned. “I don't have mental to-do lists. I forget things.“

Ianto swallowed. “That's alright, sir.“

“Yeah,“ Jack laughed. He got up, swayed and sat on his desk. “It's my fault, you know?“ 

“What is?“ Ianto asked, glad that Jack started another topic – glad to get distracted from his own thoughts.

"Matthew vanishing. I was gone a lot of the time, looking for the Doctor or in other countries on Torchwood business. If I had been here ...“

"I don't think that would have changed things, sir.“

"He's somewhere in this base, has been for seventy years, and nobody's found him.“

"We will find him and if the manipulator can't help us, we'll find another way.“ He stepped closer to Jack. "Before, nobody knew that Matthew was still here. Now we know and we can try to look for a solution. We'll find a way.“

"Seventy years,“ Jack said and his eyes seemed to glaze over. "Trapped in some device. Forgotten.“ He swallowed and tears shone in his eyes.

Ianto touched his cheek. "We'll help him.“ He intended to turn away to clean up the glass and the bottle, but Jack grabbed his upper arm, stopping him. Ianto winced when Jack's fingers deepened a bruise the cannibals had left on his skin.

"Would you have done it?“ Jack's eyes were fevered.

Ianto wondered if maybe he'd consumed more than alcohol.

"I don't understand.“

Jack got up. "Lisa and the conversion unit – would you have kept her in there for years if you had to? Do you think she would have wanted that if she wouldn't have been taken over by that thing?“

Ianto took a step backwards. "Jack-"

"Maybe her consciousness was still there, suppressed by that cyber being. She must have felt like Matthew ... not able to defend herself against the cyber being ... against you.“

Ianto turned away.

Jack's fingers gripped his wrist and turned him back around to cradle his head against Jack's shoulder with one hand in Ianto's nape. The other arm wrapped tightly around his waist. "That was a cruel thing to say.“ He kissed Ianto chastely. "Sorry.“

Ianto nodded. Jack kissed him again and pulled him closer, his hand sliding from Ianto's nape to the side of his neck, his thumb under Ianto's chin. Ianto felt Jack's tongue pushing against his lips and opened his mouth. Jack tasted like scotch and a bit like coffee. The kiss was passionate and desperate and his hands started to loosen Ianto's tie. Ianto hesitated for a moment, but then he pushed Jack's braces off his shoulders. Jack seemed to take that as a signal, because he leaned back against the desk and spread his legs, placed Ianto in-between them and pushed his hands under Ianto's jacket. Jack's fingers landed on Ianto's hips, made a detour to Ianto's arse and then back to the front to un-tuck the shirt. His hands were cold against Ianto's over-heated skin and he gasped softly.

For a moment, he wondered if was doing the right thing. Jack was obviously drunk and he was longing for something – someone – Ianto couldn't be, but Ianto's hands were already unbuttoning Jack's shirt, his lips were dropping gasping kisses on Jack's neck and he felt Jack's hand trying to undo his trousers. Nothing else mattered. He wanted this and Jack had offered even before the Brecon Beacons and before the hope of finding Matthew had been woken. Maybe it wasn't exactly what Ianto would like to have with Jack, but it was enough.

Ianto was just about to open Jack's trousers when the phone rang.

Jack made a reluctant noise and held onto Ianto when he tried to step away. He pulled Ianto closer again and one of Ianto's legs pressed against the hardness in Jack's trousers.

Ianto heard the phone ring and felt Jack's hands on his skin, inside his underwear by now, but he knew their priorities and took a step backwards. He looked up at Jack. "You have to,“ he whispered.

Jack grimaced, but he reached for the phone. "Harkness." He listened for a moment, then he said, "Yeah, I'll meet you there.“ He rang off and started to button up his shirt. "Owen chose the wrong time to become responsible."

"Where is he?“

"Out on the town. He was on his way to his car with a young lady and saw three Weevils crossing the street. Too many to take at once and he hasn't got his gun with him. They are in the city center. We can't let them go.“

“Can you even drive?“ Ianto asked. 

Jack pulled on his coat and opened a drawer. He shook a green pill from a small can and popped it. “Got those from way back,“ he said with a wink, but it was still sad. “I'll be sober in about five minutes.“ He dropped a kiss on Ianto's lips. His fingers zipped Ianto's trousers. “Go home. Take a cab. You're exhausted. We'll finish this some other time.“

Ianto touched Jack's cheek. “Are you okay?“

“No,“ Jack answered. He put his head on Ianto's shoulder, burying his nose in the bend of Ianto's neck to breathe him in, then he raised his head. “But I will be. It's just … one of those things I can't change.“

“We'll find a way,“ Ianto said.

Jack nodded, but his face betrayed his doubt. “I'll see you tomorrow.“

“Alright.“

Jack hurried out of his office. Ianto sighed deeply and leaned back against the desk. 

Myfanwy made a loud, very unhappy noise and Ianto rolled his eyes. ”Yes, alright.”

***

_It was a list. Neat handwriting on white paper. Next to it, the same list. Next to that, again the same. Next to this … Ianto's mother, her head propped up in one hand and her pen poised. She was writing the same list anew._

_Ianto climbed on the kitchen chair and watched her. The letters made no sense to him – yet. He'd start school this summer and then, finally, he would know what his mom was writing. He could still see that it was always the same words on the paper. Everything looked similar._

_“Why are you writing the same again?“ he asked._

_“Things have to be done in a neat way, Ianto.“_

_The lists were perfect as far as he was concerned, but his mother was never happy with them._

_Bored, he asked, “When are we going to go shopping?“_

_“When I'm done.“ She looked at him. “Did you clean up your room?“_

_Ianto nodded._

_“The stuffed toys on the bed, the books in the shelves, the toys in the box?“_

_Ianto nodded again._

_“I'll have a look later,“ she said._

_“You don't have to,“ Ianto answered._

_“You never do it right,“ his mother said. “I just want to make sure.“ She stared at the list, then she tore another paper from the pad and began anew._

_Ianto slid off the chair and went upstairs to his room. The door was closed. He frowned. He never closed the door. His mother didn't like him doing it. He put one hand on the doorknob and entered … a room in a basement, the conversion unit, Lisa._

_Startled, Ianto gasped and hurried to her side._

_She stared at him with tears in her eyes. “Get me out of here, Ianto.”_

_“I can't,” he answered. “You could die.”_

_“I don't want to be here!” She turned her head away. “Why are you doing this?”_

_Another woman asked, “Why?”_

_Ianto's hands tightened around the cold metal of the conversion unit. Slowly, he raised his head and saw another conversion unit beside Lisa's and strapped into it, his mother._

_“Why are you keeping me here?” she asked. “Ianto ...”_

_“Ianto …,” Lisa whispered. “Don't do this to me.”_

… Ianto opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling of his bedroom. He sat up to perch on the edge of the bed, his breath coming in gulping gasps. He felt sick. He switched on his bedside table lamp and took a few deep breaths. It had been a long time since he'd thought of his mother.

He looked at his watch. He'd gone to sleep an hour ago. Now, he felt wide awake and restless, unable to lie down again. He wiped his eyes with a trembling hand and got up to head for his living room. He could use the time to do some work for Jack on his computer.


	9. Chapter 9

**8.**

 

When Owen arrived at Ianto's flat, Ianto seemed to have been awake for quite a while. Owen felt as if only his promise to give Ianto a lift to the Hub had stopped him from getting a cab and going to work by himself. He was already in his suit trousers and shirt, but he'd waited with putting on his tie and jacket since he knew that Owen would want to have a look at his chest. The examination was done in the bedroom, where Ianto was able to stretch out on the bed.

Ianto's chest looked bad. The skin was mottled with bruises and scratches. Nevertheless, he did look better than a few days ago.

When Owen's hands prodded a painful bruise, Ianto flinched. Owen muttered, “Sorry.“ 

Ianto made a sound that could have meant anything.

Owen looked at him. “You alright?“

Ianto stared at the ceiling and nodded. “Just tired.“

Owen got the Bekaran scanner from his bag and waved it over Ianto's chest. “Woke up too early?“

“Yes,“ Ianto answered.

The scanner revealed its result and he frowned. “Your blood sugar's alarmingly low. When was the last time you ate?”

“Yesterday, lunch.“

Owen didn't know what made him angrier: That the answer had come so fast or its implications. He stared at Ianto furiously. “Damn it, Ianto-“

“I'm not very hungry at the moment.“

“You know what this thing tells me?“ Owen asked, holding up the scanner. He didn’t wait for Ianto's answer. “You are not eating enough, you're too light and you're not sleeping enough ...“ Owen forced himself to calm down. Harsh words weren't good, because Ianto tended to clam up and that was the last thing that Owen wanted right now. Calmer, he asked, “What's wrong? I mean, aside from the obvious.“

Ianto avoided his eyes, staring out the window. He didn't answer.

“Ianto-“ 

“I failed in the Brecon Beacons, right?“

For a moment, Owen was dumbstruck by the change in topic, then he cleared his throat. “You know, you really were … Ianto, it was your first field mission and it was heavy. I wouldn't call it failing.“

“But I wasn't good enough and keeping Lisa in that conversion unit wasn't good, either. I should have known that the cyber being had control over her. Lisa had no way to defend herself. I'm just as guilty as that monster that took her from me.“

Owen didn't answer. He didn't know what to say, Lisa was still a sore spot in his relationship with Ianto. He still hadn't been able to forgive him fully.

Ianto seemed to have given up waiting for an answer, because he shook his head and laughed coldly. “You were right. Jack should have got rid of me.“

“Ianto,“ Owen snapped, harsh, because that man sitting on the bed couldn't be his colleague. This tired person that kept counting their mistakes, breaking apart, couldn't be Ianto Jones. Ianto Jones was a man who had his faults, but he was learning from them and getting on with his life, who was self-confident and strong. This faded copy of him was wrong. “Ianto,” he repeated gently, “you're exhausted. You'll see that everything will seem a bit better as soon as you got some rest.”

Ianto laughed, but it sounded forced. “That's what my sister told me every time we left the clinic,” he muttered. 

Owen frowned. “What-”

“She was wrong,” Ianto said. “Every single time.” He got up and passed by Owen into his en-suite. The lock clicked into place.

Owen stared at the closed door, then he sighed and packed away his scanner. “I'll wait in the car!“ he said loudly and left the flat.

Once in the car, he switched on the radio and closed his eyes. He tried to relax, but he couldn't.

The car door opened and Owen startled. Ianto dropped into the passenger seat and stared out the window.

Owen cleared his throat and turned down the radio. “We'll get breakfast on the way to work,“ he suggested.

Ianto barely looked at him, but nevertheless, Owen could see that his eyes were red.

“Okay,“ he said.

***

Late in the afternoon, Gwen hurried into Jack's office. “He's back.“

Jack frowned and opened the CCTV for the Plass. And there was Ben Bryan, standing in front of the water tower reaching down into the Hub. He was staring at the camera.

“Insistent guy,“ Jack said thoughtfully.

“He knows that we're here,“ Gwen answered. “He has no idea how to come down here, but he knows that there's something here or at least that we can see him.“

Jack had to give a nod. He sighed deeply, hating the decision he had to make now. Jack got up and took his coat.

Gwen looked at him, alarmed. “What are you going to do?“

“I'll talk to him, then I'll bring him down here.“

“Jack,“ she protested, “you can't do that.“

“Rumors are one thing,“ Jack explained, pulling on his coat. “There are enough of those about us in the city, but this guy's getting too close for comfort and he won't give up until he finds something worthwhile. We have to neutralize him.“

“Like you tried to neutralize me?“

“Yes,“ Jack answered. He could see that Gwen didn't like his answer and sighed deeply. “Cardiff is not ready for the truth and think about it, Gwen, a story like this would raise flags all around the world. Humankind won't understand this, yet.“

“And nobody will notice that his memories are missing?“ she asked skeptically and crossed her arms.

Jack loved her stubbornness, but sometimes, it was too much. “We'll think of something,“ he said.

“Sure,“ Gwen answered bitterly. Jack could see that she was reluctant and heading for a sulk, and started to worry about his plans to retcon Ben Bryan. If he brought him down here and Gwen should manage to warn him somehow … he needed his team on his side.

Jack put his hands on his hips. “Is there something you want to tell me?“

“I can't believe you're doing this, Jack. He's got nothing on us. He's harmless.“

“He's got Ianto,“ Jack answered. “I should have ended it after he found the tourist office. I just didn't think that he would try again after Ianto sent him away. The others gave up.“

“Because he's Ben Bryan,“ Gwen answered. “That's his charm. That's why he's so good at what he does.“

“Well, he won't be this time,“ Jack explained and entered the main Hub. He looked for Ianto, but couldn't see him. Only Tosh and Owen were present, working at their computers. “Owen,“ he said. 

He looked up from his screen, a bit startled. “Yeah?“ he answered.

“Where's Ianto?“

Owen sighed. “In the archives, I think.“

Jack activated his comm. “Ianto.“

It took a moment, but then he answered, _“Sir?“_

“I'll be bringing a guest into the Hub.“

_“Ben Bryan?“_

“Yeah. Do me a favor and make coffee for us all. Spike the one for Mr. Bryan.“

_“Yes, sir.“_

Jack caught Tosh and Owen's eyes. They nodded their understanding.

Gwen stepped closer to him, her arms still crossed in challenge. “This is not right, Jack.“

“It's easy, Gwen,“ he answered, staring at her. “I'm the boss. I call the shots.“

“You won't just eliminate memories of his research, but everything that happened in that time. Things he experienced with his girlfriend, with his family and friends. Important things.“

Jack headed for the cogwheel door.

“You can't tell me what is wrong and right, Jack!“ Gwen called after him.

Jack turned around to her. “Should I see you warn Bryan in some way, Gwen, I will give you both Retcon – the hard way.“ With that he left the Hub, Gwen's shocked face following him into the elevator that led up to the tourist office. He could understand her, even more so, since he himself was missing the memories of two years of his life he would never get back. But he had a responsibility and Ben Bryan was a threat. Threats had to be neutralized.

***

Ianto pressed his back against the cold concrete wall of the archives and took a deep breath. Here, hidden between two of the many high shelves reigning the huge room, he was safe from the eyes of the CCTV. The bulb of the lamp above him wouldn't stop flickering, making it darker here than it normally was. Ianto swallowed and breathed in again before he wiped his face. Jack's words from the evening before followed by that nightmare had brought all kinds of bad memories to the surface that had cut deeper than he wanted to admit. They'd hit something deep within him and even though Jack had apologized, Ianto couldn't forget them. Maybe he had tortured Lisa. Maybe she had spent the last few weeks of her life hating him while the cyber woman had tried to convince him otherwise. He felt sick at the thought and he'd hoped, in vain, that he would be able to spend the afternoon down here, alone. 

He shook off the desire to just hide here and only come out when he felt better and instead took a few deep breaths to steady himself. He'd filled out a new request to be transferred to the position of General Support. It was lying on his desk, waiting for him to take to Jack's office. He didn't want to go back into the field. He was useless out there.

This – the archives – was his place.

***

Tosh looked into the small mirror in the bathroom and tugged on a recalcitrant strand of hair. A few tries later, she gave up and left the room.

On her way back to her desk she passed Owen's and something on one of his screens caught her attention. She stopped and stepped closer. Owen, immersed in his work, hadn't noticed her. He kept reading and making notes, chewing on his pen and jiggling his leg. 

The screen showed a medical file from the early 90s, but it couldn't belong to a current investigation, since Tosh knew them all. It was the file of a woman who was looking at her from a photograph on the other screen. She was pretty: Blonde, long hair cascading down over her shoulders and bright blue eyes … she knew those eyes.

The name: Mabyn Jones.

“Ianto's mother?“ she asked.

Owen startled. Hastily, he switched off the screen displaying the file. “Why do you always sneak up on me?“ he asked, closing the window with the photograph on the other screen, too. He turned his chair around to Tosh and crossed his arms.

Tosh frowned. “What are you doing looking up Ianto's mother?“

“Jones is a popular name. Who says it's Ianto's mother?“ Owen asked with raised eyebrows.

Tosh shook her head. “Please, Owen.“

He sighed deeply and rolled his eyes. Then he got up and looked around as if he was afraid of someone eavesdropping, but Gwen was sitting at her desk, talking to Rhys on the phone. They were as alone as one could be in the Torchwood main Hub.

Softly, Owen said, “Ianto said something back at his flat, about his family ...“ 

Tosh stared at him expectantly and was surprised to see him blush. She smiled. ”So, you were curious?”

”I wish I hadn't been.”

“Why?“ Tosh asked.

“His father was healthy, but his mother ...“ Owen lowered his voice even more, “Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder, depression ...“

“That's horrible,“ Tosh muttered, shocked.

Owen nodded. “That explains where his obsession for organization comes from. His mother raised him that way. OCPD means that you're focused on order, organization and perfection. It can cause depression.“ He sighed. “You know, he and I may just have a bit more in common than I thought.” His eyes searched out hers, a bit startled, as if he hadn't intended to say that out loud. He seemed to accept, though, that it was too late now and shrugged casually. “A shitty childhood.”

Tosh didn't know what to say to that. She'd had a great childhood, loving parents, her grandmother and other relatives.

Owen turned away from her and sat down again, then he opened Facebook and stared at the screen. Tosh knew that she was dismissed.

She felt guilty for asking, but she couldn't stop herself. “What happened to his mother?“

Owen sighed and cleared his throat. “Her depression became worse. She was committed to a psychiatric clinic. A few years later, she committed suicide.“ 

Tosh watched Ianto heading for the coffee machine and getting some mugs ready.

She sighed deeply. “I feel so sorry for him.“

“Yes,“ Owen said.


	10. Chapter 10

**9.**

 

Ben Bryan was sitting on the steps leading down into the oval basin of Roald Dahl Plass, leafing through a notebook. Jack had spent the last few minutes watching him and decided that now was a good time to enter Ben's life.

He sauntered through the bustling venue and sat down next to him. The journalist only gave him a quick, puzzled glance out of the corner of his eye. It was obvious that he had no idea what Jack looked like. That was at least something. 

Jack cleared his throat. “Looks like rain.“

Ben glanced at him, then up towards the gray sky. “Yes, but I guess that's just Wales.“

“Yeah,“ Jack said. “Did you bring your umbrella?“

Ben froze. “No.“ The answer sounded rather irritated.

“Me neither, but I don't have a problem. I'll return to work in a minute. You, on the other hand, intend to spend your whole afternoon sitting here, am I right?“

Ben looked at him properly now and there was mistrust mirrored in his bright eyes. “Why should you care?“

“Why should you care about Torchwood, Mr. Bryan?“

Startled, Ben got up and took a step back. For a moment, Jack thought that he would fall down the steps, but Ben caught himself just in time. Almost accusatory, he pointed his pen at Jack. “Who are you?“

Jack got up, too, and put his hands on his hips. “Captain Jack Harkness.“

“You're … you're Harkness?“ Ben asked, aghast.

“Yeah,“ Jack answered with a grin, then he turned serious, “and I don't like you stalking my team.“

“It got your attention,“ Ben said with a shrug. He seemed to get a grip and now acted emphatically casual. “So I won't apologize.“

“Headstrong and cute … my favorite combination.“

Ben didn't say anything for a moment, then he seemed to find his professionalism. He readied his pen and opened an empty page in his notebook. “One interview, Captain Harkness. That's all I want.“

“I don't give interviews.“

“I'm not your enemy,“ Ben explained. “I just want to know the truth. The tax payers' money is going into your organization, I just want to know what it is you do.“

“I prefer the word 'institute'. It's on our letterheads, too: Torchwood Institute.“

“You have letterheads?“

Jack just grinned.

Ben scribbled something down. “So, I assume that you're taking direct orders from the government? The prime minister? Maybe even the royal family?“

Jack shook his head, smiling about Ben's enthusiasm. “I don't give interviews.“

“Come on, captain,“ Ben said. “You have to give me something! I know what some people say about me, but I swear that I'm fair. If I think that your institute is useful, then I'll write it in my article.“

“I don't give interviews,“ Jack repeated, “but as it happens, I have some time on my hands to give the grand tour.“ He winked at Ben. “Just you and me.“

Ben's eyes glittered triumphantly. “A tour? Through your base? I'd be happy to accept.“

Jack nodded at him and headed towards the invisible lift. 

Ben followed him. “Can I take pictures?“

“If you promise me to catch my good side. If you have no idea which side that is, I can show you,“ Jack answered.

“That's the third time that you've tried to hit on me, captain. Is it difficult for a man like you to be the leader of a team that seems to partake in dangerous missions? Are there any prejudices you have to face?“

“I've had no complaints,“ Jack answered. He and Ben stepped onto the lift. With a wink, he added, “I happen to be a great lover.“

***

Jack was down in the deep recesses of the Hub, showing Ben around. Ianto assumed that he had twenty minutes until they would return and set about to prepare coffee for Gwen, Owen and Tosh. When he stopped, tray with mugs in his hands, next to the couch where the three of them were sitting Owen said, “Seriously, he could make the effort and first introduce the team before starting the tour. That would be a bit more polite.“

Tosh nodded. She smiled at Ianto when he handed over her coffee.

“Right,“ Gwen said. “When I met you for real the first time, he did the tour first and introductions second.“

“Why?“ Owen asked. Ianto handed him his mug and was surprised when Owen looked up at him and asked, “You okay?“

“Yes,“ he answered automatically even though he still felt as if he could spend the rest of his life hidden away in the archives. Gwen looked surprised by Owen's open concern, but she didn't say anything, instead thanking Ianto for her coffee.

Owen asked, “No problems with the ribs? How's the headache?“

“They hurt,“ Ianto answered, “but it's endurable. The headaches come and go. The pills help.“

“Of course they do,“ Owen answered. “I created them.“

Ianto nodded at him and returned to the coffee machine. It was located in a corner of the main Hub, set up in a kitchen niche. 

When Ianto had started working for Torchwood Three, Jack had mentioned once that they'd tried to establish a kitchen duty rota years back, but that it had never quite worked out. The overfilled dishwasher had been all the proof Ianto needed. He'd taken the responsibility for the kitchen niche in the main Hub and the coffee machine next to the boardroom. Ever since then, the team didn't have to worry about looking for clean mugs.

Ianto was just starting to prepare Jack and Ben's coffee, when they returned from their tour. 

“Alright!“ Jack called, heading for his office with Ben. “Please join us in my office, everyone.“

Owen, Tosh and Gwen obeyed. Ianto leaned against the counter while Jack's coffee brewed and sighed deeply. 

“Ianto?“ 

He startled out of his thoughts and looked at Gwen, who had placed a hand on his shoulder. Worried, she frowned. “Are you okay? You seem kinda exhausted.“

“I'm fine,“ he answered, forcing a smile. He turned away to get Gwen to remove her hand. “Just thinking.“ He could see that Gwen didn't quite believe him, but she didn't push him. She waited until Ben's coffee was done – Retcon swirling in it –, then she followed him to Jack's office.

Jack was sitting at his desk, Ben in a chair opposite him, while Owen and Tosh were leaning against the wall. 

Jack was just explaining, “It was founded by Queen Victoria.“ He smiled when Ianto and Gwen entered. “Ah, Ianto Jones.“ He winked at Ben. “He's keeping this Hub together, but don't tell him or he'll want a raise.“

Ianto put Ben's coffee down and handed Jack his. “I know just how unsuccessful such a request would be, sir.“ 

Jack looked at Ben again. “He calls me 'sir.' That's the best thing about him.“ Beneath the broad grin and the twinkling eyes, Ianto could see sorrow gathering. The new loss of Matthew must have cut deep, but Jack wasn't the kind of guy to let anyone see that.

Jack casually folded his hands behind his head and Ianto went to stand a step behind him.

Ben nodded at Ianto. “We already met.“

“He's the best when it comes to coffee,“ Jack explained. “Don't miss out on it.“

Ben nodded, but he didn't reach for his mug. Ianto thought that he heard a soft whistling and looked around, puzzled.

Ben made some notes. “You catch aliens. Are you using their technology, too?“

“As far as we can,“ Jack answered.

Ben turned to Owen. “What about medicines?“

“I'm working on it,“ Owen said with a nod. “Of course, there are many interesting technologies we come across, and I already use some of them. But nothing's useful enough for the mass market, yet.“

The whistling stopped and Ianto breathed a sigh of relief. Something beeped. Surprised, he registered Tosh looking in his direction, frowning and rubbing her forehead.

Gwen stepped closer and asked softly, “Do you hear that?“

Ianto nodded, relieved that he wasn't hallucinating, but also worried. Jack seemed to have heard it too now, because he lowered his arms and opened his vortex manipulator. The beeping got louder and Owen and Ben stopped their conversation.

“What's that?“ Ben asked.

Jack stared at the small screen in concentration, then he jumped out of his chair. “You have to ...“

All noises ceased, Ianto was ripped off his feet and everything went black.

***

Jack opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling of his office. His head hurt and he pushed the heel of his hand against his forehead while he took stock of his body. He could move his arms and legs, his chest was still there and so was his head. He hadn't died, merely lost consciousness.

Carefully, he sat up. Ianto was lying next to him, motionless, eyes closed. Jack leaned over him and took his pulse, then he brushed a hand through his hair. “Ianto.“ He made a soothing noise when Ianto flinched and sat up abruptly. Ianto moaned and closed his eyes. Jack pulled a face. “Headache?“

Ianto nodded carefully. “What happened?“

“I'm about to find out.“ Jack got up and saw that everyone was lying on the floor, unconscious. He stepped around his desk to reach Gwen. She woke up when he touched her, so he went on to Ben. 

Owen woke up on his own. “What the bloody hell …?“ he asked hoarsely. Ianto was crouching next to Tosh by now, who was sitting slumped against the wall.

Ben stared at Jack in shock. “What just happened?“

“I'm not sure yet,“ Jack answered.

Ianto said, “Owen.“ 

Jack looked at him and froze when Ianto raised one hand – it was smeared with blood. Owen didn't seem to trust his legs quite that much, yet, so he crawled over to Tosh to examine her. Jack helped Ben to gain his footing.

Ben asked, “Was it some kind of explosion?“

Jack's eyes found the main Hub and he froze. There were three desks instead of two where Owen and Tosh's work stations were. On them, there were typewriters and ink bottles, fountain pens and piles of paper. The water tower was gone. It would take a long time until someone even thought about creating it. There was no basin, instead, a huge work table took up residence where the tower had been. Jack turned around to look in one corner of his office. There was a desk. Orderly and abandoned.

“Everything's changed,“ Ben said, standing next to him. Jack checked his vortex manipulator, while Ben asked, “Are those typewriters?“

“Nothing exploded,“ he answered Ben's original question. “It was a time shift.“

Ianto stopped next to Jack. “To where?“ he asked.

Jack swallowed. “1933.“


	11. Chapter 11

**10.**

 

Jack turned to his team. By now, Tosh was sitting up against the wall, grimacing when Owen pushed a tissue against the back of her head. Jack hurried to help her stand up and wrapped an arm around her waist when she stumbled. “We have to leave.“

“Where to?“ Gwen asked.

“Doesn't matter.“ Jack looked back at the main Hub. “Who knows how long it'll be until they'll come back. They can't see you.“

“Who?“ Ben asked, confused.

“The team,“ Jack answered. He headed for the office door with Tosh. The others followed him.

Gwen sped up to walk beside him. “Jack, how is this possible?“

“I'll explain later,“ he answered and stopped, thinking. He was wondering where they could hide. Before he could make a decision, somewhere above them, a door slammed shut. The door leading to the surface. It was made of metal, very heavy and it could be heard down in the main Hub. The door led from the room that would later become the tourist office down a long flight of stairs into the Hub. The huge cogwheel door hadn't been installed yet. Their only protection against someone finding out about the base was a padlock.

Jack stared at the entrance. “They're coming,“ he said, hurrying with Tosh towards the corridor between the office and the med bay. He handed Tosh over to Owen and was surprised when Ben supported Tosh's other side. “The second room to the left. I'll catch up as soon as I can.“

Owen, Ben and Tosh headed down the corridor.

Gwen and Ianto hesitated. Ianto asked, “What about you?“

“I'll get some things from the med bay to help Owen treat Tosh. I'll be with you in a minute. Now, go!“

Ianto nodded and hurried to catch up with the others.

Gwen grabbed Jack's arm. “What'll happen if they see you?“

“They know me. If I'm not mistaken, my current Me is in Scotland. I'll just tell them that I could return early.“ He pushed her towards the corridor. “I'll explain later. Go!“

She obeyed and ran after the others. Jack hurried to the med bay and stuffed bandages and a vial of alcohol into his pockets. Then he ascended the steps again … and saw ghosts. They were standing near the entrance, talking quietly.

Eveline Mason, the team's doctor, noticed him first. “Jack.“ She hurried towards him.

The other two, James Lees and Constantine Jane, were staring at Jack in surprise. Jack forced a charming smile.

Eveline smiled back and hugged him. “It's good to see you. I missed you.“

He returned the hug gently. “Missed you, too.“ He pushed her away to have a proper look. Eveline was a beautiful woman with brown, long hair that framed a fine, pretty face. She looked up at him with big, green eyes. She'd been married, but her husband had died three years ago from a disease. She kept wearing the wedding band, though, and Jack recalled that she had never taken another husband, and died within a year. She hadn't lacked offers, though. And rightly. She was smart and independent, but also a good wife and a woman well-known in the upper class of London.

Jack couldn't get over the fact that she was standing right in front of him. Eveline had always been a friend. He remembered all the social gatherings, now, that he'd accompanied her to after the death of her husband so that she didn't have to go alone. He would have loved to see her starting a family of her own.

Jack dropped a kiss on her forehead. “You look great as always. Is that blouse new?“

Eveline tugged at it, blushing, and shook her head. “Stop it, Jack.“

He grinned at the two men. “Just telling the truth, right, guys?“

Constantine Jane was a tall man with sharp features and gray eyes. He wore a dark coat and, upon hearing Jack’s words, curled his lips into a smile. “For once, yes.“ He shoved his hands into the pockets of his trousers. “It doesn't happen all that often, though.“

James Lees, a man of slight build with blonde hair, the team's technician, crossed his arms. “I told you that you look fantastic, Eve. You wouldn't believe me.“ His dark eyes met Jack's and he winked at him. Just like Constantine, he was wearing straight-cut trousers and a white shirt under a tight jacket. Unlike Constantine, the clothes made him younger, maybe because of the freckles on his cheeks and around his nose.

Jack didn't know if it was him being nervous or the others, but a tense silence descended around them. Then he remembered that Matthew had gone missing a couple of days ago and they didn't know that he knew about that yet. Eveline's eyes were sad and James and Constantine seemed awkward. Jack assumed that they were wondering how to tell him. Suddenly, he felt exhausted; he didn't want to hear the words, not yet, not again.

“It was an exhausting trip,“ he said. “I think I'm going to go and sleep for a bit.“

“Alright,“ Constantine said, sounding almost relieved. “Yes. We … we have some things to talk through without you either way.“

Jack nodded at them and hurried into the dark recesses of the Hub. He heard James asking, “How are we going to tell him?“ Then his steps drowned out the voices.

***

Ianto was standing near the door, his arms crossed, leaning against the wall and watching Owen try to treat Tosh in the dim light of the only lamp. The walls were adorned by shelves, all of them empty. It seemed as if the room should be a storage area, but it wasn't in use.

Gwen was walking up and down nervously, while Ben was crouching in a corner and trying to work out what he'd gotten himself into. Ianto thought that he was handling the situation well enough, all things considered.

For the third time, he said, “We're in the 30s.“

“Yes,“ Ianto answered.

“How did we get here?“

Gwen shrugged. “Jack said he'll explain.“

“He's talking to them,“ Ben said. “Why? I mean, they can't know him.“

Ianto bit his lip. Gwen looked at him, her eyebrows raised questioningly.

Owen laughed. “Don't worry about that. Everything will become clearer in time. Believe me, tomorrow, all this will be a whacky dream.“

“So, we'll get back home?“ Ben asked.

“Of course,“ Ianto answered soothingly. He wasn't sure.

“Good,“ Ben said and laughed hysterically. “I promised my girlfriend I'd be home for dinner.“

Owen rolled his eyes. “On the bright side, you have seventy years to fulfill that promise.“

“What if we never get home?“ Ben asked.

“We will,“ Gwen tried to soothe him.

The door opened and Jack entered.

Gwen immediately turned her attention on him. “Right, Jack? We'll get back home in no time.“

Jack's eyes settled on Ben for a second and he seemed to get Gwen's underlying meaning. “Of course.“ He handed Owen a bandage and a vial. “Sorry, that was the best I could grab that fast.“

“It's enough,“ Owen answered. “The wound's only superficial. I think she was thrown against the wall.“

“You could always ask me. I'm not unconscious, you know,” Tosh complained.

Owen shrugged in apology and looked at her questioningly.

Tosh sighed. “I was thrown against the wall.“

Jack put a hand on Tosh's cheek and smiled encouragingly.

Gwen looked determined. “What happened there, Jack?“

“If you don't have any objections, I'd like to relocate to a more secure room to discuss this. I know a place not far from here that's not used at the moment. There's a bed there, too. Tosh could have a lie-down.“ He looked at Ianto. “You too.“

“I'm fine,“ Ianto answered, irritated.

Jack stepped closer and put a hand on his shoulder. “Don't tell me that you're not in pain.“

Ianto was in pain, but it would leave as soon as his ribs and head had some time to recover. He didn't think that his wounds had been aggravated. Instead, he was worried about his own responsibility in what had happened. If he had reacted sooner to the noise, then all that wouldn't have happened – whatever _all that_ was. He was pretty sure he'd been the first to hear it and just because he'd been too tired and wrapped up in his own problems, he hadn't reacted, putting the others in danger.

Owen dabbed Tosh's wound with alcohol and she flinched and made a soft, pained noise. Owen pulled a face. “Sorry.“

“It's okay.“

Jack looked around at each of them. “We should go.“

Owen nodded. “Yeah. I'm done.“ He helped Tosh to her feet and pocketed the used bandage and the vial. Then they left the room and followed Jack deeper into the recesses of the Hub.

Jack smiled at Ianto. “Luckily they didn't have CCTV back then.“ He rounded another corner and opened the first door to enter a dark room. When Jack closed the door, it was pitch black for a moment, then something clicked and a weak light flickered on. Surprised, Ianto registered a double bed in one corner of the room, a cradle, a small furnace and a table with a record player on it. A few books and records were leaning against the desk lamp. Behind the rocking chair in the corner, a standard lamp was placed.

No matter how bare the walls seemed and how dark the room was without a window, it was obviously an improvised flat.

Jack walked through the room systematically, switching on the lights one after another. The lamps weren't as bright as in the 21st century and didn't make the room more cozy, but it was obvious that Jack knew this room well. He stopped near the record player. 

Gwen sat down in the rocking chair. She smiled when it creaked in protest. “My grandmother used to have one of these. I loved it.“

Ianto stepped next to Jack. “Where are we?“

“This is my flat,“ Jack answered softly. Ianto looked at him questioningly. Jack shrugged and corrected, “It was my flat.“ He shoved his hands into his trouser pockets and stepped into the middle of the room to get the group's attention. “How's Tosh doing?“ he asked Owen who was sitting next to Tosh on the bed.

“It's not that bad,“ Owen answered and Tosh gifted Jack with a small smile and leaned back against the wall, her legs stretched out on the bed. Owen got comfortable beside her. Gwen wrapped herself in the blanket that had been draped over the back of the rocking chair. Ianto could understand, he felt a bit cold, too.

Jack sighed deeply and Ianto noticed that his shoulders tensed up. It was obvious that he was nervous about their reactions to his explanation.

“What happened, is called a Rift implosion. It's a simple time shift.“

Ben stared at Jack, aghast. “A _simple_ time shift … _Rift implosion_. That doesn't sound very reassuring.“

“It is,“ Jack answered.

“Torchwood,“ Gwen and Owen said at the same time and Tosh nodded at Ben.

While Jack explained the Rift to Ben, Ianto went to the cradle and brushed his thumb over the wood. This was where Jack and Matthew had lived with Michael.

He looked around again. A home beneath the surface. Improvised, as far as he knew. Nevertheless … even though this place was bleak, there was life here. Jack and Matthew had shared something more than sex. More than Jack shared with Ianto.

It shouldn't hurt, but it did. He'd known that Jack and Matthew had been in love, but to see the proof ...

Ben asked, “So, if that Rift manipulator is handled in the wrong way ...“

“... it goes boom,“ Owen answered with a nod.

Jack specified. “It would tear apart the veil between time lines. That's an explosion. An implosion doesn't change anything about the surroundings. It only takes people or things to another time. Every trip through the Rift is a controlled implosion. Only what happened with us wasn't controlled. It created a blast and that's why we lost consciousness.“ He looked at Ianto. “My office must look like hell.“

“Okay,“ Owen said, “but why?“

“I made a mistake,“ Jack answered. He held his arm up, showing his wristband. “I thought it wouldn't work, but it did. It just needed time to charge enough energy for the time travel. Apparently, the damage was too big to gather the needed energy in one go. The beeping we heard was a warning: Attention, time travel starting now.“

Gwen frowned. “But we know that it's 1933, because that's the last … address you typed in.“

Jack nodded. “This is 1933, approximately two days after Matthew went missing.“

“Can we get back?“ Tosh asked.

“Yeah,“ Owen said and leaned back. He pushed a pillow under his head. “Our trainee has to be home at seven.“

Ben glared at him.

Owen shrugged. “Couldn't resist.“

“It's got enough energy left to take us home,” Jack explained.

Tosh rubbed her forehead. “But it'll need time to recharge, right?“

Jack nodded. “When the time comes, we'll have to be together for it to go well. We'll have to be in the same room.“

Owen asked, “And 'til then? I mean, it took more than twelve hours the last time.“

Ianto corrected him, “Sixteen hours.“

Jack crossed his arms. “We hide down here. Nobody will come here, since Matthew's gone. My current Me won't return from Scotland for three more days. We're safe here. I'll try to find a blueprint of the Hub, just as I intended originally. Maybe there's still a possibility to help Matthew.“

Ben raised a hand. “I'm confused. Who's Matthew?“

“Long story,“ Owen answered.

“Well …,“ Ben said, “... we've got some time on our hands.“

Ianto noticed that the door was starting to open and put a warning hand on Jack's arm. Jack looked at him questioningly, then he turned around to the door. A young man in a wet coat entered, shivering, his dark hair plastered to his head.

He stopped abruptly when he noticed the people gathered around the room. He took a step back, crossing his arms as if he was cradling something to his chest protectively. Now Ianto noticed the bulge forming in his coat as if there was something hidden beneath to protect it from the rain. His green eyes found a familiar face and his mistrust left him. “Jack,“ he smiled. He opened the first two buttons on his coat and Ianto saw the sleepy face of a baby strapped to the chest in an improvised knot of sheets, curiously eying him. 

Ianto looked at Jack who was standing next to him, frozen. “Matthew.“


	12. Chapter 12

**11.**

 

“Who are those people?“ Matthew asked when Jack guided him out of the room and closed the door.

Jack took a deep breath, before turning around to Matthew, forcing a smile. “Friends. I'll explain later.“ Jack swallowed and looked down at Michael, who was still hidden in Matthew's coat. Matthew had his arms around him. Jack raised one hand, swallowed and then, with trembling fingers, brushed some strands of hair out of Matthew's forehead.

“You should have written a telegram, telling me that you'd be back early,“ Matthew said.

Jack laughed helplessly and put his hand on Matthew's nape. “It was kind of spontaneous.“ He pulled Matthew into an embrace and kissed his temple. Matthew smelled like rain and soap and his hair was moist, but he was warm and alive. Jack swallowed a sob, instead kissing Matthew. “I missed you,“ he whispered. Before Matthew was able to answer, Jack had pulled him into another kiss, his arms wrapped around Matthew's waist. He pushed his tongue into Matthew's mouth and pulled him close enough to almost squash the baby between their bodies. Matthew laughed softly and stepped back, turning his head away to kiss the corner of Jack's mouth. Then he dropped a last, short kiss on Jack's lips. Jack nuzzled Matthew's cheek and suddenly, everything fell into place and was just like back then, as if no time had passed. He whispered, “I love you.“

Matthew took a breath as he always did when Jack said the words, as if he couldn't believe someone having those feelings for him. “Love you, too,“ he muttered. His eyes avoided Jack's. He always was nervous when emotions were involved, Jack remembered. Matthew cleared his throat and freed Michael from his coat and the harness to hand him over to Jack. “He cried for three days after you left. I think he missed you, too.“

Jack kept the baby against his chest, sliding his fingers through the dark hair. He remembered just how Michael liked to be held and was surprised how fast he was reconnecting with the feeling of a small body in his arms. He'd held babies after Michael, but the last time had been so long ago. Michael laughed at him with the same big, green eyes as his father.

Jack shook his head, still aghast and overwhelmed, still in shock. “He's so small.“

Matthew smiled. “Actually, he's grown since the last time you saw him.“

Jack looked up at Matthew. All the things he'd blamed himself for after Matthew went missing, all the guilt of the last few decades found its peak and just tumbled out. Matthew had no idea what would happen to him. He didn't know just how much guilt Jack felt for what had happened to him.

Jack waited until Matthew looked at him, then he sad earnestly, “I'm sorry I wasn't here for Michael’s birth. I'm sorry that I was gone so much the last few months.“

Matthew frowned. “Jack ...“

“I'm so sorry.“

“It's okay.“ He caressed Jack's cheek and Jack realized all of a sudden that it was wet. Matthew seemed almost shocked. “Why are you crying?“

Jack breathed in deeply and wiped the tears away with one hand, forcing more down. “Matthew … I'm not who you think I am.“

***

“He will tell him, right?“ Gwen asked while Jack was outside talking to Matthew. Ben was standing in a corner of the room, leaning against the wall, arms crossed and staring at the floor, trying to work through what Gwen had told him about Jack's immortality. She didn't worry about him, though. He was coping surprisingly well with the events. 

Owen was still sitting on the bed with Tosh, playing _Solitaire_ on his mobile. “Well, he will have to tell him who we are.“

Tosh opened her eyes. “Only Matthew going missing, he can't tell him that part.“

Gwen shook her head. “I'm not sure he won't. Matthew means a lot to him.“

“But he can't risk history changing course.“

“But it already has,“ Gwen said. “I mean, we are here. That will change things.“

Ianto said softly, “Or not.“

Tosh, Owen and Gwen looked at him and Ianto seemed startled by the sudden attention, as if he hadn't wanted to say that out loud. “Maybe we have to be here,“ he explained. “Maybe our presence causes something to happen that's responsible for what happens to Matthew. Time travel's complicated.“

“What are you saying?“ Gwen asked. “That we're to blame for Matthew going missing?“

Ianto turned his head away and stared at the opposite wall. “Maybe.“

It was deathly silent, as if everyone was trying to figure out if they'd already done something to cause Matthew to disappear. Gwen watched Ianto staring at the wall, still as a statue. He wasn't the man she'd gotten to know the last few months. The Brecon Beacons had broken something within him that neither Canary Wharf nor Lisa or his suspension had been able to destroy.

“How did we even end up here?” Gwen asked. “Jack wanted to come here two days after Matthew went missing.”

“He said 'approximately'. Time travel's complicated,” Ianto answered. “Maybe the calculations were off.”

The door opened and Jack and Matthew returned – Matthew was carrying his coat and Jack was holding Michael. Gwen stared at him in surprise, Jack was cradling Michael as if he'd never done anything else in his life. She knew that Matthew and Jack had been close, but she'd never thought about the relationship between Jack and Michael.

Matthew seemed a bit intimidated and nervous. He hung up his coat and crossed his arms, seeking Jack's closeness. 

Jack smiled at him encouragingly. “This is Toshiko Sato, Owen Harper, Gwen Cooper and Ben Bryan,“ he said, before turning to look at Ianto and adding, “And Ianto Jones.“ He cleared his throat and continued, a bit louder, “This is Matthew York and his son Michael. I just explained to Matthew how we got here. He knows that we'll be gone by tomorrow evening and he won't tell the others about us.“

Owen got up and stared at Matthew, appraising him, before he asked, “Does he know why we're here?“

Gwen knew that he couldn't be talking about the accident with the wristband. He was trying to find out if Jack had warned Matthew.

Jack nodded at Owen. “He knows about the malfunction of my vortex manipulator.“

Owen nodded in satisfaction. “Good.“

Gwen could only imagine how much effort it must have cost Jack not to tell Matthew the truth. An uncomfortable silence descended. 

Matthew broke it. “Should I … I should make some tea. Do you want … tea?“

Gwen tried a smile. “Sounds lovely.“

Owen said, “I'm hungry.“

Matthew gave him an almost relieved smile, as if he was glad to finally be able to do something. “I can get you something. While the tea brews.“

Gwen was surprised when Ianto suggested, “I'll make the tea.“ He seemed almost as relieved as Matthew to be able to do something, and Jack nodded towards the furnace and the kettle sitting on it. Ianto went to fill it at the small basin in the corner of the room. Matthew fetched a can with tea leaves from one of the cupboards and Ianto gifted him with a tense smile. Gwen realized that he seemed a bit better, just because there was something he could do. 

Jack made a soothing noise when Michael whimpered softly and the baby calmed down immediately. Jack smiled triumphantly, then he turned to his team, “We'll get some sandwiches, then.“ He and Matthew left the room and silence descended.

Finally, Owen asked, “Did Jack just actually hold a baby?“

“As far as I know,“ Gwen explained, “they were a proper couple.“

Owen snorted. “I date single mothers now and again, but I'd never volunteer to get to know their kids.“

For some reason, Owen's words made Gwen angry. She'd never been happy about the way Owen talked about his shags and affairs, but since she'd slept with him, the words stung even more.

That was why she couldn't quite keep the poison out of her voice when she asked, “Why care about them, then?“

Owen shrugged. “Easier to bed. More desperate, if you get my drift.“

“You're such a bastard, Owen,“ Gwen said.

***

When Jack and Matthew were on their way back downstairs with a plate of sandwiches, Jack saw Eveline and James sitting in Constantine's office.

“What's going on there?“ Jack asked.

Matthew shrugged. “They never tell me anything, you know that, but Constantine's upset. We've had people from London here. He sent me away while they talked. I'm not allowed in the archives anymore, not even to get files.“

In that moment, Constantine's voice echoed through the room. “Jack, wait a minute!“ Jack and Matthew turned around to him. Constantine approached them and stared at Matthew disapprovingly. “I didn't tell you to wait, lad. I was talking to the captain.“

Matthew nodded hastily. “Sure. I'm sorry, sir.“

Constantine watched Matthew go. Jack frowned. His thumb caressed circles on Michael's chest, a motion that seemed to calm him. It seemed only to work for Jack, though, as he and Matthew had learned.

Jack noticed that Constantine was openly staring at Michael and cleared his throat. “It's not necessary to treat him like a servant.“

“He _is_ a servant,“ Constantine answered, looking up at Jack, “and more importantly, he's _my_ servant. You decided to sleep with him even though I told you I want nothing of that sort in my base. Consider yourself lucky that I'm so tolerant concerning your … arrangement. But you have to accept that this base, this team and my secretary listen to me and I decide what's best for them.“ Jack glared at him. Constantine raised one eyebrow. “Is there a problem, Jack? Maybe you want to reconsider your contract with us?“

Jack would have loved to answer that he would love to grab Matthew and Michael and leave Torchwood altogether, but he couldn't. This wasn't his time line. Nevertheless, he was angry. He and Constantine had never had this talk – after Matthew went missing, it had never come up – so he hadn't been prepared for it and now he had to ponder what to do without disturbing time.

“No, of course not,“ he said reluctantly.

“Good,“ Constantine said with a nod. “It's late now, and I have to leave for London, but I want to talk to you tomorrow. We have a problem.“

“London,“ Jack said, surprised. There was only one reason for Constantine to go to London this late in the evening. “Torchwood One?“

“Yes.“ Constantine rubbed his forehead. He seemed tired. “Could be that I'm losing my job.“

Jack was shocked. “Why?“

“Constantine!“ James called from the entrance. “The car's ready. We have to go.“

“You're taking James?“ Jack asked.

Constantine nodded. “And Eveline, too. You'll have to keep watch here tonight.“

That didn't mean anything but staying at the Hub in the rare case that someone sounded the alarm. The 30s hadn't been as advanced as the 21st century – no computers who could detect Rift activity and the likes. Just small, mobile devices able to find disturbances, but they didn't have a good reception and only worked near the disturbance in question, with the agents already at the scene. It would take a few decades until there would be a system of receivers bolted to the nearby roofs to detect Rift activity – a system that would find its perfection with the water tower. Until then, Torchwood had acted on rumors and had worked closer with the police. If there were strange happenings, a policeman would come to the Hub and sound the alarm, activating bells on every level in the Hub, enabling Torchwood to react.

“James and Eveline?“ Jack asked and he followed Constantine to his office where he put on his coat and grabbed some files from his desk.

“As I said, Jack, it's serious.“ With that, Constantine hurried out of his office and left the Hub.

Jack was dumbstruck. All these events had never been mentioned to him. Sure, everyone had been kind of confused and Constantine had acted strangely detached, but Jack had blamed Matthew vanishing for that mood.

Jack looked down at Michael. “What happened here?“ he asked him.

What hadn't they told him back then?


	13. Chapter 13

**12.**

 

Ianto stared at the floor thoughtfully, his arms crossed, leaning against the wall of the storage room Jack had dragged him to after dinner with the excuse to get blankets for them all.

“So?“ Jack asked impatiently. Ianto rubbed his forehead and Jack wondered if he was still experiencing such awful headaches.

“I can't think of anything, sir. The 30s.“ Ianto sighed. “There's a record about … no, that was the 50s. I know Torchwood's history really well, sir, but I have no idea what Constantine was on about. Was there never any indication as to what it could be?“

Jack shook his head. “They never talked about it again, as far as I know. I never noticed anything amiss – well, aside from Matthew.“

“There must be a connection,“ Ianto said.

“I think so, too,“ Jack answered.

“What will you do?“

Jack smiled bitterly. “I can't do a thing. I'll just have to wait what Constantine tells me tomorrow and then watch it happen.“ He brushed a hand through his hair. “I have to find the blueprints.“

Ianto shook his head. “Gwen did that already. She was down in the archives, with Ben. He's got a mobile with real good resolution and they photographed the blueprints. We didn't think it would be wise to mention that in front of Matthew.“

“Good.“ Jack looked at his vortex manipulator. “I hope we can go back within the next few hours. I don't know if I could be here while Matthew vanishes tomorrow.“

“Tomorrow?“ Ianto asked. 

Jack nodded. “I could see a newspaper lying around and according to the date, Matthew will go missing tomorrow.“

“If we didn't change history already,“ Ianto said. “What do you know about that day?“

Jack shrugged. “Not much. Whatever happened, though, it happened in our flat, because Michael was found alone in his cradle and Matthew never left him alone. He took him everywhere – the archives, his desk, whatever. They didn't have baby monitors back then, so he wouldn't have heard Michael crying when he was working upstairs.“

“That means that Matthew vanishes from your flat, leaving Michael behind. We'll have to find another hiding place tomorrow to make sure we don't accidentally avert what happens. Maybe we will be gone by then either way.“

“It happens in the afternoon,“ Jack answered. “Matthew had lunch with the team at noon and Eveline told me later that she did a medical check-up on him at four.“

“Then we should leave after the check-up.“

Jack nodded grimly and turned away.

“Jack?“ Ianto asked.

“I think it was Constantine,“ Jack said softly. He heard Ianto step closer and then he felt his hand on his shoulder.

“Constantine?“ 

Jack nodded. “After Matthew went missing, James told me that Constantine tried to push Matthew into using the fertilizer again and to let UNIT witness the pregnancy. Just think … UNIT's scientists would murder for such a chance. Even more so, since Matthew's first baby was born healthy. Constantine is ambitious. He doesn't make a secret out of it that he'd prefer working for UNIT. If he'd taken Matthew's files to them, then that could have bought him a job. That's why Eveline and I destroyed the files about Matthew's pregnancy as soon as we were sure that neither he nor Michael would have any negative aftereffects. Constantine was angry, but it was too late to save the files.“

“You think that's the reason for Matthew going missing?“

“I could never prove it, so I never confronted Constantine with it. Maybe Constantine will try again tomorrow to convince Matthew to undergo a second pregnancy. If Matthew turns him down ...“

“Jack,“ Ianto said softly, “it has to happen.“

“I know,“ Jack answered. “I know.“ He turned around to face Ianto. “That doesn't make it easier.“

***

While Owen and Ben were busy setting up the camp beds, Matthew joined Gwen who was sitting in the rocking chair with Michael. He crouched down to be closer to his son. “He's asleep,“ Matthew said softly and caressed Michael's cheek. “He likes you.“

“Strange,“ Gwen said. “I'm normally not a kids person.“

Matthew smiled. “You don't have children, then?“

“I'm not even married,“ Gwen answered, “but I've got a boyfriend. We share a flat.“

“Unmarried?“ Matthew asked.

“Yeah,“ Gwen grinned. “Well, it's not as if you live by the rules. You've got Jack.“

Matthew blushed. “Jack,“ he said softly. “Yes.“ He looked down at Michael. “He's different. Seventy years have gone by for him. Something's changed him.“

“I think that a lot of things happened that changed him,“ Gwen said.

“He looks the same. Didn't he find the Doctor?“

Gwen shook her head. “No yet.“

“I wish I could meet him. I'd ask him to take us with him – me, Jack and Michael. Away from here.“ His voice was bitter.

Gwen asked softly, “When did you realize that he's immortal?“

“He saved my life,“ Matthew answered. Gwen looked at him questioningly and Matthew explained, “We were out at a pub. It was late and we left. In an alley, Jack kissed me – just a peck, really. We didn't realize until after that they had been following us.“

“Who?“ Gwen asked.

“A group of men. They'd been watching us in the pub. Maybe they became suspicious.“ He cleared his throat. “They attacked us. Jack sent me away and wanted to fight them alone. I … wanted to stay, but I can't fight and I just found out that I was pregnant, so I ran. When I got back, he was dead and then, he wasn't.“ Matthew looked up at her and Gwen saw tears in his eyes. “Where you come from, is it better? Jack told me that in the future, nobody cares who you're with.“

Gwen shook her head. “Not yet, but it's getting better. It's definitely better than now.“

Matthew caressed Michael's cheek. “I don't want him to grow up in our time. I don't want him to be ashamed of me when he gets older.“ He took a deep breath and seemed to get his calm back. Then he smiled at Gwen. “But it's good, that it gets better. Then I'll at least see it happen.“

“Yeah,“ Gwen said hollowly, “you will.“

***

Jack and Matthew shared the bed. There weren't enough camp beds for everyone, so Gwen volunteered to sleep in the rocking chair. Owen and Ben slept in two of the camp beds. Ianto and Tosh shared the remaining one. There was a candle burning in one corner, giving the room meager light.

Tosh heard Michael moving in his cradle and a soft snore from Owen, then it was quiet once again. Gwen and Ben were breathing quietly and regularly – deeply asleep. Ianto was lying behind her, one arm wrapped around her hip. Matthew seemed to be asleep, too. Tosh couldn't hear his breathing, but the soft chat between him and Jack had stopped a while ago. She could see them, too. Matthew's head was resting on Jack's shoulder. Jack's hand was caressing his back soothingly. He seemed to be awake. In that moment, he turned his head to look at her. Tosh blushed, feeling caught as if she'd spied on a private moment between Jack and Matthew. Jack smiled, then he raised his eyebrows questioningly. Tosh shook her head to show him that everything was alright and he looked at the ceiling. Tosh sighed deeply, frustrated with her lack of sleep even though she was exhausted, and decided to try it in another sleeping position. Carefully, she turned around on the narrow bed to face Ianto and felt his grip around her tighten, before his hand settled between her shoulder blades. She looked at him and noticed that his eyes were open.

“Sorry,“ she whispered.

He shook his head. “I was awake either way.“

“You okay?“

“Sure,“ he answered. She didn't believe him, but she also knew that now wasn't the time to pry. She closed her eyes and tried to relax. Nevertheless, she didn't get much sleep and whenever she opened her eyes, Ianto was awake, too.


	14. Chapter 14

**13.**

 

Morning came slowly. Jack hadn't been able to sleep properly and judging by the dark smudges under Tosh and Ianto's eyes, they hadn't either. Matthew got ready for work and Jack accompanied him upstairs. 

Just before they reached the main Hub, Jack held Matthew back. He pushed him up against a wall and kissed him. Matthew made a surprised noise, but then he returned the kiss eagerly. When Jack parted from him, he pressed his forehead against Matthew's.

Matthew smiled. “Why did you do that?“

Jack shook his head. “Just because I wanted to.“ He smiled, trying to suppress the fear that was making it hard to breathe. “I still love you,“ he whispered. “Seventy years and I ...“ He buried his face in the bend of Matthew's neck and breathed him in. He smelled like soap and the faint aroma of Earl Grey was clinging to his clothes. Michael made a satisfied noise, when Jack's warmth pressed against him, cocooning him between the two men. Jack kissed his head and then looked at Matthew. “Don't forget that.“

“I won't.“ Matthew caressed Jack's cheek. “Are you alright?“

Jack nodded slowly. “Yes. Perfect.“

“Good,“ Matthew said, “then let's go.“

As soon as they left the shadows of the corridor, James and Eveline noticed them. Eveline smiled and headed for the med bay. Matthew went to Constantine's office to start working. Jack joined James who was working at the big table, handling something that looked like a big metal ball with tentacles. Jack remembered that particular project. It had been an obsession of James that had lasted about a year.

He asked, “Still puzzling over that perception filter?“

James nodded. “It doesn't work. No matter what I do.“ Frustrated, he slammed a scanner on the table.

“Hey!“ Jack tried to calm him down. “You're brilliant. You'll get it to work.“ He tapped one finger against the hull and asked casually, “What's up with Constantine wanting to talk to me?“

“He'll tell you himself,“ James answered, “but it's not good, Jack. Torchwood One attacked Constantine. It didn't help that UNIT assisted them. He's moody as hell.“ He sighed deeply and turned away from the filter. “Why are you back already anyway?“

Jack shrugged. “I'm just taking a break.“

“I'd love to have something like that once in a while.“

Jack forced a laugh.

James frowned. “Everything alright?“

“Sure.“

“And you're getting along with Matthew?“

“Yes. Why?“

“You're different,“ James said.

Jack shook his head. “I'm not.“

“No. I know you, Jack. I'm your best friend.“ James raised one eyebrow. “Something's different.“

“Jack!“ Matthew called, leaving Constantine's office with Michael in his arms. “Mr. Jane is ready to see you.“

Jack was glad to escape the conversation and headed for Constantine's office.

Constantine was sitting at his desk, signing papers. Without looking up at Jack he said, “Close the door and sit down.“

Jack obeyed hesitantly. He wondered what he could have done wrong, but nothing came to mind.

Constantine put aside his fountain pen and cleared his throat, then he folded his hands and put them under his chin. “Eveline, James and I were questioned at Torchwood One yesterday. While you were gone, some thefts in their archives were discovered.“

“What kind of technology?“ Jack asked.

“Energy bars, a stun gun of the Judoon, a device of unknown origin that can be used to open locked doors, some smaller devices. The only thing Torchwood One's really angry about is the theft of a sonic gun.“

“Okay,“ Jack said. He cleared his throat. “What has that got to do with anything?“

“The devices vanished while I was at Torchwood One to take part in the annual meeting with UNIT. Matthew accompanied me.“

Jack remembered. Matthew's pregnancy hadn't been visible at that point.

“There's a witness swearing that Matthew's the thief.“

“What?“ Jack gasped. “No!“

“The witness claims to have seen Matthew using his old contacts in the archives to get access.“

“That's not true,“ Jack said. “Why should he do that?“

“Money,“ Constantine answered. “There's a black market for technology like this, Jack, you know that just as well as I do.“

“Matthew didn't do it.“

Constantine didn't answer for a moment, then he said, “We had to talk about Matthew's character yesterday in front of a committee. We checked our stores. Jack … there's technology missing from our archives. Cryo technology, a soul transformer ...“

Jack suppressed the urge to tell Constantine that the correct name for the device was soul viewer, a device developed by humans to serve medicinal purposes. The consciousness of a coma patient could be transferred into a healthy body to enable them to talk to their family. Some therapists used it to have a look at the memories of their patients to understand them better.

He shook his head. “Matthew's not the only one with access to the archives.“

“So, you tell me that it was James. Or Eveline. Or me.“ Constantine leaned back in his chair. “Or you?“

“Matthew didn't do it.“

“I know.“

Surprised, Jack stared at Constantine.

Constantine laughed. “What did you think? That I'll just give in and turn the lad in, even though I know that he didn't do it?“

“You're treating it like you think it was him. He's not allowed in the archives-“

“For his own good. I don't want to help them pin this on him. Jack, there is a mobile cloaking device missing from our inventory. Worn on the body, it makes the bearer invisible. It could be a former employee of Torchwood using it to get in unseen. Or it's someone working for UNIT. We had some delegations from UNIT here over the last few months and Torchwood One had them in their building, too. And one more possibility: someone working for Torchwood One. Three months ago, some archivists were here, remember? But Torchwood One doesn't believe me, only their witness. Some archivist who suddenly feels like revealing all his secrets.“

“You don't think that Matthew did it?“

“I believe a lot of things, but not this. I helped the lad to leave the streets behind. I know just how grateful he is towards Torchwood and me. He would never steal from the institute.“ Constantine sighed deeply. “I need your help to solve this case.“

“I can't,“ Jack said.

Constantine frowned.

Jack explained, “I'm not … I'll travel back to Scotland this afternoon. I have to get back to Torchwood Two.“

And he could tell that lie with a clear conscience, because he knew already that the true thief would be caught. He remembered dimly that Constantine had taken him aside after he'd returned from Scotland.

_“Torchwood One found the real thief. The witness admitted that he himself took the technology from the archives. He was even here to visit out archives and used the opportunity to steal.“_

Jack hadn't known back then what Constantine had been talking about and he hadn't asked. Matthew's fate had clouded everything else, so he'd just nodded.

Constantine shook his head. “Jack-“ 

“I can't stay,“ he explained. “I can't. You'll find the thief. Just don't tell Matthew anything about this until it's absolutely necessary.“

“Jack, I have to confront him with the accusations.“

“Just not … today,“ Jack pleaded. Not today. Matthew couldn't go missing with the knowledge that someone thought he was a traitor. Jack wondered if that had happened and if he'd just changed the time line, but it was too late. He bit his tongue and resolved to be more careful from now on.

“Fine,“ Constantine said. “Fine.“

Jack nodded his thanks and got up. “I'll send Matthew in.“

“Alright,“ Constantine answered.

“Everything will be alright,“ Jack said.

“Hopefully,“ Constantine answered. “Matthew's a good lad. I'd hate to lose him.“

Jack nodded at Constantine and left. While he was on his way back to his and Matthew's room, he realized that he seemed to have gotten Constantine all wrong. He'd never before noticed that he'd had fatherly feelings for Matthew. He'd always been so strict with him, but Matthew had never complained, even defended Constantine when Jack got angry about it. Knowing what he knew now, Constantine could very likely not be the guy responsible for Matthew vanishing, too. 

The thief. He had to be responsible. What had Constantine told him back then? An archivist from Torchwood One.

Jack looked at his vortex manipulator. He'd programmed the device to give him a warning ten minutes before the jump. Then they would have enough time to gather in a room. It couldn't be much longer now.

Jack was torn. On one hand, he wanted to leave as soon as possible, compare the pictures they had taken of the old blueprints with the new one and – hopefully – find Matthew. On the other hand, he wanted to stay and find a way to avert all this. Even though he knew that wasn't allowed. He was scared. Scared that the blueprints wouldn't point him towards a walled-off room. He'd searched the entire base already, his only hope was a room that didn't exist anymore – at least not officially.

***

The rest of the day was quiet. Jack wrote a report for Constantine about his findings at Torchwood Two. He didn't have any trouble making something up that sounded just as if he really had been looking through their archives to find useful technology. He'd written many falsified reports back then, hiding his search for clues as to how find the Doctor. Was he visiting certain places more often than others? Was there a pattern? But he'd never found anything and somewhere along the line, he'd given up on finding him and just waited for the promise of the seer to fulfill – he'd meet the Doctor in the 21st century.

He pulled the report from the typewriter and nodded at Eveline who was heading home, trying to hide his rising fear from her. With the report in his hand, he entered Constantine's office. It was empty, not even Matthew was here. He'd stopped working over an hour ago, after Eveline had examined him as planned. He would be back in their room – alone with Michael, since the team had left to wait for the jump in another room. Officially to avoid Matthew being pulled back into the future with them, should the vortex manipulator activate. In truth, they were trying to avoid changing time lines by enabling Matthew's attacker to make his move.

Jack put the report on the desk and froze. Something was starting to happen, he could practically feel it in the air.

He heard hurried steps behind him, but when he turned around, there was no one there. “It's starting,“ he muttered. He used the backdoor of the office to hurry to the room where he would meet the team.

When he opened the door, darkness greeted him. He gasped. They should have been here. The vortex manipulator issued the first warning beep.

***

Jack ran to his and Matthew's room and slammed open the door. The team and Ben looked at him in surprise.

“What's wrong with you?“ Jack asked angrily. “You were supposed to come and meet me directly after Matthew's check-up.“

Gwen frowned. “Is that already over?“

“He didn't come back?“ Jack asked and cold fear clogged his throat.

“No,“ Gwen answered.

Jack dug the heels of his hands into his eyes. “No. Something's wrong.“

“Hey, calm down,“ Ben said and stepped towards him. “Everything's alright.“

“Alright?“ Jack snapped and Ben raised his hands in defense. “Something's wrong. If we changed the time line somehow … do you have any idea what that could mean?“

Tosh put a hand on Jack's arm. “Okay, take a deep breath. What do we know about Matthew going missing?“

“Nothing,“ Jack answered. “Just that it happened here, because Michael was found here, alone, and Matthew would have never left him on his own.“

Tosh looked at the cradle. “He's here. Matthew left him with us so that Eveline could do his examination without interruption. He was going to tell her that Michael was already asleep and that he could leave him alone for the few minutes the check-up would take. We wanted to leave for the meeting point as soon as he came back-”

“He's here,“ Jack interrupted her, and stepped towards the cradle. Michael squealed happily when he saw him and raised his hands towards him. Jack gave him his fingers to play with. “He's here.“ Alarmed, he looked at Tosh. “So are we.“

Tosh's eyes widened and she clapped a hand over her mouth. “Oh, my God.“

“What?“ Owen asked impatiently.

“We're here,“ Tosh answered.

Ianto stared at Jack. “That's a paradox.“

“That's the thing with time travel,“ Jack answered, “you never know what could happen.“

Tosh added, “Or what already happened.“

“Sorry,“ Owen interrupted. “Please explain.“

Tosh turned to him, Gwen and Ben. “Michael was found alone in this room and since Matthew never left him alone anywhere, it was decided that he was attacked here, but Michael's not alone right now. We are here. Matthew let us look after him, only nobody could know about it. Because it's only happening now.“

Gwen's eyes widened. “It won't happen here?“

“No, somewhere else,“ Jack answered. 

The vortex manipulator warned them again.

“What does that mean?“ Ben asked.

Jack glanced at the manipulator. “Five minutes.“

A scream echoed through the Hub.

“Matthew,“ Jack gasped and then he was running, following the scream through the dim corridors.

“No!“ Tosh yelled. “Jack!“ 

He heard the others following him and ran faster. Somebody tackled him and they landed on the floor in a messy heap of limbs. It was Owen. “Let me go.“

“You can't stop it, Jack,“ Owen said.

“I won't.“

Jack pushed Owen away, but he held onto him and pressed him back against the wall. He fisted Jack's braces, trapping him. “Jack, you aren't thinking clearly.“

“I just want to see where they are,“ Jack said. “Where to look for him.“

“We took pictures of the blueprints.“

“And if there's nothing wrong with them?!“ Jack asked and pushed Owen away. He followed him, cornering Owen against the wall, and hissed, “Then that's your fault!“

Suddenly, there was someone between them and Jack felt two hands push against his shoulders. “Jack,“ Ianto said. He shook his head. “If somebody sees you … if … something goes wrong.“

Jack knew what Ianto was implying and pushed him away. Ianto stumbled against Owen who helped him to stay on his feet.

Jack stared at him, furious. “You mean in case I lose control and help him?“

“That would only be natural,“ Ianto answered calmly.

Owen said, “We have to stay together.“

The vortex manipulator warned them again, but this time it didn't stop after a beep. It kept on beeping steadily. Soon … everyone jumped when the few electric lights went out with a bang. There was one remaining light though, spilling around the corner. Jack ran towards it, just around the corner, and looked down the long corridor. There it was, a blue-ish light falling through the open door of one of the last rooms down the line.

“Ianto,“ he said. He felt Ianto's hand on his arm and the others close by.

Ianto whispered, “Storage Unit C13.“

Then the vortex manipulator activated and everything went black.


	15. Chapter 15

**14.**

 

Nobody had been hurt by their return. Jack's office on the other hand was a mess. While Owen took Tosh to the med bay to examine her once more, Gwen helped Ianto sort out the office. Ben was sitting on the couch, a bit forlorn at first, then scribbling madly into his notebook.

When only a few files remained to be put back into order, Gwen left Ianto to it and joined Ben, Owen and Tosh on the couch. Gwen hadn't felt that exhausted in years. Everyone seemed to feel the same. Ianto even more so, even though he was trying not to let them see that when he finally joined them. “Anyone for coffee?“ he asked.

Gwen and Owen nodded, Tosh shook her head and Ben asked, “A cup of tea?“

Ianto nodded. Gwen knew that he would lace Ben's tea with Retcon and wanted to try and stop that one last time. She thought that they could really do with someone in the media. Sort of a liaison. She couldn't understand why the others didn't see that.

When she joined Ianto and leaned against the counter, he was just dropping a white pill into a mug. Gwen stepped closer to be able to lower her voice. “Don't retcon him.“

“Jack's order,“ Ianto answered.

“Jack's not here,“ Gwen answered. As soon as he'd assured himself that everyone was alright, Jack had asked Tosh to print out the pictures of the blueprints and headed for the archives.

“He gave me an order.“

“Ianto,“ Gwen sighed and touched his shoulder. Ianto pulled back, pushing one of the empty mugs off the counter. It shattered on the floor. Guiltily, Gwen pulled up her shoulders. “Sorry,“ she said and crouched down to pick up the shards.

“Let me,“ Ianto said.

“I'll help you.“

“Don't, Gwen,“ he snapped and she recoiled. Ianto seemed shocked by his own reaction. He got up and straightened his jacket. When Gwen had risen as well, Ianto gathered up the shards and disposed of them. He put her favorite mug in the machine, and hesitated.

Gwen though that he, maybe, wanted to open up to her about what was wrong with him and asked, “Ianto?“

“It's after five,“ he said. “Do you really want to have coffee?“

She was disappointed, but tried not to show it. She knew very well that she was not close to Ianto. With a bit of luck, she came far behind Tosh somewhere after Jack.

She brushed her thumb over the smooth surface of the counter. “I don't know if I should stay.“

“I don't think that there's anything left to do around here.“ He exchanged the mug with another. “Take Tosh with you. Owen should stay. I'll need help with Ben and Jack shouldn't be disturbed right now.“

“Don't give Ben Retcon,“ Gwen pleaded.

“Gwen-“ 

“He could help us.“

“How?“ Ianto asked.

“I have an idea. Let me … let me talk to Jack about it, okay? First thing tomorrow. Until then, Ben won't have time to publish his story and we can ask him to come in again.“

Ianto hesitated, then he shook his head. “Sorry, Gwen.“

Resigned, she sighed. She would have liked to argue further, but Ianto seemed exhausted. “Well, goodnight then. I really don't want to watch this.“

He nodded in understanding. Gwen returned to the others. “Tosh, I'm leaving. Do you want to come with me?“

She hesitated for a moment. “Okay.“

***

Jack stared at the printed out pictures of the base and the maps from many different decades. Then he swept everything to the floor angrily. Nothing. The blueprint that was made after Matthew went missing only showed one difference to the older plans – a new storage room. Jack had compared every plan that had been drawn after that, but there was nothing standing out. No room had been walled-off, no walls had been shifted and no room had been downsized. Nothing. The only differences were new rooms, rooms he'd already searched.

He felt tears prick his eyes. They wouldn't find Matthew. His only hope and it had been destroyed. He'd been to storage unit C13 – the room the strange light had come from – but there was nothing there. Just as expected. The room had been searched by Jack decade after decade.

He wiped his eyes and stared at the ceiling. “I'm sorry,“ he whispered. “I don't know where you are.“

***

They took Ben home, told his shocked girlfriend about a visit to the pub gone wrong, and while Owen took Ben to the bedroom, Ianto dosed Kiera's red wine with Retcon. They waited for half an hour on the street and when they rang the bell again, nobody answered. Owen picked the lock. They took everything Ben had gathered about Torchwood and deleted the files on his computer and the pictures on his mobile. His notebook was still at the Hub. After they'd placed a sleeping Kiera next to Ben and switched off the stove, they left the flat, the box with the evidence on the backseat.

Owen, still thinking that Ianto shouldn't drive, was giving him a lift in his sports car. “I'll take you home and drop the stuff off at the Hub on my way to my flat,“ he said.

“No. I'll destroy everything today,“ Ianto decided.

“You should go home and sleep.“

“I'm not tired.“

“Yes, I can see that,“ Owen answered sarcastically.

“I won't do anything strenuous. I wouldn't be able to sleep much either way.“

“Huh,“ Owen said. He glanced at Ianto from the corner of his eye. “So it's got nothing to do with your mother.“ Even though he was concentrating on the street, he noticed that Ianto tensed up. 

“What?“ 

Owen forced himself to be patient. “You mentioned your family the other day and you seemed quite upset. So I thought, I'd look into it.“

“You had no right.“

“Yes, I did because it's stealing your sleep.“ Owen kept his eyes on the street while he waited for Ianto to think about his words. Then he asked, “So, I assume that there's been some kind of trigger to bring back old memories?”

He stopped at a red light, hoping that Ianto wouldn't jump out of the car, but Ianto remained seated.

Not saying anything.

So Owen continued, “I'd like to know why you didn't tell me. It's important I know such things.“

It was quiet for a moment, then Ianto asked, “Why?“

Owen passed a crossroad, parked the car, then he turned to Ianto. “It's hard on you and I'm your doctor. Okay, so you don't like me, which is alright considering that I'm never going to join the Ianto Jones-fanclub, but you're helping nobody by pretending you're alright.“

Ianto ducked his head.

“I want to help you.“

“Do you think I … be honest, do you think I tortured Lisa?“ Ianto raised his head to look at Owen. “By keeping her in that conversion unit? I wanted to help her, but maybe … I think the one wanting to stay in that unit was the cyberwoman and not Lisa and that would mean that I kept her prisoner.“

“Jesus,“ Owen sighed.

“Be honest. Jack thinks that way, so you can tell me if you agree.“

“Do I agree?“ Owen closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I agree that Jack's an insensitive bastard. As for Lisa, we can't know for sure, right? And maybe you're better off not knowing.” Ianto nodded slowly and Owen got the feeling that he hadn't convinced him at all. He wanted to avoid him repeating his question in some way so he asked, “What has that got to do with your mother?”

“She didn't want to go in that clinic,” Ianto whispered. “My dad called them … they came and ...” He sighed deeply. “They took her away.”

“They held her prisoner,” Owen said, realizing where the parallel was. 

“We did,” Ianto agreed. ”Her death was … it was better in her eyes than living there.”

“Is that what you think about Lisa? That death was better for her?” Owen hadn't been expecting them to end up talking so much with this deep understanding, but he didn't want to break it. This was important, he could feel it.

Ianto nodded. “By now I do.”

“Do you feel guilty because you think that way?”

Ianto stared out the passenger window. “Yes.” He looked at Owen. “How can I be glad that she's dead? I loved her.”

“I loved my mom,” Owen answered, “that doesn't mean I wasn't glad to get away from her.” He watched Ianto who kept staring out the window, unmoving for a few minutes. Finally, Owen put a hand on his shoulder. “Don't listen to Jack, okay? We can't know what happened. Maybe Lisa was still in there, somewhere, talking to you.” He hesitated for a moment, then he asked, “You and Jack … you aren't doing that thing again, right?”

Ianto shook his head. “No.“

“Good. That's the last thing you need right now.” He switched on the radio, trying to get them back to the real world without being too abrupt about it. “I'll take you back to the Hub. Promise me not to overdo it. Jack is to drive you home at 8 pm. On our way there, we'll stop at a take away restaurant of your choice to get something for dinner and you will eat it. You have to gain weight. You have to sleep.“ 

Owen stared at Ianto who was just looking back with an unreadable expression. Owen knew that Ianto had no reason to trust him. 

Finally, Ianto spoke, “Thank you.“ Then he turned his head away and stared out the windshield. “And I feel like Chinese tonight.“

Owen nodded with a smile. “Chinese.“ He started the car. “Sounds good.“


	16. Chapter 16

**15.**

 

The pub was quiet. The after-work crowd was long gone and the pre-party crowd hadn't arrived, yet. 

Tosh and Gwen had chosen a table in a corner and were sipping their beer. They didn't talk much, but the silence between them wasn't uncomfortable. At least to Tosh, it didn't seem to be. Gwen on the other hand felt guilty whenever she looked at Tosh. The night with Owen had been exactly what she'd needed, but she regretted it now. Not only because of Rhys who had been at home, asleep, thinking that Gwen had been called to work, but also because of Tosh who, Gwen knew, had a crush on Owen.

She wondered if she should tell Tosh, but she knew that it wasn't a good idea. She wished she could just erase it from her memory. She'd never thought that things between her and Owen would go that far – a few days ago, the only man she'd ever thought she would maybe cheat on Rhys with had been Jack and even that had only been a fantasy, not reality. Nevertheless … even though things between her and Owen hadn't been more than sex without emotions or tenderness, it had felt right. She hadn't wanted to be treated like she was made of glass because of her wound and Rhys would have done that, bless him. Owen on the other hand knew just how far he could go without aggravating her wound and he'd done nothing to harm her, but he hadn't been tender either. It had been great.

But after, she'd broken down crying, because she couldn't forget the words _“Because it made me happy“_ and then her guilt struck. At first, she'd just hated the job and then herself and if Jack had been at the Hub, she would have gone in to hand over her resignation and ask for Retcon, but Jack hadn't been at the Hub, but at Ianto's flat, looking after him, and the next morning, she didn't want to leave Torchwood anymore. 

Weevils hunted because they were hungry or defending their territory. Those humans in the Brecon Beacons ...

“How are things with Rhys?“ Tosh's voice intruded into her thoughts.

She pulled herself back to the present. “Oh, better,“ she said and smiled. _'Liar.'_ For Rhys, everything was better after their last big fight. He didn't know what Gwen had done. Tosh didn't know what Gwen had done. If she knew, she wouldn't sit opposite her so calmly.

“Good.“

Gwen nodded.

“What happened between you and Owen?“ Tosh asked.

“What?“ Gwen asked, startled.

“Between you and Owen. You're acting strange. Did you have a fight?“

Gwen shrugged. “You know Owen,“ she answered vaguely. They had fought, actually. The morning after when her bitterness and self-hate had reached a peak, and since that had happened, Gwen couldn't look him in the eye. She wondered if Jack and Ianto had noticed, too. If only one of them learned the truth … she emptied her pint. “I'm going home.“

Tosh nodded, hiding a yawn behind her hand. “Yes. Sounds like a great idea.“

***

Ianto found Jack in storage unit C13. He was sitting leaning against the wall next to the door, staring blankly ahead. The room was abandoned, only a few dim lights illuminated it weakly. 

Jack seemed beaten and tired. His braces were hanging down, his blue shirt unbuttoned and untucked.

Ianto sat down next to him and put the white plastic bag of take-away containers on the floor between them. “The blueprints?“

“Nothing,“ Jack answered.

“I brought you dinner,“ Ianto said.

“I'm not hungry.“

“You should eat,“ Ianto said. Jack didn't react. Ianto sighed deeply and got up. “I'm upstairs if you need me.“

When he passed Jack, he felt his hand grabbed and looked down into Jack's eyes. “Okay,“ Jack acknowledged and kissed Ianto's back of the hand. “Thanks, Ianto.“

***

“Hello, you!“ Rhys said when Gwen entered the flat. He was sitting on the couch, his feet up on the coffee table and watching a movie. “What's new in the rumor mill?“

Gwen hid her startled expression behind a smile. “Nothing.“

“A shame,“ Rhys answered. Gwen sat down next to him and accepted a clumsy kiss. “You okay?“ he asked and Gwen knew that he didn't mean if her day had been okay, he was talking about the wound. 

“Yes. Rhys, stop worrying. It's almost healed.“ That was a bit of an exaggeration, but Gwen knew just how lucky she'd been. Compared to the damage the gun could have left behind, she was fine.

“I think I'll need proof of that,“ Rhys said, winking at her.

Gwen leaned towards him. “Proof, yes?“ She kissed him tenderly. “What kind of proof?“

Rhys switched off the telly and pulled her closer to straddle his lap. One of his hands slid under her sweater to brush over the bandage carefully. Then it went higher, to her breasts and Gwen tilted her head to kiss him. Relieved, she realized that she didn't get flashes of her night with Owen as she'd feared. Or that she didn't subconsciously compare Rhys's skills with Owen's. She would be able to leave that behind and she preferred what she had here: tender touches, loving kisses and care.

“Let's go to bed,“ Rhys suggested. Gwen nodded and got up. Rhys took her hand and led her to the bedroom. Gwen left behind the memories of her night with Owen in the living room. They didn't belong in their bedroom – or in their life.

***

Jack had assumed that Ianto had left and on his way back to his office he berated himself on not giving him a lift home. But after he'd stashed his dinner in the fridge and turned around, he noticed Ianto lying asleep on the couch in the main Hub. Jack sighed deeply. He checked his watch – just after midnight – and went to Ianto. He touched the cup of tea on the coffee table – still hot, so Ianto couldn't have been asleep for long – before brushing a hand through Ianto's hair. He smiled when Ianto opened his eyes.

Ianto blinked sleepily, then he sat up rather suddenly and Jack thought he could hear his ribs complain. “Sir,“ he said with a hoarse voice. “I fell asleep.“

Even though he felt as if he'd just lost Matthew for a second time, Jack couldn't help but smile. “Well, it seems that way.“ He held out a hand. “C'mon. You can sleep in my bed.“

Ianto nodded slowly and let Jack help him to his feet.

A few minutes later, he was lying in Jack's narrow bed under the office, curled up against the wall. Jack arranged Ianto's suit on a hanger and left it dangling from the knob at his wardrobe. “I'll be in my office if you need anything,“ he told Ianto.

“Aren't you tired?“ Ianto asked.

“I'll sleep in my chair.“

Ianto shook his head and reached out a hand. “That's not necessary,“ he said. Jack hesitated for a moment, then he nodded and undressed to his underwear. He laid down next to Ianto, his back to him, then he switched off the bedside table lamp. Only a weak light from Jack's office was now illuminating the room, just reaching the ladder and the foot of the bed. Ianto was already breathing deeply and evenly. Jack didn't sleep for a long time.

***

Sleep didn't last long. One hour later, Jack was awake again, but he felt better. By now, he was lying facing Ianto, feeling his even breaths against his neck. When the rhythm changed and Ianto started to wake, Jack turned his head to check the alarm clock. He turned back to Ianto who was looking at him.

“It's four am,“ Jack said softly, sliding closer to Ianto to kiss his forehead. “Sleep.“

“I'm not tired anymore.“

Jack didn't quite believe him. There were dark smudges underneath Ianto's eyes he could see even in the dim light of the room, and he didn't seem rested.

“Try,“ he said. Ianto sighed deeply and closed his eyes. Jack put an arm around him and laid a hand on his back to feel his breathing. He didn't want to control Ianto – at least not primarily. He wanted the contact with another human being. Sleeping in one bed with Matthew had woken old memories. Memories of being safe with the arms of a lover wrapped around him. Something that was more than sex. 

“I'm sorry I lied,“ Ianto said softly, pulling Jack out of his thoughts.

“Lied?“ Jack asked. His hand slid from Ianto's back up to his hair.

“About the kiss,“ Ianto whispered.

Jack's hand stilled its movements for a second. “Why did you lie?“ he asked.

“I didn't want them to know.“

“Why?“ Jack asked.

Ianto sat up a bit and looked down into Jack's eyes. “They'd watch us. I … I don't want that. I want … us to be separate from the job.“

Jack smiled softly. “Us?“ he asked.

Ianto nodded. “I mean … I don't mean a relationship. I know what you said and after Matthew … well ...“ Jack's smile faltered. Ianto avoided his eyes as if he was embarrassed for bringing Matthew up. “But I don't want this to become part of the job. Whatever this is.“

Jack nodded in understanding, then he pulled Ianto into a kiss. Jack hadn't meant it to be more than a peck, but he stayed and Ianto didn't move away. Finally, their tongues joined in automatically and Jack felt Ianto's hand on his bare chest, fingers caressing him hesitantly, and all at once, he wanted Ianto so badly it hurt. He pulled him closer, wrapped an arm around his hips and flipped them to have Ianto pinned underneath him. Ianto spread his legs and Jack fell between them with a soft moan. Suddenly, he felt as if they'd avoided this moment for far too long, as if it had been clear from the start that it would come down to this in the end. He lowered his head to Ianto's neck and tenderly bit him, tasting sweat and soap. Ianto gasped softly, wrapped one leg around Jack's waist and pulled him closer.

Jack realized what he was doing. It was something he'd done for a long time, a pattern that was activated whenever he lost someone who meant a lot to him. Every single time a new loss proved to him that, in the end, nothing was final for _him_. To lose himself in someone else was something he needed those nights. Just to forget the world around him and not to think about the next day or how much he missed the beloved soul he'd lost. Normally, he would go out and look for someone he didn't know, someone who knew the rules Jack wanted to play by. Someone who didn't look at Jack with a worried frown or who asked him if he was okay. But Ianto wasn't that kind of person. He seemed to know Jack better than the other members of the team and Jack shouldn't use him just to forget Matthew for a little while.

He stopped and raised his head to look at Ianto. In the weak light, he could just make out Ianto's face, the raised eyebrows – an expression of confusion, a mute question. Jack's lips found Ianto's, this time for a kiss that was almost chaste, and he made to move away, but Ianto's leg had him pinned.

“Ianto,“ Jack whispered and shook his head.

“It's okay,“ Ianto said softly and gifted him with a small smile. “You want this, don't you?“

Jack lowered his head and rested his forehead against Ianto's. He didn't answer. 'No' would be a lie, 'Yes' would only be a confirmation of something Ianto already knew. Ianto pulled Jack into a tender kiss. One of his hands stroked down Jack's back, around his hip and to his belly to slide into Jack's pants. Jack moaned softly, pushing down on Ianto's hand. Ianto smiled and tugged at Jack's pants, prompting Jack to throw his doubts away before kneeling up and getting naked. He waited until Ianto had mimicked him, then he pulled him towards him to straddle his thighs, their erections brushing against each other.

Ianto hooked an arm around Jack's neck and kissed him passionately while Jack pushed them closer with a hand on Ianto's back. Their free hands found each other between their bodies and entwined around their cocks. Ianto panted, pushing his forehead against Jack's while their hands found a rhythm. Ianto's eyes were closed, Jack felt his erratic breaths against his cheek, Ianto's fingernails digging into his shoulder, their hands getting faster. It was so easy, a bit clumsy but perfect for a second, then Jack came and he heard Ianto's breath stutter when he followed him over the edge. Ianto's lips brushed Jack's cheek and Jack tipped his head back to kiss him properly, then his forehead went to Ianto's shoulder.

When his breathing slowly returned to normal, he opened his eyes and found himself lying on his back underneath the hatch to his office. Ianto was sprawled on top of him, his head next to Jack's, his even breaths caressing Jack's neck. Jack stroked a hand down Ianto's sweaty back to the swell of his arse, then back up to his shoulder and from there, on to his chin. He turned his head to look at Ianto and dropped a gentle kiss on his forehead. He smiled when Ianto looked at him. When he noticed Ianto starting to get cold, he fought the blanket out from underneath them to ward off the cool air in the Hub. They didn't talk, but then they never had directly after sex. For a while, the well-known sound of the Hub at night was the only noise heard. This was revisiting familiar ground after so many weeks of insecurity. It almost felt as if Lisa had never happened, as if Ianto had never been suspended and as if they'd never grown apart. 

Jack's thoughts went to Matthew, while his fingers caressed circles between Ianto's shoulder blades. It hurt, but he had to stop searching. At least for a while. His team needed him.

He would start to give Owen more responsibility so that he could get used to being a leader. He'd really showed them all what he was capable of under pressure. A few weeks, Jack told himself, then he could focus his whole attention to the search for Matthew, knowing that his team would be fine without him. He had to prepare them for that possibility anyway. The Doctor would come some time, maybe not until the end of the century, but maybe tomorrow.

When the Doctor had been to Cardiff the last time – to re-fuel his TARDIS – Jack had hidden in the Hub. The risk of running into himself had been too great. Instead, he, Owen, Suzie and Tosh had made sure that the base wouldn't collapse when the Rift opened above the TARDIS. He'd known instinctively that that visit of the Doctor wasn't the one the seer had prophesied. 

Ianto sighed deeply and Jack frowned. “Why aren't you sleeping?“

“I'm not tired,“ Ianto answered. He got up. “I think I'll get some work done.“

“Work?“ Jack asked, sitting up. “It's 5 am.“

Ianto put on his trousers and shirt, leaving it unbuttoned, then he took his jacket from the hanger and gathered up the rest of his clothes. “I think I still have an emergency suit stashed in my locker.“

Jack took Ianto's hand and pulled him closer until Ianto was perching next to him on the bed. “Ianto, are you okay?“

“Of course, sir,“ Ianto answered. He smiled gently and kissed Jack, then he ascended the ladder. Jack rubbed his face and brushed a hand through his hair, then he got up himself, put on his trousers and climbed up into his office. He expected an empty main Hub and maybe Ianto's shadow just hurrying away towards the showers and the locker room.

What he didn't expect was Owen standing next to his desk, holding Ianto's arm and talking to him urgently before he noticed Jack and glared at him.

Jack left his office and slowly approached them. “What's going on?“ he asked, shoving his hands into his trouser pockets.

Ianto shrugged off Owen's hand and shook his head. “Nothing, sir. Don't you worry.” With that, he left for the showers.

Owen held up his mobile. “I received a text message – an alarm,” he said. “Anita's blood pressure went through the roof.” That explained why Owen was in this early. The pregnant Weevil was his current pet project. He avoided Jack's eyes and passed by him with a muttered “Must have heard you two shag”.

Jack grabbed his arm.

“Don't touch me, Jack,” Owen hissed and pulled out of Jack's grasp, then he headed for the vaults.

Jack followed him. “Are you jealous?” he asked in disbelief.

Owen stopped and whirled around to face him. “No. This isn't about jealousy, Jack. This is about you treating Ianto like shit. First, you tell him that he tortured his girlfriend, then you shag him.”

“What happens in my bedroom is nothing you have to be concerned about, Owen.”

“Don't give me that!“ Owen answered. “Just this afternoon, you weren't able to think straight because you were grieving for Matthew, but look at that, a few hours later, you go around shagging Ianto, as if Matthew didn't mean a thing. This is low, Jack, even for you.“

Jack felt as if Owen had just slapped him. Owen seemed to see that because he just nodded, turned around and left.


	17. Chapter 17

**16.**

 

After Owen had found out about Anita's pregnancy, she'd been moved to a much larger cell than she'd lived in before.

She was now sitting in a corner on a big pile of straw eating meat, while Owen was watching her attentively. He was crouching in front of the plastic dividing him from the alien, one hand resting on the wall. “What?” he asked. “Why the hell did your blood pressure rise that way?”

Anita turned her head to look at him from her small eyes. She growled.

“Don't worry,” Owen said. “I won't hurt you.” He got up and checked the small monitor showing him Anita's vitals. “You're okay. Did you just want me to have an early start?” He sighed and crossed his arms, then he turned to leave and jumped when he saw Jack in the door. “Shit!” Owen cursed. “Where did you come from?”

“What did I ever do to cause you to have Ianto's back?”

“I'm not having Ianto's back,” Owen said. “I'm just tired of you hitting on everyone who … no, you really hit on _everyone_.” He pushed past Jack and headed back for the main Hub.

“Sleeping with Ianto has got nothing to do with my love for Matthew.”

“Oh, God! I don't want to have this conversation,” Owen moaned.

“And how is what I do different from what you do? You sleep with lots of women, Owen, and I just bet it's got something to do with Katie.”

Owen whirled around to him. “Don't you dare and bring Katie into this.”

“We're the same but somehow, it's more of a problem when I'm doing it.”

“It's not about you, Jack. Just accept that not everything's about you.”

Jack crossed his arms, his lips thinning stubbornly.

Owen let out a deep breath to calm down a bit, then he said, “I can't believe I'm telling you this, Jack, but I think we should make something very clear: Ianto is very fragile – emotionally. He's not able to make a proper decision about relationships. As his doctor, I want you to keep your hands, and other body parts, away from him.“

“Are you serious?“ Jack asked in disbelief.

“I'm just telling you to be careful. Ianto's looking for someone to hold on to and judging from the way he clung to Lisa … I don't think you want that.“ Owen shook his head. “Besides, you're not well either. An affair between the pair of you could be lethal. At least at the moment. It's not just about Ianto, Jack, but I'm worried about you, too. You're not doing well. I know because I've been there, too.“

He stared at Jack knowingly, until the other man ducked his head.

“That's none of your business.“

“You may be right,“ Owen answered with a nod. “I can't stop you doing anything you want to do and I can't forbid Ianto anything. I'm just saying: Be careful.“

Jack looked at him as if he wasn't sure about Owen's motivation, then he nodded. “There are no false promises,“ he explained. “Ianto knows what I want. Or don't want. If he has a problem, he's going to talk to me about it.“

Owen leaned forwards. “Yeah, well … I hope you're right.“

***

Ianto straightened his jacket and tie before he stepped into the main Hub. Owen looked up from his computer screen, grabbed a bottle of pills and tossed it in his direction. Ianto caught it clumsily and read the label. “Moon birdsfoot trefoil?“

“My very own mix. Contains plants from our hothouse. Mainly the moon birdsfoot trefoil. I don't have a cool name for it yet,“ Owen answered.

“You want me to take medicines you mixed out of alien flora?“

“Those are tested sleeping pills.“

“Who tested them?“ Ianto asked.

Owen turned his chair to face him and spread his arms. “I slept like a baby.“ Ianto remained skeptical. Owen sighed. “It's homeopathic,“ he said. “Those pills are enough to get you through the next two weeks. We'll see then if you need more.“

Ianto sighed deeply and nodded, pocketing the pills. 

“Ianto,“ Owen said when he passed him, “take them.“

Ianto nodded again, then he headed for Jack's office. Uncertain, he wavered at the door. Jack was focused on his computer screen.

“Sir,“ Ianto said softly. 

Jack smiled before turning back to the screen. “Ianto, remind me to check our Retcon.“

He frowned. “Why?“

Jack waved him closer and pointed at his screen. The screen showed the CCTV for Roald Dahl Plass, at this time of day almost deserted. Only a few joggers and people with dogs were out. And ...

“Ben Bryan,“ Ianto said. The journalist was sitting on the steps leading into the oval basin on the Plass, looking around. “He doesn't seem to remember.“

“No, but he's here. He's starting to remember. I wonder what triggered him and after such a short time at that.“

“Owen and I dosed him enough. His girlfriend saw us and was retconned too. There was nothing pointing to us. We cleaned up thoroughly.“

“I believe you,“ Jack said. “But first Gwen, now him … maybe something's wrong with the Retcon.“

“Maybe it's a coincidence,“ Ianto said.

Jack sighed and closed the program. “Maybe. We'll see.“ 

***

Owen was sitting in the boardroom, hungry beyond belief, his feet on the table. He was looking at the CCTV showing Ben Bryan on Roald Dahl Plass. Ianto entered the boardroom with a big paper bag in his hand and Jack, who was carrying a tray with mugs, on his heels.

“We've got a stalker,“ Owen remarked.

“Yeah,“ Jack answered, “we noticed.“

Ianto cleared his throat and stared at Owen's feet as if they were caked with mud.

“Come on,“ Owen said. “They're clean.“

Ianto glared at him and Owen rolled his eyes. He took his feet off the table and onto a nearby chair, then, following Ianto's pointed stare, to the floor. “Bully,“ he muttered and helped himself to a mug. “We should check the Retcon,“ Owen said.

Jack nodded. “Yes, that's what we thought, too.“

Owen rolled his eyes. “Why am I even here if you two can run everything on your own?“ 

Ianto handed him a roll.

Jack sat down at the head of the table. “Because you have such a sunny nature.“ 

Ianto sat down opposite Owen and tucked a napkin into his collar. Owen raised his eyebrows like he always did when Ianto took that kind of precaution, but he didn't say anything. “Seriously,“ he said instead. “Let's retcon him again. If he keeps hanging out up there, he will see us sometime and then his memories could be triggered.“

“I don't think it's necessary to dose him again,“ Jack answered, preparing himself a roll. “Not this soon after the last one.“ 

“What should we do then?“ Owen asked. “Run around with a perception filter so he won't notice us?“ Jack froze. Owen turned to Ianto. “Haven't we got something like that in the archives?“

“No. I'd know if we did.“

“Okay,“ Owen said, “which leads us back to Retcon.“ 

He looked at Jack, but he was staring at Ianto in bewilderment.

“There's no perception filter in the archives?“

“No, sir.“

“But there was one here … in the 30s.“

Ianto got up and went to the computer in the corner of the room. He called up the database of the archives and sent the image to the big plasma screen, where it overlapped the CCTV image. He typed _perception filter_ , but the database didn't have any matches.

“You aren't done with the database, yet,“ Jack said. Owen thought that his voice sounded strangely hollow, as if he wasn't really here with them.

“I digitalized every possibly dangerous technology. Perception filters are deemed dangerous, since they could be used as a cloak ...“

Jack jumped out of his chair and bolted.

“Oi!“ Owen called. Ianto threw his napkin down and ran after him. Owen rolled his eyes, abandoned his breakfast and followed them. He ran after Ianto through the main Hub, into the depths of the base in stopping in an empty room.

Jack was standing in a corner of the room, panting and staring at something Owen couldn't see. “Oh, my God,“ he whispered.

Ianto seemed to be just as confused as Owen. “Sir?“ he asked.

Jack whipped around to them. “There's a cryo-chamber just behind me, connected to energy bars and a perception filter.“

Owen's vision swam and he blinked. Then he saw it. “Fuck me!“ It was a box, like a casket, looking a bit like the cryo-chambers they used to freeze deceased Torchwood agents. The design was more elegant, though: round corners and instead of crude metal walls, it had transparent walls of glass, crusted with ice. It was standing on a table, connected to a round, blinking device beneath it. This had to be the perception filter. Piled up next to it were a few green bars which, Owen knew, were energy bars. They'd found similar devices in the ruins of Canary Wharf – energy bars who provided, if Tosh was right, a near endless amount of energy. Jack had told them that this kind of energy bar was used to fuel spaceships and that Torchwood had several of them in the archives.

Jack wiped over the glass, but the chamber was ice-crusted on the inside and Owen couldn't see what was in it. He stepped next to Jack, aghast. “Where did this thing come from?“

“It has been here the whole time,“ Jack said.

Owen put his hands against the cold glass. He could see a human form on the inside, just so. “There's someone trapped inside.“

“Matthew,“ Jack said.

“Let's not jump to conclusions,“ Owen tried to calm him down.

Jack turned to Ianto. “Call-“

“Tosh,“ Ianto said with a nod. “I'll get Gwen, too.“ With that he turned and hurried back to the main Hub.

Owen focused on the small screen embedded on the upper side of the chamber. Strange letters were on it and two horizontal lines. “Are those vitals?“ he asked.

“Yes, those are vitals. No heartbeat, no brain activity.“

“That's normal for cryo,“ Owen said and bit his tongue to avoid asking Jack where he knew the letters from. “Man!“

“Owen ...“

“I know. Give me a minute.“ He squeezed his eyes shut, then he nodded in determination. “The cryo-chamber may be different, but I know how to unfreeze someone. I've helped with Tommy a few times already.“

Jack nodded his consent. The last time they'd woken Tommy had been a few months ago. Owen knew what to do, knew how to freeze and unfreeze. He was just unsure ...

“Jack, I have no idea when he's been unfrozen the last time. If it's been longer than a year … nobody took care of him. He could be long dead.“

“This is advanced technology,“ Jack said. He pointed at some of the letters. “Here, it says protocol.“ He tapped on it and a table appeared. “Data. I can't read everything but it seems as if he was woken up automatically several times, scanned and then put to sleep again.“

“When's the next date?“

“A few months from now.“

Owen sighed. “Okay, that's too long,“ he said. “Tosh will be here soon. We'll bring him into the med bay, I'll have a talk with Tosh, we'll prepare for the worst case scenario ...“

“You want to wake him?“ Jack asked.

Owen looked at him and the relief was written all over Jack's face. “Yes. Let's give it a try.“


	18. Chapter 18

**17.**

 

Jack ordered Ianto to reschedule the call with the PM. He and Owen lifted the cryo-chamber onto a wheeled stretcher and used the old goods lift to bring it to the med bay.

When they arrived at the main Hub, Gwen and Tosh were already there and updated. As soon as the cryo-chamber had been placed on the autopsy table, Tosh and Jack started to examine it. Jack told her everything he knew about the device, which wasn't much, since he'd only seen something like this once on a human colony world. The technology was from Earth, 30th century, but the letters told him that this chamber had been built for another race. The cryo-chambers from Earth had been quite popular for some time and had been bought by races all over the universe – in whatever language you they chose.

With Tosh and his rather limited knowledge about the language of the Keldons, Jack decided that he would be able to open the chamber.

Tosh went to her computer and started the video recording, then she returned to the med bay. Jack's arms were crossed and he was watching Owen preparing a defibrillator and a syringe with adrenalin. Gwen and Ianto were standing on the upper level of the bay. Gwen was chewing her thumb nail, worried. 

When Jack looked at Ianto, he gave him a weak smile. Jack breathed out and closed his eyes for a moment. A snap startled him. 

Owen looked at him with a raised eyebrow and put on the other latex glove. “Let's start,“ he said. He readied the syringe.

“The chamber will wake him – no need to be prepared,“ Jack said.

“I'm just careful,“ Owen said. “This thing was standing around for seventy years. Maybe it's broken.“

Jack fought down the fear Owen's words provoked. Everything would be alright in the end, he tried to convince himself. 

Tosh put a hand on his arm and when he looked at her, she gifted him with a supportive smile. Then she pointed the scanner at the chamber and Jack knew that it was time.

“The energy signature looks good. Nothing out of tune,“ Tosh said. “No problems from my side.“ She looked at Owen. “The chamber's working just fine.“

Owen took a pointed step towards the defibrillator. Jack put a hand on the controls on the top of the chamber and swallowed. His finger rubbed over the button that would deactivate the automatic protocol, enabling the person within – it had to be Matthew – to wake up prematurely.

“Jack, do it,“ Owen said.

Jack pushed the button.

At first, nothing happened.

Then Tosh said, her eyes pinned to the scanner, “I read activity.“

There was a soft hum and then the glass on the top split and slid down. And there, on the autopsy table in the year 2007, a man born in 1907 was lying and he didn't look older than 26. Matthew York was naked and his arms, legs and the hips were restrained.

“No energy signature. Everything's offline,“ Tosh said softly. 

Owen's fingers were already pressed to Matthew's carotid. He put the syringe away. “Pulse.“ He leaned over Matthew. “Respiration.“ Then he checked the pupil reaction. “Looks fine to me.“ He started to listen to Matthew's heart. Jack put one trembling hand on Matthew's forehead and the other took Matthew's hand. Matthew's skin was cold and he was shaking. Owen covered him with a blanket.

“Jack,“ he said softly and Jack raised his head to look at him. “He seems okay,“ Owen said. “I'll do some tests later, but we should get him out of the cryo-chamber, first.“ 

Tosh wheeled a stretcher closer, one that was padded with blankets to cover up the cold metal, and Owen and Jack started to undo the restraints.

“Oh, my God,“ Gwen said. “Jack.“ 

Jack looked at her and when he noticed that she was focused on Matthew, he looked downwards. 

Matthew stared at him. 

Jack leaned down to be closer. “Hey!“ he said softly and smiled. “Hello, Matthew.“

“J'ck.“ 

“Yes. Stay calm, okay? We're getting you out of there and then Owen will do some tests.“

Matthew frowned and shook his head. “Wha'?“

“Jack,“ Owen said softly. “Don't overwhelm him. His brain's been frozen over seventy years.“

Matthew looked at Owen, then his eyes found Gwen and Ianto. “'ear?“

“What?“ Jack asked. 

Matthew turned his head back to him. He licked his lips and swallowed. “'ear?... Whi ...“ He coughed. 

Tosh stepped closer to Jack to be in Matthew's field of vision and answered, “2007.“ 

Matthew looked at her for a long time, then he sat up abruptly.

“Hey, not so fast!“ Owen warned, holding onto Matthew's shoulders. 

Jack put a supporting hand on Matthew's back. “Wait,“ he said gently. Matthew coughed, swayed and then he got up. His legs didn't hold him that well, yet, and he would have fallen if not for Jack.

“I have to …,“ Matthew panted. 

Owen stepped around the table. “You don't need to do anything right now.“ He opened a drawer. Jack squeezed Matthew to him, burying one hand in his hair. He felt Matthew pushing him away, but he didn't let go of him.

“Jack …,“ Matthew whispered. 

Jack heard him sob and then his legs gave out. Jack lowered him to the floor gently, pulling him to rest against his chest, one arm around Matthew's hips, the other hand on Matthew's cheek. “It's alright,“ he said softly.

“Michael. Where's Michael?“

“Sh!“ Jack said, nodding at Owen who was holding a syringe, muttering, “Sedation“. “You need sleep.“

Matthew jumped when Owen injected him and cried out softly. He tried to escape Owen, but Jack held him still.

“No, no, no …,“ Matthew sobbed. He hit Jack's shoulder. “What did you do? Let me … let ...“ He slumped in Jack's arms, losing consciousness.

“That's not quite what I wanted to see,“ Owen said. “A bit of confusion is to be expected, but this ...“ He shook his head.

“He's going to be okay,“ Jack snapped, pulling Matthew closer protectively. “He's fine. He just needs time.“ He knew that he sounded unreasonably aggressive, but Matthew was in his arms and he was breathing and _alive_ … he wouldn't let Owen take this moment away from him.

He looked at Ianto. “The room ...“

“... is ready, sir.“

Owen cleared his throat to get Jack's attention. “We should move him, he needs an IV. Fluids and nutrients.“

Jack nodded. “Give me a minute,“ he said, looking pleadingly at Owen. Owen sighed deeply. 

Tosh put a hand on Owen's shoulder and suggested, “Let's go ahead.“ She pulled Owen up the stairs and with Gwen and Ianto, they left the med bay.

Jack rested his cheek on Matthew's head and bit his lip to suppress a sob. “Okay. Everything's going to be okay,“ he whispered. He wiped tears from his cheeks and buried his nose in Matthew's hair, trying to find his familiar scent, but only finding the smell of sterility. “It's going to be okay,“ he repeated. “It's okay.“


	19. Chapter 19

**18.**

 

“If you ask me,“ Owen said, “then Jack's lost it.“ He took a sip of beer and returned the flirty smile a woman at the bar was giving him. “The kid's seriously gone bonkers.“

“Owen,“ Gwen said and shook her head. 

Tosh said, “Give Matthew some time. He needs to get used to this new world, first.“

“You really believe that?“ Owen asked, leaning back in his chair. “I am a doctor and you only have your romantic notions about a couple coming back together after seventy years. Life's not like in _When Harry Met Sally_.“

“And how many people did you wake from a seventy year long freeze?“ Gwen asked angrily, getting up. She put on her jacket. “You have no idea, just like us,“ she said. “A little bit of romance won't kill you.“

“You would know,“ Owen answered. “Our little relationship expert.“

Gwen glared at him and left the pub. 

Tosh looked after her before turning back to Owen. “Is it really asking too much to wish Jack some luck?“ 

“I wish him the best,“ Owen said, “at least I won't have to watch him destroy that thing with Ianto then.“

Tosh raised her eyebrows. “What thing?“

Owen grinned. “You don’t know?“

“What?“

“Great. Finally something about Ianto I know sooner than you.“ Owen sipped his beer, maybe more out of the desire to irritate her than anything else, then he said, “I was in the Hub a little early today, something I had to do. I caught Ianto sneaking out of Jack's room.“

Tosh shrugged. “So what? Ianto spends some nights in the Hub.“

“Oh no!“ Owen grinned. “Jack shagged him.“

Tosh bit her lip. “Poor Ianto.“

“And all of a sudden, that whole Jack and Matthew thing isn't that romantic anymore, right?“

“No … of course ...“ Tosh sighed, irritated. “I don't know.“ She didn't want to tell Owen that she though Ianto was in love with Jack. Owen was quite the master in using words as a weapon. Tosh wouldn't be the one to give him new ammunition.

“Get used to it, Tosh,“ Owen said and drained his pint. He got up and put on his jacket. “Life's not like candyfloss. You won't get the one you want and even if you do ...“ He shrugged. “... then something will happen that tears you apart. In the end, all of us will end up alone.“ With that he left.

Tosh wrapped her fingers around her pint and stared into the slowly dissolving foam. “Yeah,“ she muttered. “Looks that way.“

***

Gwen looked up at the cloudy night sky and hoped that the rain would hold off until she got home. She could have asked Rhys to pick up her up but she wanted to get away from Owen as soon as possible. She jumped when a car blew a horn behind her and took a step away from the street when a sports car braked next to her. She rolled her eyes when she saw it was Owen.

“Where are you headed?“ he asked.

“Where do you think?“ she answered.

“Home to your boyfriend?“

Gwen ignored him. 

Owen was driving next to her. “Come on, get in. I'll drive you home.“

“You could drive Tosh home,“ Gwen said.

“Tosh?“ Owen asked in disbelief. “Come on, Gwen. You want to tell me that you regret it? I thought you were having fun.“

A group of young women, standing in front of a bar to have a smoke, had heard his words and laughed. Gwen glared at them and got into the car. Owen accelerated and Gwen put on the seat belt. “That was a one time thing, Owen.“

“A one time thing?“ Owen asked. “That's a shame, since I thought we were brilliant.“ He stopped at a red light and looked at her with a crooked grin. “In fact, I'm fairly sure, I didn't have this much fun in years.“

Gwen blushed and turned her head away. “I've got Rhys,“ she said, and even to her own ears, she didn't sound convincing. “I love Rhys.“

“Love, I won't give you a ring anytime soon,“ Owen laughed. He parked in front of Gwen's flat. “Okay, you don't want anyone to know about it … I can do that. I won't send you flowers, promise.“

Gwen bit her thumb nail and stared through the front window at the street. “I don't want to talk about it.“

“Why are you still here, then?“ Owen asked. Gwen's eyes raised to her flat. The lights were on, Rhys was home. Maybe he'd cooked. After, they would do the dishes, watch a movie and go to sleep. Routine.

Owen laughed. “Look on it as a compliment: the night with you was fantastic and I would love to meet up again.“

Gwen turned her head to look at him and couldn't help but return his smile. Sometimes, unexpectedly, Owen was charming.

Owen winked at her. “Think about it.“

He was everything Rhys couldn't be. He was new and adventurous and innovative. He could do things Rhys would have never even heard of … she caught herself thinking about leaning towards Owen to kiss him.

Hastily, she shook her head and opened the car door. “No, thanks.“

“You can change your mind if you want,“ he said and she slammed the door.

Rhys was warm and loyal and domestic. He was the better choice, the more logical choice. She was sure of that … almost.

***

Jack checked his watch. He activated the comm link and turned away from their double bed where Matthew was sleeping. “Ianto?“ Jack knew that Owen, Gwen and Tosh had left over an hour ago, but Ianto had wanted to work in the archives for at least another half-an-hour. Normally, Ianto contacted him before he left so that Jack knew that he would be alone.

“Ianto, are you there?“

The comms had wide reception spanning the whole city, but at night, they left them in the base. Ianto not answering had to mean that he was gone. Jack just wanted to check if the security systems were running as they should. He didn't feel secure down here – far away from the main Hub – when he couldn't be sure that the alarms were turned on. Matthew was sleeping soundly and Jack decided to run upstairs and check. 

He entered the main Hub and went to Owen's computer to check the systems, but half-way there, he froze. Ianto was asleep on the couch, the suit jacket draped over the back rest and a pill bottle on the table. Jack went over to him and glanced at the label. Moon birdsfoot trefoil. He sighed deeply. From his office, he got a thick woolen blanket and spread it out over Ianto, sure that he wouldn't wake up. Moon birdsfoot trefoil was strong, but didn't have any adverse reactions and Jack sent Owen a silent thanks for the idea. Ianto needed sleep.

Jack checked the security systems and dimmed the light in the main Hub, then he went back downstairs.

He opened the door and stopped abruptly when Matthew, standing near the cradle, turned around to him. “Jack,“ he said softly. 

Jack smiled calmly at Matthew. “Hey! How are you?“

“I was … frozen and then there was … you found me.“

“Yeah,“ Jack said.

Matthew frowned in concentration. “Toshiko and Owen. Ianto and Gwen. They're here, too.“

“This is the right time line,“ Jack said with a nod.

“The 21st century.“

“2007 to be precise,“ Jack said.

“Seventy-three years,“ Matthew whispered.

“Yeah,“ Jack said.

Matthew raised his head to look at him, insecure, then he stepped towards him. “You really look like you did back then.“ 

“Well, we saw each other just a day ago,“ Jack said.

“Right,“ Matthew answered. “The time travel.“ He looked up at Jack. “This is real?“

Jack nodded. “I promise.“ 

Tears gathered in Matthew's eyes and he laughed helplessly. It sounded like a sob. “That's what a hallucination would say.“

“I'm real,“ Jack whispered. He reached out a hand. Matthew hesitated for a moment, but then he put his hand in Jack's and let himself be pulled into an embrace. Matthew sobbed and his arms wrapped around Jack's chest, painfully tight. “It's okay,“ he said soothingly. “Everything's okay.“ He kissed Matthew's hair. “I promise.“


	20. Chapter 20

**19.**

 

Ianto woke up, took a shower and ironed the suit to be able to wear it one more day. Then he prepared coffee and a small breakfast. Just when he was on his way to see if Jack and Matthew were awake, the two of them entered the main Hub. Matthew was wearing jeans and a black sweater. Both came from the small wardrobe Torchwood kept for undercover missions and both were a bit too big on his frame. Matthew seemed pale and younger than he actually was.

“There he is,” Jack said and stepped closer while Matthew was busy taking the main Hub in. Jack put a hand on Ianto's shoulder. “How are you?”

“Fine, sir.”

“You look better,” Jack said with a smile. “Good thing you could finally catch some sleep.”

“How is Matthew doing?”

“Fine,” Jack answered. “A bit tired but I think that's to be expected. Hungry.”

“I prepared breakfast, sir.”

Jack's lips brushed Ianto's forehead. “Great. Will you look after him? I'm afraid the PM's awaiting his call. I'll join you as soon as I'm done.”

Ianto nodded and Jack addressed Matthew who was watching them curiously.

“Matthew, Ianto's got breakfast. Go with him. I'll be with you in a few minutes.” Jack headed for his office and Ianto gifted Matthew with a polite smile. He signalled to him to follow and offered him a chair in the boardroom.

Matthew watched warily while Ianto poured coffee and sat down opposite. Matthew sipped the coffee. “This is great,” he said softly, giving Ianto a small smile.

“Thank you,” Ianto answered.

“I'm the one who should thank you.”

“Mainly Jack,” Ianto answered.

Matthew looked through the big windows down towards Jack's office and nodded. “Yes … Jack ...”

The alarm sounded and Matthew jumped.

“It's alright,” Ianto soothed him. “It's just the door. The others are coming to work.”

Matthew smiled nervously. “We didn't have anything like that.”

“Our Hub's a bit more secure,” Ianto answered. The door to the boardroom opened and Gwen and Tosh entered. They nodded at Ianto and then looked curiously at Matthew, who'd turned around to them.

“Hi!” Gwen said, offering him her hand. “Gwen Cooper.“

“I remember you,” Matthew answered, shaking her head. He nodded at Tosh who sat down beside him while Gwen took the chair next to Ianto. Ianto was glad that Gwen was here now. She was able to start a chat and keep it going. He tuned out her questions about Matthew's well-being and Matthew's shy enquiries about the changes the Hub had gone through.

With Owen joining them, the volume level rose because Owen was accusing Gwen of using his mug while Tosh explained to Matthew the technological advantages of the 21st century.

Jack joining them calmed things down a bit. The breakfast ended with Owen telling Matthew that he wanted to examine him more closely. Gwen and Tosh busied themselves with clearing the table and Jack and Ianto stayed behind.

Ianto wiped the table clean and Jack watched him attentively. “Are you sure that you're okay?” he asked, worried.

“I'm sure.”

Jack took his hand and pulled him closer. “Ianto … things changed. I don't want you to-”

“I know,” Ianto interrupted him. “You have to think of Matthew. You should rebuild your relationship.” Ianto nodded to strengthen his words, forcing a smile. “This is good. I don't have a prior claim.”

Jack looked him over carefully and Ianto became a bit nervous.

Finally, Jack said, “Right.” He smiled, squeezed Ianto's hand and left the boardroom.

***

Jack blinked into the autumn sun. He felt as if he hadn't left the base for days. The cool sea air hit his face, playfully ruffling his hair, and he took a deep breath. His arm pulled Matthew closer and wrapped around his hips, holding on when Matthew tried to step away.

“It's okay,“ Jack said soothingly. “I told you that most of the people tolerate homosexual couples nowadays.“ He could practically feel Matthew's insecurity and smiled. Matthew tugged on the jeans jacket Owen had lent him and looked around. He seemed to try to relax and Jack kissed his head while they strolled along the Quay.

A group of young women passed them and Matthew looked after them. “Those clothes ...“

“Yeah,“ Jack answered with a laugh, “but wait for the summer. It'll be even better. Short skirts, hot-pants, small tops … and I'm not talking about only the ladies, either, the men in some very special clubs around here are just the same ...“ He winked at Matthew and Matthew smiled.

One of his arms wrapped around Jack and held onto his coat. “Everything changed,“ he said.

“Yeah,“ Jack said, shoving his free hand in his trouser pocket.

“You too,“ Matthew said carefully.

Jack nodded. “I'm not saying it will be easy, but I'd like to pick up again where we stopped.“

Matthew avoided his eyes and looked at the sea. “Me too, but … you have someone.“

“No,“ Jack answered.

“Ianto,“ Matthew said. “I don't mind. It was bound to happen. I mean, I was gone for so long and ...“

Jack's lips sealed Matthew's and swallowed any protest he might have. He stopped and cupped Matthew's face in his hands, then he leaned their foreheads together and said, “Yes. Ianto and me had sex, but it wasn't a relationship.“

“I'm glad you have someone. He seems to be very nice.“

Jack nodded. “But it never was anything other than sex.“ He put his arm back around Matthew and led him up to the Roald Dahl Plass.

Matthew stared at the Millennium Center. “It's beautiful,“ he said.

“You should see it by night,“ Jack answered. He looked for Ben Bryan but he couldn't see him. Maybe he'd finally given up. “You want a coffee? I know a nice little place overlooking the Bay.“

***

Owen read through Matthew's blood tests and shook his head. “Nothing.“

Gwen raised her eyes from her screen and frowned. “Are you still trying to turn Matthew into a threat?“

“He is a threat,“ Owen said and turned his chair to look at her. “Please: cute young guy from the past unexpectedly turns up in his lover's life again. Everything's perfect. It's the oldest story in the world and it always ends in tears.“

“Maybe not,“ Gwen answered stubbornly. “Maybe it's just a romantic story coming true and you're just going mad.“

“Maybe Matthew will stab us all tomorrow,“ Owen answered.

Gwen shook her head in disbelief. “Can't you just be happy for once because everything's going smoothly?“

“Gwen,“ Owen said earnestly, “think about it: we have no idea who put Matthew in that chamber and we don't know why.“

“Just because Jack wants to give him some time to acclimate. We'll know in a few hours.“

“Okay, let's say we know. We know who did, but why did he do it? Why freeze Matthew in the first place? Why didn't he just kill him or got rid of him some other way? Why so complicated? Why did he make sure that Matthew was woken regularly? He could have just let him lie in that chamber forever, but he wanted his body to stay undamaged and why? Because Matthew needs to be fit when the time comes.“

“The time for what?“ Gwen asked, swayed.

Owen could see that he was starting to make an impact on her. “That's it,“ he said. “We don't know.“

***

Thanks to the CCTV, Tosh found Ianto where she least expected him to be. Carefully, she opened the door to the room where he'd hidden Lisa. Ianto was leaning against the wall next to the door, staring at the place where the conversion unit had been.

“What are you doing here?” Tosh asked.

Ianto sighed. “I haven't been here since that night.”

Tosh leaned next to him. She remembered dismantling the unit with Jack and Gwen while Owen had examined Ianto. When she'd offered to scrub the blood away, Jack had just shook his head and done it himself. The room looked as if nothing had ever happened. Nevertheless … Tosh didn't believe in ghosts but she thought she could see the faint outline of the conversion unit, hear Lisa's steps …

“Why did you come here tonight?” she asked to distract herself.

Ianto didn't answer for a long time, then he said softly, “Lisa doesn't have a grave. Not really. The one in London is empty. Jack incinerated her and the ash is hidden away somewhere in his safe because the cyber technology was incinerated with her. She doesn't have a drawer in the morgue.” He turned his head to look at her. “She was my world and now she's just gone. She doesn't even have a grave.” Tosh took his hand. He turned his head away. “Maybe that's why I can't let her go.” He sighed. “I really believed Tanazaki would be able to help her. But maybe she wasn't even there anymore.”

***

They were on their way back to the Hub, walking hand in hand, when Matthew asked the question Jack had dreaded. “What happened to Michael?“

Jack let go of Matthew and buried his hands in his coat pockets. “Constantine gave him away. I wanted to take him but … it wouldn't have worked.“

Matthew seemed to take that information in, then he asked, “Where did Constantine take him?“

“I don't know,“ Jack answered.

Matthew ducked his head and stared at the wooden walkway. “He's seventy-three years old now.“

“Yeah.“

“I wonder what kind of life he's leading … he won't even remember me.“

Jack would have liked to tell Matthew that Michael would remember him, but he wasn't stupid. Not very educated, as James liked to say, but not stupid.

“I don't think so. He was only three months old when you ...“ He stopped. “Matthew, we have to talk about what happened to you. No matter what you remember about it, it can only help us. We could ...“ He noticed that Matthew wasn't walking beside him anymore and turned around. “Matthew, are you coming?“

Matthew was just standing there, staring at the ground.

Jack frowned. “Matthew?“ He went back towards him and put his hands on Matthew's shoulders. “Hey, we … could try and find Michael. Find out how his life has been, but we can't contact … Matthew.“ He grabbed Matthew's chin and forced him to look at him. Matthew's eyes were empty, as if he wasn't really there. “Matthew?“ He brushed some hair out his forehead. “Matthew ...“ 

“Is everything okay?“ a young woman asked.

Jack shook his head. “Thanks. Don't-“

“I'm a doctor,“ she said, turning Matthew's head to face her. Jack looked towards the tourist office and wondered if the others were seeing what was happening. If Owen was. He hadn't taken his comm link with him and started to hunt through his pockets for his mobile.

“Weird,“ the woman said. “He seems to be in shock. Catatonic.“

“What could have caused it?“ Jack asked. 

Before the woman could answer, Matthew blinked and said, “It was wishful thinking.“

Jack gave up his search and put a hand on Matthew's cheek. “What?“

“It was unrealistic to think that Michael would remember. You're right, three months isn't a long time for a baby.“ Matthew seemed to realize that they weren't alone and that Jack was looking at him strangely and returned his gaze with a questioning one. “What's wrong?“


	21. Chapter 21

**20.**

 

“No signs of a stroke or epilepsy, his blood tests are good, normal pulse … he's healthy,“ Owen said.

Jack leaned back in his chair. “No. Something happened. It was as if just spaced out and then he came back, talking as if nothing happened. He didn't even notice anything wrong.“

“But his tests are negative, Jack! There's nothing obvious wrong,“ Owen answered, irritated. He threw Matthew's file on Jack's desk and crossed his arms. “Maybe we should dig deeper and consider other possibilities.“

Jack stared at him mistrustfully. “Other possibilities?“

Owen stepped towards the desk. “Something's wrong with him. I don't like it. We don't even know how he got into that chamber.“

“We'll find out,“ Jack said with a shrug. “I'll question him – now, if you want.“ He got up and put his hands on his hips. “But everything's alright with him,“ he said. “Whatever you are hinting at there-“

“You don't like hints?“ Owen asked. “Then let me make it clear: we can't trust him.“

“I trust him, so you can, too.“

“Jack, open your eyes!“ Owen answered. “You are so blinded because he's back that you're not paying attention.“

“Careful,“ Jack said, one finger pointing at Owen. “You're doubting my ability to make decisions.“

“How do you explain what happened? We never had this kind of problem with Tommy.“

“Maybe because it's another model of cryo chamber.“ Jack stepped around his desk and Owen realized that he was heading towards furious fast. “Instead of standing here and questioning my decisions – again! – you should find the source for Matthew's problem.“

“I already told you, I can't find anything.“

“Look closer!“

Owen could see that Jack wouldn't give in and that this would only end in a fight, but he believed that something wasn't right here and he wanted Jack to see it, too. “Jack, you're risking-“

“Owen!“ Jack stared at him in determination, the last warning before the storm. “Focus on your job.“

Owen hesitated for a moment, but then he shook his head. “As your second in command, I have to-“ 

“I'm not interested in your opinion!“ His voice was loud, hard and merciless.

Owen crossed his arms and pulled up his shoulder instinctively. He stared at Jack stubbornly and tried not to feel like the twelve year old boy who was standing in front of his mom in the trashy kitchen of their flat.

_“You look just like your bastard of a father! No wonder you're becoming like him!“_

Jack raised his eyebrows – a challenge. He took Matthew's file and held it out for Owen to take. “Go and find a reason.“ 

Owen grabbed the file and left Jack's office, ignoring Gwen and Tosh's curious looks, and hurried towards the med bay. When he arrived, he could hear Gwen's boots on the tiles. She stopped at the entrance.

“We could hear you,“ she said.

Owen slapped Matthew's file on the autopsy table. “Yes, he doesn't agree with me,“ he snapped. He opened the file and stared at Matthew's tests.

“Are you okay?“ Gwen asked.

Owen whirled around to her. “Piss off!“

She raised her hands in defence and left the room. Owen heard her talking with Tosh, but he tuned them out. He pushed his palms against the cool metal and tried to stop trembling. He'd always had problems standing up to Jack when he got this angry. He could state his opinion, taunt and get defensive until they reached a certain point where their arguments turned into a fight and Jack became a force of nature. 

Owen heard steps behind him and was about to tell Gwen to leave, but it was Tosh standing next to him suddenly, putting a hand on his shoulder. Owen was angry at Jack and his own cowardice, but he didn't have the energy to be angry at Tosh, too. “It's alright,“ he said softly and focused on Matthew's file.

“You know how he can be,“ Tosh said. “He's worried. He'll calm down and then he'll be sorry.“

Owen shrugged, but he didn't answer.

***

“I hope I'll be working for Torchwood again, soon,“ Matthew said, cutting through the silence that had reigned the tourist office. Ianto handed him a pile of flyers and Matthew looked for a free space on the shelf to put them.

“As soon as Owen confirms that you're healthy, you can do whatever you like,“ Ianto said. “We'll create a new identity for you … school reports, a CV. You could attend a computer class.“ He shook his head. “That's something you really should do.“

Matthew nodded. “But I want to work for Torchwood.“ Ianto handed him another pile. Matthew froze thoughtfully. “I wouldn't steal your job, right?“

Ianto raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Mine? No, don't worry. I'm really an archivist.“

“Some help wouldn't hurt?“ Matthew asked. 

Ianto forced a smile he didn't feel like and answered, “No.“

His comm link crackled and then Jack said, _“Ianto, bring Matthew into the boardroom. I want him to make his report now. You'll be recording.“_

“Yes, sir,“ he said.

***

“It started when you left for London just before Michael was born. You were after ...“ Matthew interrupted himself, glancing at Ianto uncertainly.

Jack put a calming hand on his arm. “I deleted the Doctor from the list of threats against the planet when I took over Torchwood Three. You can talk about him.“

Matthew sipped his tea. “The Doctor was seen in London and you went after him. That's when it stared,“ he repeated. “He got pushy, tried to convince me and Eveline to send the files about the pregnancy to UNIT and to work with them.“

“They would have treated you like a lab rat,“ Jack said in disbelief. Angrily, he balled his hands to fists. “There's a reason me and Eveline destroyed those files. I can't believe that Constantine kept pushing you to report your pregnancy to UNIT.“

Matthew bit his lip. “It wasn't Constantine.“

Surprised, Jack stared at him. “What?“

“It wasn't Constantine,“ Matthew said. “It was James.“

Jack shook his head. “No. Constantine wanted to report it to UNIT. Constantine tried to convince you later on to start a second pregnancy.“

“Who told you that?“ Matthew asked carefully.

Jack leaned back in his chair. “James,“ he said softly. James, who'd worked on the perception filter in the 30s, the one that hid the cryo chamber. James, who most likely was responsible for the theft of the energy bars and every other missing technology. James, who'd watched them blame Matthew for the theft. James, Jack's best friend. His confidant.

“James wanted me to use the fertilizer again to become pregnant and have a second child. This time with UNIT. He said we would make a lot of money and the only favour I had to do him was to make him head scientist on the project.“

“Matthew, I was home after Michael's birth. Why didn't you tell me?“

“Because he didn't threaten me,“ Matthew answered. “He just made some suggestions I didn't agree with and I didn't want you to worry.“

“What happened?“ Jack asked. 

Matthew seemed to know that he was talking about his disappearance now, because he answered, “I was on my way to our room to say goodbye to you lot when I noticed a bright light in storage unit C13. I caught him there – with technology he shouldn't have access to in the first place. He was trying to activate the perception filter to hide the stuff and it worked. He saw me.“ Matthew avoided Jack's eyes, embarrassed. “He was faster than me and I … never learned how to fight.“

“Storage unit C13“, Jack said and looked at Ianto. “I always wondered what James was doing there the evening he killed himself.“

“He killed himself?“ Matthew asked.

Jack nodded. “He poisoned himself, one year after you went missing. Constantine told me back then that an archivist from Torchwood One stole that technology you saw. Maybe James paid him for that confession … or he blackmailed him.“ He closed his eyes. “I trusted him.“ He'd spent two years blaming Constantine until he'd died. Jack had been happy that he was gone. But James ...

“I was wrong,“ he said.

***

Owen left the tourist office and would have slammed the door, if not for Gwen following him. 

“Jack doesn't even see that we still have no answer to the question of why James froze Matthew,“ he said and hurried towards Roald Dahl Plass.

Gwen followed him with hurried steps. “We'll never know, Owen. James killed himself. How can we know?“

“Something's wrong,“ Owen said. “There's something we don't see.“

Gwen grabbed his arm. “You're chasing ghosts, Owen. Stop it.“

“You were with the police,“ Owen said. “I'm sure you were aiming to solve murders?“

Gwen let go of him and shrugged. “I don't know. Maybe. I hadn't made up my mind yet. I thought that vice or drug enforcement were interesting.“

“Doesn't matter,“ Owen answered. “Just imagine we're cracking a murder case.“ He stared at her pleadingly. “Something's wrong. What is it?“

“Grow up, Owen,“ Gwen said and turned away. “Be happy for Jack for once!“ she called over her shoulder.

Owen stayed behind and cursed softly.

“Bad day?“ a man behind him asked and Owen answered, “Nothing new there.“ He turned around and took a step back when Ben Bryan smiled at him.

“Don't worry, Doctor Harper,“ he said. “I come in peace.“


	22. Chapter 22

**21.**

 

While sitting in a pub with him, Owen found out that Ben remembered just about everything. He was understandably upset about the use of Retcon, but he understood their motives and limited himself to keeping an eye on his beer while talking with Owen. And Owen, who'd planned to only find out how much Ben remembered, found himself confiding to him about everything that had happened since the time shift and his suspicions.

“You're right,“ Ben said with a nod, “there are holes in Matthew's story, but Captain Harkness does have a point. James wouldn't have told Matthew why he did what he did. That doesn't mean you can't find out.“

“How?“ Owen asked. “That guy committed suicide seventy years ago.“

“In that storage unit,“ Ben said. “Why?“

Owen shrugged. “That's not all that unusual. A lot of Torchwood agents killed themselves.“

Ben pulled a face. “That's unsettling.“

“Not really,“ Owen said. “You get used to it.“

“Okay, let's forget 'Why' and focus on another question: how?“

“Poison,“ Owen answered.

“Poison … I take it that's normal, too?“

“Not really. We have guns, that would be faster. There's always the possibility that someone could find you in time with poison.“

“Why did he do it, then? And why in that storage unit?“

“Aside from the cryo chamber, there's nothing there,“ Owen said with a frown.

“Are you sure?“ Ben asked. “The chamber was protected by one of those … filters. There could be a second filter protecting something else. The reason for James' suicide.“

“He could have killed himself out of guilt,“ Owen said.

“There was no note, right?“ Ben asked.

“I'd … have to check. There's a file about it. But I don't think so.“

“If I were you,“ Ben said, “I'd investigate. Secretly. Have another look at that storage unit. And at that file about James.“ He got up and picked up his bag. “And don't you let Captain Harkness get in your way. First rule in my job: if you think something's not quite right, then look closer.“ He winked at Owen. “I was arrested three times because someone thought I was being overeager. In the end, I was always right.“ He turned away.

“Hey!“ Owen said and Ben turned around to him. “I can't just let you go.“

Ben returned to the table. “But Retcon won't work,“ he said with a grin, “and you can't shoot me. Not even Torchwood could pull that off, because I sent an e-mail to someone and in case something happens to me, it will be forwarded to the police. Torchwood won't want to be wrapped in that kind of murder investigation.“

Owen crossed his arms. “What do you suggest we do?“

“I won't write about you. I understand now that your work is secret for a reason. I won't write an article and you won't erase my memory again – that's the deal.“

“What do you want?“ Owen asked mistrustfully.

Ben shrugged. “Nothing.“

“You didn't have to talk to me on the Plass,“ Owen said. “You could have pretended that the Retcon works.“

“Yeah,“ Ben said, “I could have done that, but I just accepted a job offer from the _Cardiff Daily News_ one of the most respectable newspapers around here. I also think your organisation needs better cover stories and if I write those in the CDN, everyone will believe them.“ Before Owen could say something, Ben raised a hand and continued, “Tell your captain that I only expect one favour in return: If Torchwood goes public sometime in the future, I'll be the one to get the exclusive story.“ He slung his bag around his shoulders. “He knows where to find me.“

With that, he left.

***

Jack kissed Matthew's neck and down to his collar bone while his hands opened Matthew's jeans. Matthew tangled his fingers in Jack's hair and he bent his knees, pushing up his hips to enable Jack to pull down his jeans and underwear. They fell beside the bed with a soft rustling sound. Jack lay in-between Matthew's spread legs and felt them wrap around his hips. He heard Matthew groan deeply when their erections brushed against each other and swallowed his breath with a deep kiss. He remembered the last time they'd done this, the noise muffled against sweat-slick skin and pillows to avoid waking up Michael.

Matthew's fingernails dug into Jack's back and he pushed up his hips. “Jack,“ he whispered, an invitation. Jack buried one hand in Matthew's hair and kissed him again. The other hand opened a tube of lube. When his hand touched Matthew's thigh, he startled and Jack laughed. “What's this?“ Matthew asked and turned his head to look at the tube sceptically.

“Did I mention,“ Jack asked and pushed one finger into Matthew, “that humankind invented wonderful things in the last decades that make sex even more incredible?“

Matthew shook his head and closed his eyes when Jack pushed a second finger inside. His nose nuzzled Matthew's cheek and he waited until Matthew looked at him before he said, “There are so many things I can show you.“

Matthew smiled. “I'm sure.“ He gasped, his eyes closed and his legs tightened around Jack. “Yes,“ he panted. “Jack.“ 

“Good?“ Jack asked with a grin, adding a third finger.

“Yes, good. Right there,“ Matthew gasped and Jack laughed. He removed his fingers and leaned forwards to kiss Matthew while entering him. He stopped when he noticed Matthew staring at the ceiling, his face expressionless, his breathing calm and his cock soft all of a sudden.

“Matthew?“ Jack cupped his face. Matthew's legs slipped from their position to the bed. “Oh, God,“ Jack muttered. “Matthew!“ Feverishly, he kissed his lips and forehead. “Matthew.“ Jack got up hastily and looked for his mobile, before he remembered that it still was upstairs in his office. Undecided, he glanced at Matthew, then he shook his head, covered him with the duvet and stumbled into his trousers. Barefoot, he ran from the room, through the corridors up to the main Hub.

The mobile was on his desk. He pushed speed dial for Owen.

 _“What now?“_ Owen asked, irritated.

“It's Matthew,“ Jack said. “He's spaced out again. In our room.“

 _“On my way.“_ Owen rang off. 

Jack ran back, opened the door, hoping for Matthew to look at him questioningly, asking what had happened, but he didn't.

Jack stood in the doorway, staring at the bed in disbelief. 

Matthew was gone.


	23. Chapter 23

**22.**

 

Jack searched every room near their flat, the locker rooms, the archives and then, following a sudden inspiration, he headed for storage unit C13.

And found Matthew. He was standing in the middle of the room, dressed in his jeans, staring at the place where the cryo chamber had been.

Jack cupped his face and kissed his lips in relief. “Matthew.“ 

“Someone's here,“ Matthew whispered.

Pleadingly, Jack stared at him. “What do you mean?“

“Someone's here,“ Matthew said, blinked and looked up at Jack.

“You mean an intruder?“ Jack asked. “Did you see someone?“

“I mean a ghost.“ Matthew closed his eyes. “He's talking to me.“

Jack grabbed Matthew's arms. “Stop it, please,“ he said. Matthew opened his eyes and stared right past Jack. “Nobody's here. We're alone.“

“But he's looking right at me,“ Matthew said softly and he seemed close to tears. “He's right behind you.“

Jack whirled around instinctively. There was no one there of course. When he turned back to Matthew, he was looking at him in confusion. “Jack?“ He looked around. “What are we doing here?“

***

“I can only repeat myself,“ Owen said. “There's no explanation for his strange behaviour.“ He looked up at Jack who was standing propped against the autopsy table. “I looked for a brain tumour, but there’s nothing. You know, of course, that that might not mean a thing.“

Jack put his hands on his hips and nodded. “You think it could be the same thing that killed Katie.“

Owen's lips thinned and he nodded. “If it is, then I can't do anything. We can't see that parasite until it's too late.“

Jack ducked his head. “Damn.“

Owen looked at Jack earnestly. “You do realize what I'm telling you, right?“

Jack nodded, but he didn't look at him.

“If it is the same parasite that buried itself in Katie, Matthew will die. And if it isn't that parasite, then I can't do a thing because I have no idea what else it could be.“ He slapped Matthew's file on the autopsy table. “And that's fucking frustrating.“

“Don't give up,“ Jack said with determination, “look for technology you can use in the archives.“

“Alright.“

Jack jogged up the stairs to the main Hub, but he stopped at the doorway. “Owen,“ he said, turning back around. Owen looked up at him. “You were right,“ Jack said. “Something's off.“

“Back then, I wasn't ready to see that Katie could be having Alzheimer's. It's hard to see those things, sometimes. I ordered one test after another because I couldn't believe it.“

“And you were right,“ Jack said.

“Yes, but I could have been wrong,“ Owen answered. “I think it's different when you love someone.“

Jack put his hands on the railing. “Yeah,“ he said, not even denying that his feelings for Matthew were that strong.

“I'll do what I can,“ Owen promised.

Jack looked at him. “Thanks.“

***

Ianto was standing next to Jack's desk when he returned to his office, his hands clasped on his back, waiting. “Sir,“ he said.

“Where's Matthew?“ Jack asked.

“He said he was tired and that he would go and lie down,“ Ianto answered.

“Good,“ Jack nodded. “Good.“ He dropped into his chair and closed his eyes. He seemed incredibly tired and every minute seemed to make it worse.

“Something I can do, sir?“ Ianto asked.

Jack looked up at him and sighed. “You can stop calling me 'sir'.“

Ianto didn't answer, he just stepped around the desk and leaned against it, slowly, unsure if Jack would accept him being so close. Jack put a hand on Ianto's hip and closed his eyes. “I'm losing him.“

Ianto let the words hang. He knew it wouldn't do to tell Jack that everything would be alright, because maybe it wouldn't be and Jack knew that.

***

Owen returned to his desk and noticed that Ianto had brought him the file on James Lees he'd requested. He needed some time away from Matthew's case and decided to have a look.

“What do you want with that?“ Gwen asked suddenly from behind him.

Owen jumped. “Damn it, what's the matter with you lot?“ he asked. “Did you plan this? Are you always sneaking up on me now?“

Gwen didn't answer, she just stared at the file.

“I'm reading it,“ Owen answered and opened the file.

Gwen sighed, irritated. “What lead are you following now?“ she asked, leaning against Owen's desk with crossed arms.

“I'm not sure, yet,“ he answered. He glanced at Jack's office, then to the kitchenette. “Where's Ianto?“

“He's helping Tosh stash the perception filter, the cryo chamber and energy bars in the archives.“

“I hope for his ribs sake that he won't lift that perception filter onto the shelf.“

Gwen shook her head. “Tosh said that you could do that later.“ Owen rolled his eyes while Gwen continued, “They're just printing out the labels and dotting the i's and ...“ She sighed. “I don't know … his system's more complicated than that at the police and that's saying something.“

Owen tuned out her monologue about police reports and databases and focused on the report about James Lees's suicide. Found dead in storage unit C13, time of death, the date, everything as it should be … content of his pockets: some photographs and short notes were attached with paper clips. Keys, wallet … he froze. “That doesn't sound good,“ he said.

Gwen interrupted herself. “What?“

“James had a piece of technology from the archives with him when he died. It says here that he bought it on the black market where it had ended up after a theft.“

“Something was stolen?“ Gwen asked. “Not very secure down here, was it?“

Owen got up and hurried to Jack's office. “Jack,“ he said and put the file on his desk. He pointed at the photograph of a small black box with a red button. “What's a soul transformer?“

“Soul viewer,“ Jack corrected him. “You can send a person's consciousness into another person's-“ 

“Shit!“ Owen said. “We have to find Matthew! Now!“

***

Tosh pulled the brake on the trolley she'd used to transport the perception filter into the room with potentially dangerous technology. She turned to Ianto who'd followed her with a clipboard and was taking notes. “I say we leave it like this. Owen can place it on the shelf, later.“

Ianto didn't seem too fond of the idea of just leaving the perception filter next to the door.

“Just for half an hour,“ Tosh said with a smile. She reached out a hand. “The label, please.“

Ianto looked at her questioningly. “I thought you had already attached it.“

“I thought we would do that now.“ She laughed. “I'll get it.“

“No, I'll do it,“ he answered and hurried away towards his desk. Tosh crouched next to the perception filter and brushed her fingers over the smooth surface. She would have to ask Jack to let her examine it closer. Fascinating technology.

She straightened, intending to look for Ianto, but she startled when Matthew was suddenly standing behind her. “Oh, God,“ she gasped. “You scared me.“

Matthew smiled, then he raised his arm and when Tosh noticed that he was holding an iron rod in his hand, he was already bringing it down.


	24. Chapter 24

**23.**

 

Ianto froze when the barrel of a gun dug into his neck.

“Show me your hands.“

Ianto held his hands out to the side. He recognized the voice as Matthew's and his suspicion was confirmed when Matthew stepped around him. He was holding a gun from their armoury and an iron rod. “I don't want to kill you, so don't force me to do it.“

Ianto nodded.

“I need a piece of technology.“

“Which?“ Ianto asked.

“It's called a soul transformer.“

Ianto turned to one of the filing cabinets, but Matthew made a warning sound.

“I have to look it up. I don't know where it's stored,“ Ianto answered.

“Okay,“ Matthew said with a nod. 

Slowly, Ianto opened the drawer. He searched for the right file and leafed through it. “Okay,“ he said and put the file on the desk. “This way.“ He nodded towards the aisle leading down the rows of shelves and Matthew stepped back to allow him to pass by. 

They walked down the aisle, before Ianto said, “Here.“ He entered one of the small walkways and raised his head to discover three big, wooden crates next to a small box, in which the device was stored. “That's it,“ he said, pulling the ladder closer.

He made an inviting gesture, but Matthew shook his head. “Oh, no, you'll climb up there.“

Ianto obeyed. He blew some dust from the small box and pondered his next step.

“What are you waiting for?“ Matthew asked.

“I just want to make sure it's the right one,“ Ianto answered and opened the box. From his place on the floor, Matthew didn't see Ianto removing the device before he closed the box again. He dropped it. Matthew cursed and caught the box, but before he could raise his weapon again to point it at Ianto, Ianto had pulled one of the big crates from the shelf and let it drop. Matthew jumped back, but the crate hit his shoulder and he cried out. A shot went wild, but it didn't hit Ianto who jumped down the ladder and kicked the gun from Matthew's hand. He tried to pick it up, but Matthew hit his hand with the rod and Ianto pulled back hastily. He ducked and heard the rod slam against the metal shelf behind him. The next swing hit his chest and he fell. A foot kicked his chest and pinned him to the floor, the end of the rod pushed against his windpipe, making it impossible to raise his head. He didn't dare to make a move, since the end of the rod was sharp.

Matthew pointed the gun at him again. “Stupid boy!“ he hissed. “I'm not a damn secretary! I'm agent. Did you think a secretary like you would be able to trick me?“ He stared at the empty box and his foot pushed harder against Ianto's chest. “Where is it?“ he asked.

“What?“ Ianto panted.

“You know what I mean. Give it to me!“

Ianto felt as if the artefact in his jacket pocket was straining against the cloth, trying to give Matthew a sign as to its whereabouts. Matthew raised his foot and brought it down on Ianto's chest, causing him to cry out and ball his hands to fists.

“Give it to me!“ Matthew screamed.

“Let him go!“ Gwen's calm voice interjected and there was the click of her gun's safety. Ianto turned his head as far as he could and saw her and Jack a few steps away. Gwen's gun was pointed at Matthew, Jack was holding his Webley, but he didn't seem quite sure what to do with it. “Now!“ Gwen demanded. 

“I'm interested, Jack,“ Matthew said. “Are you shagging her … or him?“

Jack raised his weapon. “Who are you?“

“Don't you recognize me?“ Matthew asked and the rod's pressure against Ianto's neck increased. He gasped, Gwen took a step towards them, the gun trained on Matthew nervously.

Jack didn't move. “You're not Matthew.“

“You didn't answer my question. I really want to know. The pretty puppet or the cute secretary?“

“Who are you?!“ Jack screamed.

“It's James Lees,“ Ianto whispered, breaking the sudden silence.

Then James laughed. “My dear, he's smart!“

Somewhere, a shot rang out and James' weight vanished from Ianto's chest, the rod fell to the floor and he heard Jack cry out.

“Just a stun gun!“ Owen called.

Gwen knelt next to Ianto. “Are you okay?“ she asked.

“I'm not sure,“ he answered.

“Owen!“ Gwen called.

He hurried to her side. “Take Matthew to a cell,“ he told her and Gwen left them. “Okay, what hurts?“ Owen asked.

“My ribs. I think something's broken.“

Ianto turned his head to the side and saw Gwen talking to Jack. Jack nodded finally. “Alright. Let's do it,“ he said softly. She put a hand on his arm and knelt to put handcuffs on Matthew. Jack crouched next to Ianto. “You okay?“

Before Ianto could answer, Owen said, “Just making a new record. The most broken ribs within the shortest amount of time.“ He gifted Ianto with a tense smile, then he turned to Jack, “Tosh is on her way to the main Hub. She's alright.“

“Good,“ Jack said. “Great job, Owen. I'll help Gwen with Matthew and we'll meet up upstairs.“

Owen nodded an helped Ianto to get up.

***

James was leaning against the wall in his cell as if he was just standing there waiting for the bus. Jack shoved his hands in his trouser pockets and watched him through the plexiglass window. “Your plan failed,“ he said finally.

“How come?“ James asked.

“You're in a cell. I'm pretty sure that means you failed.“

James shook his head. “Well, I didn't plan this. Let's call it an unexpected complication.“

“Tell me how you did it“, Jack said. James just grinned arrogantly. Jack pulled the device Ianto had given him from his trouser pocket and held it up. “This is a soul viewer – I don't have to tell you, though, you know already. You used it to transfer your consciousness into Matthew's body.“

James pulled a face and looked down at himself. “Yes. Unfortunately, there was no other way. My old body was better. But no worries, I'll change to a better one as soon as I'm done with this one.“

“Why didn't you stay in your old body if you don't like Matthew's?“

James laughed. “Because this is the perfect plan, Jack. I need this body. Matthew is … let's call him a golden boy. My investment.“

“He's a human being with a personality, emotions and wishes.“

“His personality is collateral damage. Not necessary in light of the greater good,“ James answered. “Don't think I like it. I didn't hate the boy, he was … well, most days, I didn't even notice him.“

“He's not dead. He's somewhere inside this body, I know it.“

“He is,“ James said with a nod. “It takes a while for a new consciousness to take over a new body. That's why he spaced out and …,“ he laughed, “... saw ghosts, nothing more than my memories pushing back his.“ His face became serious. “But everything ends, Jack. Not long now and he'll be gone for good.“ He stepped towards the window and propped his hand against it. “Don't think I wanted this to happen. You forced me to do this.“

“Me?“

“You and Eveline and Constantine. Even Constantine, the one person I though would agree with me. Suddenly he grows a heart, who'd have though? Apparently, he really cared for the kid.“

“How did we force you to freeze Matthew and transfer your soul into his body?“

“He was pregnant, Jack!“ James snapped and shook his head in disbelief. “The first male pregnancy on this world and we had the opportunity to go public with it. Just imagine what amount of money some people would have paid for this. We could left this rotten rat hole. We would have re-written history. I would have worked out a way to make male pregnancy possible for everyone. Just imagine what that would have meant for humankind.“

“And what would have been the price?“ Jack asked. “They would have treated Matthew like a lab rat.“

“Not that again. When I realized that I couldn't convince you, I worked on this little back-up plan.“

“It wasn't a coincidence, then,“ Jack said. “Matthew didn't just happen to catch you hiding the stolen goods. You wanted it to happen that way.“

“I thought I'd be able to cajole him into using the fertilizer again. He survived one pregnancy, what would have been so bad about a second one? But he didn't want to. He thought it was too risky.“ James snorted in disgust. “I woke him up, a year later, and he still wouldn't budge.“

“So you used the soul viewer and poisoned your own body.“

“Yes,“ James answered. “I always knew that transformer would help me out one day, so I kept it.“

“And you think that I'll just let you go? That you can just walk away from this?“

James grinned. “Call UNIT and let them get me. Do me that favour. They'll be happy to have me as soon as I tell them what this body is capable of.“ He went back to the corner of his cell and leaned against the wall – self-assured.

“I don't need UNIT. I could just kill you now,“ Jack suggested.

“In this body?“ James asked. “You would be able to do that? Not knowing if Matthew may see what you are doing to him?“ He laughed. “I don't think so.“

“You may laugh … I would do it and even if I couldn't, my second in command doesn't have the same qualms when it comes to Matthew.“

Just for a moment, something like fear entered James' eyes, but then he shook his head. “You couldn't. Not without Torchwood London’s consent and they will investigate this matter and they will want me to live.“

Jack smiled coldly. “Torchwood London?“ he asked. “It's gone.“

“What?“ James asked.

“It was destroyed,“ Jack said. “Cybermen and Daleks conquered it and burned it down. It was never rebuilt.“

“You're a liar. Torchwood can't exist without London.“

“Look around,“ Jack answered, “we're doing fine without them.“

James scrutinized Jack as if he wanted to make sure he was telling the truth, then he grinned cruelly. “You won't kill me.“

“Give me one reason,“ Jack said.

James laughed. “I know where they took Michael.“


	25. Chapter 25

**24.**

 

“The problem is that James' body is dead,“ Tosh said and Jack massaged his forehead. Ianto entered his office and served Jack a mug of coffee. “The soul viewer doesn't recognize the body as a place to transfer his soul to.“

“Find a solution,“ Jack said.

“I'm working on it. I'll see if I can re-program it. I've already worked with technology of this kind so I should be able to make it work,“ Tosh answered.

Jack nodded and she left his office.

“Can you believe it?“ Jack asked Ianto. “All these years, all this effort, just for science.“

“Humanity always goes too far for science,“ Ianto answered.

“Yes,“ Jack said with a sigh. “That'll never change.“

***

It took until late at night, but finally Tosh said that she had re-programmed the soul viewer. Gwen was ordered to get James Lees's body from cold storage while Owen and Jack got James.

Gwen looked down at James' face sadly. “He was a handsome guy,“ she told Tosh, who was focused on her laptop. The soul viewer was attached to it with several cables. “Why doesn't Jack care about what James said?“ Gwen asked and her words echoed through the huge morgue of the Hub. “Why is he ignoring it?“

“You mean what he said about Michael?“ Tosh asked and Gwen nodded. “I think he's just thinking rationally,“ Tosh said.

Ianto added, “Michael was born seventy years ago. He's lived a whole life.“

Gwen looked up at him.

“Maybe fifty or thirty years ago, Jack would have hesitated. But now … it's too late.“ Ianto sighed. “And he could be dead by now. I think Jack just feels better not knowing.“

“You can't kill me!“ James said and he sounded desperate. Jack and Owen dragged him into the room where all former Torchwood agents were resting.

“We won't,“ Jack said. “You did that yourself.“

They stopped next to James' body and Jack and Owen held onto James arms, even though his hands were bound. 

James laughed. “Impossible. You can't transfer a soul into a dead body. It won't work.“

“Maybe you just couldn't do it,“ Jack said, “but I've got Toshiko.“

Gwen noticed that Tosh blushed and smiled.

“It's more about it being a technology that did originate on Earth and the fact that you didn't know what programming was in the 30s,“ Tosh said. James stared at her, then at his body and then he tried to run.

Owen cursed when James slid out of his grasp, but Jack had him. “Now, Tosh,“ he said. She took the soul viewer and pointed it at Matthew's body. She pushed the button and kept it pushed until the device was pointed at James. Then she let go. Gwen didn't know what she'd expected but it had been something a bit more spectacular. Instead, Matthew just slumped and James' body didn't move.

“Done,“ Tosh said.

“That's it?“ Gwen asked.

Owen helped Jack to lower Matthew to the floor.

“Yes,“ Tosh said.

Gwen looked down at James. “What happens to him now?“

“He's dead,“ Jack said. “He's in the darkness.“ The way he said it convinced Gwen that it wasn't a good place to be. No heaven, no paradise … as if Jack could hear her, he added, “Forever.“

***

“Jack?“ Owen asked and Jack thought that his voice was coming from far away, filtered by mist – muffled and without a body it belonged to. He blinked and then he heard the beeping of the heart monitor and Matthew's EEG, saw the bare walls of the med bay and felt Matthew's warm hand in his. Owen was standing in front of him, one hand on Jack's shoulder. “Jack, do you understand me?“

Jack nodded slowly. “We didn't make it in time.“

“Matthew's brain can't compensate. The cryo chamber and the strain of another consciousness suppressing his … it was too much. His brain was overwhelmed and now it's burnt out.“ Owen's hand squeezed his shoulder gently. “We had no way of knowing this would happen, Jack. Maybe if we had discovered James after Matthew woke up, but … I can't do anything for him. I could keep him alive with machines but it would just be his body and I don't think he would want that.“

Jack rubbed a hand down his face and tried to focus. “How long?“

“Not long.“

“Then give him to me.“

“What?“ Owen asked.

“He won't die in this room,“ Jack said with determination. “Not with all of you watching.“ He bit his lip to suppress a sob and forced back tears. “I'm taking him where he belongs. I'm taking him home.“

***

Owen felt incredibly tired. It was almost three am. The boardroom was smelling of pizza. They'd been hungry, but each of them had only eaten one or two slices. The silence was suffocating. They were all sitting in front of paperwork that needed to be done, but nobody was filling it out.

Finally, Gwen cleared her throat. “Are we really going to sit here and wait for Matthew to die?“

Owen rubbed his forehead and looked at Ianto who hadn't even eaten one whole slice and who was paler than ever. “No. Ianto will fill out the paperwork and I'll have to confirm the death, but you girls can leave.“

Gwen shook her head. “No, it's alright. It's just … so cold.“

Owen's palm slapped the table. “We did what we could, Gwen! I did what I could! Do you think I don't care?“

“Stop it,“ Tosh said softly. “Please.“

And the silence returned.

***

Jack's hand stroked up and down Matthew's back, his eyes focussed on the ceiling.

“Michael's asleep?“ Matthew asked softly.

Jack nodded. “Michael's asleep,“ he whispered. When Matthew had regained consciousness, Jack had thought that Owen might have been wrong and that Matthew might be okay, but then he'd realized that most of Matthew's memories were gone and that he couldn't remember the last few days.

“I have a headache.“

“It'll stop,“ Jack said softly and put a hand on Michael's head. “Close your eyes. Get some sleep.“

“Will you be here when I wake up?“

Jack pulled him closer, put both arms around Matthew and kissed his hair. “I'll always be here,“ he promised. “I love you.“

***

One hour after Matthew's last breath, Jack left the room and went to the main Hub. 

Gwen got up from the couch when he entered. “Jack,“ she said. He stopped long enough to nod at Owen, then he headed for his office. He heard Gwen following him and closed the door. She seemed to get the message and didn't keep following him. Jack took his Webley from his desk and climbed down into his bedroom. 

He closed the hatch. 

He didn't want the others to hear the shot.

***

“We should have stayed,“ Gwen said when she left the tourist office with Owen. The night air was icy, but Owen didn't mind that after the suffocating atmosphere in the Hub.

He shook his head. “Why?“

“To help Jack. He just lost someone he loves.“

“And he made it clear that he wants to be alone,“ Owen answered.

“Do you think he'll be okay?“

“I don't know,“ Owen said. “Frankly, I've never seen him like that before.“ From the corner of his eye, he saw Gwen wiping her eyes and asked, “Are you crying?“

“In case you didn't notice – I liked Matthew.“

Owen shoved his hands in his jeans pocket. “Yes,“ he said. “Me too.“ Again, he mentally checked everything he'd done. Maybe there had been a possibility of helping Matthew, maybe he'd been too blind.

“Shitty job!“ Gwen said and there were tears in her voice. “What we did … it didn't change a thing. Into the past and back to the future and getting James out of Matthew … and he died.“

Owen didn't answer and there was only the sound of their steps on Roald Dahl Plass and the distant noise of the traffic that was rolling through Cardiff before sunrise.

“He wanted to live here,“ Gwen said, “because he and Jack would have had a real chance here. What are we doing?“ She stopped and Owen did, too. Tears were running down her face and she looked up as if that would stop the flow. Katie had done the same, it had never worked. She sobbed. “Lisa and Jasmine and the cannibals and Matthew. And my old colleagues aren't talking to me because I'm 'better than them' now. And I can't talk to Rhys. All I've got is you and I don't even know you!“

Owen sighed deeply and pulled her into his arms. “You're exhausted,“ he said. Her hands held onto his jacket and he stroked her back. “You're shivering. You need sleep. I'll drive you home.“ He wanted to pull away and take her to his car, but found himself kissed instead. Surprised, he answered the kiss and allowed her tongue to join his. Then he remembered the CCTV all around the Plass. “No, wait,“ he muttered and pushed her away. “Not here.“

She pressed the back of her hand against her lips and shook her head. “What am I doing?“ she asked and even though Owen knew that she didn't ask him, he answered, “Being human. There's a lot of shit going down in our job and we can't talk about it. You're angry and sad, but you don't want Rhys to know about it. You're just looking for … an outlet for those feelings.“ He knew that problem. He'd had the same with Suzie. An outlet and it had been fantastic. He smiled at her. “You only can do that with someone who knows.“

She stared at him. “I'm with Rhys.“

“Yeah,“ Owen said, “I know. But Rhys doesn't get this.“

Gwen stared at the ground, her shoulders pulled up.

Owen shook his head. “I think you should get yourself home.“ He put a hand on her arm. “See you later.“

“Yeah,“ she said.

Owen turned away and headed for his car. On his way, he pulled a syringe out of his jacket and checked the label. If the oral ingestion of Retcon didn't work, they could rely on the injection. Jack didn't like to fall back on it, because it was a bit risky and it erased a good few weeks worth of memories. Owen hadn't told Jack about his talk with Ben and since Jack really wouldn't care at the moment, he'd decided to handle this situation himself.

Owen put the syringe away, got into his car and called Ben. “I talked to the Captain,” he said. “He says your suggestion's acceptable. Can I come over?”

***

“Are you sure?“ Tosh asked, eyeing Ianto with worry. “You look beat.“

He nodded. “I'm sure. I've slept on that couch before. I'll be fine. Really.“ He glanced at Jack's office and Tosh heard him sigh. “I don't want to leave him alone.“

Tosh nodded her understanding. “I'll leave and get myself home. It's back to work at noon.“

Ianto nodded. 

Tosh hesitated for a moment, then she hugged him. “See you later.“ Her lips brushed his cheek. 

“Yes, later,“ he answered.

Tosh smiled, then she turned and left the Hub.

***

Ianto opened the hatch, waiting for a moment to give Jack the opportunity to send him away. The dimmed lights in the Hub only illuminated the top steps of the ladder, so he switched on Jack's desk lamp and now he could see Jack lying on his bed, his eyes closed. Ianto descended the ladder softly and managed to reach the floor without making a sound. Now, he saw the gun in Jack's hand and he swallowed, but he couldn't see any blood.

He crept towards Jack's bed and wasn't surprised to see his eyes opening. Jack's fingers tightened around the weapon and he put it on the night stand. “I had reasons not to do it,“ he said. “Even knowing that I would wake up again.“ He smiled bitterly. “I had reasons not to shoot.“

Ianto sat on the edge of the bed. 

Jack closed his eyes and continued, “Four of them. You.“ He sighed deeply. “Did you ever think about it? After Lisa?“

“No,“ Ianto answered.

“Hm,“ Jack said. “That proves that you're a stronger man than I am, Ianto Jones.“

“I'd say that's a matter of interpretation.“

Jack turned his head away and closed his eyes. “I thought everyone had left.“

“They did,“ Ianto answered. “I'll be on the couch.“

“You're here too often,“ Jack said.

Ianto didn't know an answer to that.

“I'm going to depend on you soon,“ Jack said with a thin smile, then tears entered his eyes. “Is he ...“

“Owen and I froze him,“ Ianto said. “There's a form with the number of his drawer on your desk.“ Ianto pulled a key from his trouser pocket and put it on the night stand. “The key to your room.“

Jack nodded his thanks. Then he moved towards the wall. “Stay,“ he said. “Sleep down here.“ Ianto hesitated for a moment and Jack whispered, “Please.“

Ianto laid down slowly and let Jack rest his head on his shoulder, one arm around his hips. He stared at the ceiling and breathed calmly, trying to ignore Jack's breathing getting erratic when the tears came. He didn't say anything, since he couldn't find words that didn't sound like a lie or irrelevant.

He wished there was more he could do.

 

END  
04/11


End file.
